Team Gaki Presents
Team Leader: Rich Translators: BakaDollie BabyStand Shion Kenny Shizentaisuu Carley G. EcksDee Solarwings Typesetters: papi's bolgy-wolgy-yummy-cummies Sacro pencillover12 carebu kannibleklown Nigel Spencer Hamilton Textualpoacher Vladimir Krasiy tommysenarii Elestriel Andrew Grice Caleb Barrett Karaoke: Konohana Niji Translation Check: Oolong Quality Checkers: John Dread
An abyss of deprived emotions
It's at that time you fall into a state of ecstasy
Fall to the depths of ecstasy
Gaki no Tsukai's most popular series
No Laughing Treasure Hunter
This year's theme is Treasure Hunter!
The assassins of laughter
The strongest lineup
This year's assassins are truly impressive
Shut the hell up, midget! Sit down
NNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!!
Famous actresses,
An enthusiastic performance by any means
big time actors,
It's you?!
The hell are you doing?!
Assassins from every genre
Enter with unbeatable gags one after the other
assassins from every genre imaginable, enter with unbeatable gags one after the other
An explosion of emotions
A flock of extravagant guests in a Team Battle!!
A gathering of extravagant guests face off in battle!!
Storms of criticism
Storms of criticism for Downtown who drag the teams down
Escape from the oni
A big time star takes part in the challenge
This time, a world-famous star takes part
A variety baptism without mercy
They become victims to even bigger traps
So you're the descendant!!
Incorrect
He is given a chance to escape the slap?!
Hosei's long time enemy, Chono enters!
He's given a chance to escape Chono's slap!
I drank it! I drank it!
A story straight from hell!!
A midnight treasure hunt
ends in a scream and shriek filled climax!
A treasure hunt full of screams
don't miss the climax for anything!
T/N: Japan uses eras based on the emperor's ascension to the throne. Emperor Akihito plans to abdicate the throne in April 2019, thus the end of the Heisei era and the start of a new era.
The last 6 hour special of the Heisei Era
The last showdown of the Heisei Era
End of the year special episode: 24 hours No Laughing Treasure Hunter!
Absolutely No Laughing
Treasure Hunter
24 Hours!
Downtown
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Hamada Masatoshi
Ready?
Tsukitei Hosei
Thank you!
Cocorico
Endo Shozo
Tanaka Naoki
Everyone's so energetic
We know it!
This is something we see every year
Yep!
You guys are only like this at the start!
It's the truth
You're gonna be so tired later on
This year's theme is Treasure Hunter
Treasure Hunter
When you hear Treasure Hunter, a question mark appears...
Trust me, after watching the show
That question mark will remain in place
Even after watching?
After all that?!
It'll stay
Every year...
Well what can you do
Alright, let's start Matsumoto, engage VTR
Please watch the videoooooooooooooooooooo~
Enough already!!
No Laughing Treasure Hunter
There it is...
Started pretty early
The first morning
The invigorating light of the sun
The members' battle
greets our members before their battle
This year I, uh, I'm gonna go home in the middle of the day
That's sneaky
Yeah, the staff told me
"Matsumoto, if you want to go home, uh, go for it..."
No way...
Everyone wants that
Among the staff pretty much everyone agreed
"If you're feeling tired, just go home"
Oh, the sun came out
Oh yeah, feels nice
"Wait here!"
T/N: Matsumoto kicked it and knocked it over in the previous year.
Looks like they made it heavier so we can't knock it over
Who would knock it over?!
Oi!!
I didn't notice him at all
There he is
Coming from pretty far away
He's riding something...?
Giddy-up!
Fujiwara Hiroshi
Downtown's old manager
Can you tell what he is?
He's doing it this year too
A horse?
Makes sense he'd yell "giddy-up" then
Heeey!!
He's got a great face this year too
Whoaa~!!
The horse's legs are stiff
Giddy-up!
The legs are rigid
His front...
His legs and tail are completely stiff!!
Rigid and stiff!
That's right
Rigid and stiff!
You hear?
He's frozen
What's with that outfit?
I'm great at riding horses, man
He's just praising himself?
The only people who can ride horses with such talent in show biz are
Either me or Matsudaira Ken, you gnow... Know
T/N: Matsudaira Ken is a famous actor who is well known for his roles in Japanese historical dramas. He has several scenes where he plays a lord on horseback.
Either me or Matsudaira Ken, you gnow... Know
His previous line was weird
Not only did you mispronounce, but also your name is "Hiroshi" so that makes it confusing
T/N: Fujiwara's line for "in show biz" included "Hiroshi" which is also a homonym for his first name. So Matsumoto hints that it sounded like "The only Hiroshis in show biz could do such horseriding are..." There was no way to make that joke make sense in English.
Not only did you mispronounce, but also your name is "Hiroshi" so that makes it confusing
So, about this year's theme...
I ask Hosei for his guess every year,
Because his jokes never work out
I'm gonna select our three helpers, Hosei, Endo and Tanaka
By working together, make a guess for this theme with an airhead joke and present it
An airhead joke about the theme?
Theme?
An airhead joke about the theme...
Should be obvious just by looking
It's surprisingly hard to tell
He came in on a horse
Working together...
He has a horse...
How about a nurse?
Might be good
I think it'll work
Eh?
A pilot might be good too...
Nah, nurse is better than pilot
Go with nurse then
You're taking too long!
Say it together on my mark
Alright
Here we go
Ready, go!!
Nurse!
Hey!!
If you 3 thought about it together, it should've been 3 times as funny
Instead you're one third as funny!
I wanted to say that
The theme is already determined anyway
Even if you say that...
But yeah, nurse was really damn unfunny
You should've told us when we were discussing
You were there, listening!
Dental hygenist would have worked
He's laughing
He's laughing, so nonchalantly
See, he's laughing
They were really similar, so
Okay whatever
This year's theme is Treasure Hunter
Can there be a specialty like that?
...'sfine
" 'sfine" ?
He's using Kansai dialect
I was just asking if we're really covering such a worldwide topic for this
Our beginner Treasure Hunters start
their grueling occupation!
And now
After becoming Treasure Hunters
Every time, look at Hosei
They embark on their 24 hour challenge
Don't you have a better picture?!
I said Treasure Hunter, but what's with those outfits?
We've prepared some boxes for you to change in, let's go
they must dress appropriately
In order to become Treasure Hunters
First step to becoming a treasure hunter
is to change into fitting clothes
Hosei is always last, isn't he?
Until recently
It's been you for five years though
Everyone ready?
Yep
Alright
Open!!
*cough*
Why the cough
Y'all look a lot better in uniform
He's got a cold?
Hamada's the only one with a wig
We look good?
Last year we got in a heap of trouble over Hamada
So this year we kept your outfit normal
There's nothing normal about this!
I see
He's the only one too
I'm not normal looking at all!
Seriously, this guy
Is that your own wig?
What the hell
It fits a bit too well
How about we swap?
I'm always the one wearing this, so you guys do the blackface
I really don't like last year's look though
It's no good
We had that incident last year
As if we could do it again
How long are you going to complain?
We get hit and then after it's over, we still get hit
Rules of the game
The rules are simple
Be Treasure Hunters and work hard
During your duties, you must not laugh
Upon laughing, receive a punishment
No matter what happens while on duty, you absolutely may not laugh
That is all
Alright, the bus is going to come here, so just wait
Heipo themed?
It fits the theme, but looks kinda plain
Looks camouflaged
Omame Archaeological Research Institute
Here's what we got this year
Heipo Foundation
Archaeological Institute of Omame
T/N: "Omame" means bean, which is Heipo's nickname because of how short he is.
That's where you'll be working
No, it's weird
The name sounds like we'll be researching beans
It's "archaeology" but we're researching beans?
This is the commuter bus for the foundation
The bus was first thought up by the founder, Heipo
And now, they head towards the institute
When you step on this bus, the game will start
Here we go
Let's go
I'm already sick of it
We'll be going back and forth here too
Being the first to get on sucks
That's right
Let's get through it
I want to go by foot
I don't like this part
Are we not allowed to walk to the Omame Institute?
We're taking the bus
Here's where it starts
I'll go first
Please do
Treat me well...
No Laughing Treasure Hunters 24 hours
Yep, that's how it is...
...No, that's wrong
This isn't okay
You can't just stay out here
What?!
I got off the damn bus!!
I laughed after getting off!!
I got on and
then got off again!
It starts when you get on so
How many times have we done this?
They don't appear for this kind of thing, I think
Receive a slap on the ass from the Black Army
If you do a flashback, you'll see that it doesn't happen
Enough of this!
Getting on, getting on
Get this underway
Here we go
This place is pretty sweet though
Sit in our regular seats
The seats seem to be...
Over here
They got seat dividers too
As they set off for the lab, what will happen next?
They've finally started moving toward the institute,
Who knows what will happen from now on!
As if waiting for the curtain to rise,
the laughter assassins are now ready to appear
Arriving at a bus stop
What have we got here?
The worst, seriously!
Whadya want?
Don't be staring at West High's boss, Yuko-san!
Underling
West High's Boss
Yuki Himura
Masayasu Wakabayashi
Don't be staring at West High's boss, Yuko-san!
Knock it off, Waka, you asshole!!
Sorry
What good is there in picking a fight with normal civilians?
Sorry
T/N: Senpai is used as a suffix for people who are above you in grade, rank, etc.
But Yuko-senpai
Why did we come to a place like this?
Cuz of Haruna from East High
Yuko, that's bad!
West High
East High
A battle of the leaders
When East High's Haruna snaps, she's untouchable
the cruelest boss in town!
Even a great leader like you will be sent to the hospital!
I've got no choice, dumbass!
Yuko!
Haruna Kawaguchi
East High Boss
If it isn't the small fry West High scum
Don't mess with me, bitch!
Who you calling small fry?
Come at me, you toad
Did you just call me a toad?!
Don't mess with me!
Who do you think you're talking to?
You got a problem?
Hey you with the lips
Let's go!
Try me!
Underling Wakabayashi's Plea
Asks to stop their fighting
Stop them!
Come on, stop them!
Please
SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN, MIDGET!!
Midget, really...
I didn't even say anything
Coming at me like that...
If the teenage drama "Code Blue"
can capture your interest every week, and make you weep,
an eyesore of an entertainer like you
has got no business telling me what to do!
An old fart nearing his 60th birthday who watches "Cold Blue"
like a die hard fan is quite something!
She's got a point
I was watching it, but it wasn't...
Also
You promised to go to your wife's show
which is great and all
but then you overslept and ran late, so
she made you beg for forgiveness on your hands and knees backstage
No, wait
She really has that much power over you?
I wasn't on my hands and knees
You're just worn out garbage
just like Shimoda Kageki
T/N: Shimoda Kageki is a 78-year-old author and actor with a really eccentric look.
I didn't know about that
On your hands and knees!?
No, I wasn't!
But I definitely was late!
Watching Code Blue is up there too
I just watched it once
Bring it on you bitch!
Let's go, toad face
T/N: Inari is a sushi dish made of a fried tofu skin pouch with sushi rice inside.
Your face looks like rotten inari sushi
Who you calling rotten inari face?
Of course, you!
Hey baldy, could you stop their fighting?
Baldy, get over here and stop them
Is that how this is going to play out?
Excuse me could you plea-
SHUT UP, RAKUGO COMEDIAN!!
JUST GO SIT DOWN, LIKE YOUR RAKUGO SKITS
HURRY UP AND SIT DOWN
While trying to setup this scene
Gaki no Tsukai staff
sent out requests for any juicy information
and nobody but Osaka Honwaka TV's assistant producer
T/N: Osaka Honwaka TV is a variety show that airs on Sunday nights. Some big name comedians are on the show, but it's not nearly as popular as other big name varieties.
responded for a piece of garbage like you
You got no place to stick your nose in other's fights
Just how few goddamn connections do you have!?
Honwaka's assistant producer shared
this story with us
From Osaka Honwaka TV's Assistant Producer
Whenever we record with Hosei-san, we provide an
assortment of dishes a la carte for his catering needs, but
T/N: Hineri Age is a lightly fried rice cracker snack. Pretty plain and ordinary.
he eats nothing but Hineri Age snacks
Isn't that just the weakest excuse for a scoop!!
How the hell are you this boring that you only have this story?!
There's more from that assistant producer
From the same assistant producer
From Osaka Honwaka TV's Assistant Producer
He has a habit of writing things down so he doesn't
forget anything, but
since he writes with such huge letters
he has to replace his notebook every week
What's with this bullshit excuse for a story!
Even the assistant producer was struggling to write this shit
Hosei didn't even do anything bad
Right?
Nobody thought ill of you
Well then
are we gonna go at it or not, make up your mind!
What's holding you back? Let's go, ugly!
You're the one who's scared!
You two, the ones without any presence, could you stop them?
Absolutely no presence
Ah excuse me
Don't even bother getting up
You guys aren't successful enough to bother with
Isn't that a bit harsh?
Shut up divorcee combo
Couldn't help that one, eh?
Don't say it like that
Absolutely insane
Nothing?
Yeah really, nothing?
I feel a bit left out...
What're you gonna do bitch?
Hurry up and bring it!
Hey muscle head help me out here!
Excuse me-
SHUT UP, PROTEIN!!
Does anyone say that?
"Shut up, protein"?
Does anyone say that?
Protein!
Sit down protein!!
"Sit down protein!"
On your daughter's birthday
you tried to secretly buy her a handbag
and trying to get her to laugh, in that handbag
you put in your own action figure
She was so excited about the handbag
that she ignored your action figure
The biggest entertainment failure of the year
isn't going to come busting in here, dumbass!
Seriously, who told you that?
Then you went to Disneyland
and you bought a Mickey Mouse tank top
and went to the bathroom to change like a high school girl
Seriously!?
What's with this entertainer in drag, huh?
Honestly, I thought that would make me stand out less
Hey Waka,
you got a picture of that?
Yeah, I do
You thought that wouldn't stand out!?
He's totally a cross-dresser
That was only the first one
Don't be bringing down dream land!
It's obvious that it's you
You can see it
Why are you showing off your muscles while hiding your face?
Scary...
The delinquents are scary here
Alright let's get out of here, Waka
Please don't leave the picture behind
Amazing levels of aggression from that one
Only 30 minutes since starting
The five's tension
will only fall from here
A rush of punishments
The five's tension
will only fall from here
A rush of punishments
The five's tension
will only fall from here
A rush of punishments
The five's tension
will only fall from here
A rush of punishments
The five's tension
will only fall from here
and by no means
But more assassins await
are they letting up
and by no means
But more assassins await
are they letting up
and by no means
But more assassins await
are they letting up
Huh? Looks like we're stopping
Yeah really
They're working over there
Stopping in the peaceful countryside
A standup mic
Last year...
The people we hold in highest esteem is Downtown
We can't allow another relapse
Manzai is a challenging ordeal, a path of greatest resistance we chose
T/N: In the American Police Batsu, Chidori told a joke that no one laughed at.
A year since their tragic failing
This year, we'll absolutely make sure they laugh
The reborn Chidori has arrived
Gaki no Tsukai NEWS
False Charges
To be treated like a criminal on false pretexts
Haruna Kawaguchi as the falsely charged lawyer
A new Saturday drama
Falsely Charged Lawyer
A 15 minute extended debut special
Jan.19 at 10am
Innocence
A new Saturday morning drama begins
Kentaro Sakaguchi, Haruna Kawaguchi, Masao Kusakari, Naohito Fujiki
Innocence, The Falsely Charged Lawyer
The story of saving the innocent who face trumped up charges
A law-based entertainment drama
The reborn Chidori has arrived
Hello! Thanks for having us!
We are Chidori
When I get a vacation,
I'd like to take my family somewhere
Taking good care of your family
T/N: Ryokan is a traditional Japanese inn.
but I don't really know how to make reservations at a ryokan
That's easy though
Really?
All you have to do is call, I'll show you
Dialing: Beep boop beep boop, ring ring ring
Hello?
T/N: Hakubei is a character that Chidori uses in their skits. Hakubei is an elderly person that constantly misunderstands things.
This is the Kisuikan's head hostess, Hakubei
Hakubei? What an amazing name you have
It's spelled with the kanji Shiro (白) and Taira (平)
I don't really care about a name like that
I'd like to make a reservation for my family of three this weekend
Thank you very much
I'd like to confirm your reservation
Chiben Wakayama High School Baseball Club, 80 people
That's incorrect, you're mistaken
Would you be interested in our all-you-can-eat Chinese buffet?
No thanks, I don't want a Chinese buffet at a Japanese inn
A mistake?
Yes, a family of three
You're correct
Of course I am
I'm terribly sorry for the mistake
Uhh...
As an apology...
I'll upgrade your meals to the highest quality
Everyone's focused
I'd like to confirm your reservation again
Is he getting nervous?
Chiben Wakayama High School Baseball Club, 80 people
Yeah
NO! Forget it!
Thank you very much!
THEY DIDN'T LAUGH AT ALL!!
He stumbled a bit
They didn't laugh at even one joke!!
Something's off!!
What!
Your suit is way too huge!
Daigo's suit is too big
The reason they didn't get a laugh
Daigo's suit is too big
No it's not!
Yes it is
It's huge!
The size of your suit has no impact on the comedy!!
It's ridiculously big!
It was distracting
This isn't a size for a young man
That's just how suits are
That looks like the size of TOMMY's Masa-san
Doesn't matter if we wore Masa-san's size
So, let's go for tight
So if we change our suits it'd be fine
Let's go change!
No, that was Hamada
You laughed when he said Chiben Wakayama
That's not it
He didn't say Chiben Wakayama properly
Oh right, that's what it was
Seriously
So that was why?
It was because he flubbed his line
Hello!
Excuse us, let's begin
Excuse us, hello
You know, I want to go on a trip
Oh that's a nice idea
It's just that I don't know how to make a reservation
That's easy, all you do is call
Is that so?
Yeah, so here, let's try calling
Beep boop beep boop, ring ring ring
Hello, this is Kisuikan's head hostess, Hakubei
Whatever about your name, Hakubei
It's spelled with the kanji Shiro (白) and Taira (平)
I don't really care about the "Shiro" or "Taira"
I'd like to make a reservation for my family of three this weekend
Is that so? Then I'd like to confirm your reservation
Chiben Wakayama High School Baseball Club, 80 people
No, that's wrong!
Would you be interested in our all-you-can-eat Chinese buffet?
No, I don't need that! It's just for a family of three!
You're correct
My sincere apologies!
It's fine, please hurry it up
I'd like to confirm your reservation again
Chiben Wakayama High School Baseball Club, 80 people
No, forget it!
Thank you very much!
I TOLD YOU!!
What?!
Not ONE of those jokes landed
T/N: He's referring the the Buddhist prayer bead bracelet. A fashionable item that many people believe to have spiritual energy.
Because of your beads!!
That had nothing to do with it
You're emphasizing them too much!
What?
THE BEADS!
Reason the stand-up failed
The beads were too intense
They were a good luck charm, that's normal in comedy
What the hell was that?
They look like a wallet chain that hangs from your back pocket
I really hate thwose
What the hell is "thwose"?!
Let's calm down
We're messing up all of our words
The both of them are fumbling!
They are really working hard out there
Out the window, farmers at work
Hello! We are Chidori
You know, when you have a day off, you want to go somewhere, right?
That's true, that's true
T/N: The proper word is "ryokan".
But I just don't know how to book a ryokon
A "ryokon?"
Beep boop beep boop, ring ring ring
The third attempt was THIS?!
Hello, this is the Kisuikan's head hostess, Hakubei
Hakubei? What an amazing name you have
It's spelled with the kanji Shiro (白) and Taira (平)
I don't really care about the "Shiro" or "Taira"
Fu Ha Fu
Fu ha ha
Fu ha ha...
You may go ahead and laugh
Hold on, hold on!!
Look
A sudden fire!!
Wait!!
WAIT!!
Forget about your manzai for a minute!
Wait, behind you, hold on
Oh man, seriously
HEY~!
A field fire!
It's a field fire!
HEY, OLD GEEZER!
WE'RE TRYING TO DO STAND-UP!
HEY!
Did you light a goddamn tire on fire?!
This is a critical moment, what are ya doin'?!
The bucket...
Ma'am!
That bucket's not going to be enough
Ma'am!
Ma'am, run faster!
Are they gonna be okay?
This is ridiculous
No way, this is really...
With that bucket it's impossible.
CUT IT OUT!
What are they doing?
That surprised me!!
What the heck?
Ah, I guess Chidori is going to help out
Are you guys okay?!
Daigo really messed up his lines
He screwed up saying "ryokan"
What the hell were you burning to make this big ass fire?!
Why are they running away though?
Aren't they mad?
I guess?
Who knows
The long ride is almost at an end
The research institute is almost within view
We're almost there!
Are we?
Now, the five new recruits
can see the institute from the bus window
But this isn't the finishing line
A new battlefield awaits them
Oh, we're here!!
Finally...
The Heipo Foundation Archaeological Institute of Omame
The location this time:
An institute to find treasure and generate laughs
Assassins and fierce battles will soon appear...
An institute to find treasure and generate laughs
Assassins and fierce battles will soon appear...
Arrival at the research institute
Let's go
We're really here
Let's go, we're here
We made it
This is a statue of the founder of the institute, Heipo
I see
Isn't he cute?
Research Institute Founder
Heipo
Is "cute" the right word?
Isn't his face frickin' huge!?
It's pretty big. Let's go
3rd Floor Hallway
Here's the training room everyone
For now, wait here and
stand by for your instructions
Here it is...
Every single time...
Right?
Rookie Training Room
Always this feeling, always this layout...
This again...
Don't open the drawers yet
Alright
Yeah, we already know
There's all this stuff laying around, huh?
There is
Ah... It's really started
It's started alright
You're laughing!
When you said "It's really started" just now,
you were clearly laughing while saying it
No, I just said it cheerfully
No, I don't know, I wish things were a little more strict
If I did that, I'd definitely be out
Poot
Did you just fart?
He farted
He really farted
Huh?
You farted, asshole
Nuh-uh...
What was that?
One hour since the start
The five newbies finally get a break
Coming up...
the terrifying contents of the drawers awaits...
Research Institute - Time elapsed, 1 Hour
But before that, there's an important task
Listen up
Now, you're going to go meet the most respected person,
at the Director's Room to introduce yourselves
Ah, I remember this
The Archaeological Institute of Omame
New recruits must greet the director
Then that should've been the very first thing we do
Seriously
Right?
Yeah
The most respected person...
That's actually pretty rude
Right here, everyone
It was literally right next door
Excuse us!
What a nice room
What a huge room
Seriously
Director's Room
How classy
Alright
It was impossible to know who it was from behind
It really was
Director, I've brought the five new recruits
So, you've finally arrived
You're frickin' kidding me!
Director, I've brought the five new recruits
So, you've finally arrived
Director of the Research Department
Furutachi Ichiro
T/N: Furutachi Ichiro is a very famous announcer, tarento, presenter, and newscaster.
You're frickin' kidding me!!
The five men before me, let us share in this meeting
Today, New Years Eve in Japan, we will share this with the nation
The Director's Style of Greeting
Giving introductions like a reporter
Now, I will issue a challenge to each one of you
I will present these to you as the Director,
and I will take your laughter from you.
On this New Year's Eve, I want to
aim for the pinnacle of happiness
This was once Yamasaki Hosei,
a man obsessed with making people laugh with his stories.
It felt very sudden when he joined the Tsukitei group,
today being known as Tsukitei Hosei.
So now, putting the name of Tsukitei on the line,
with the prestige of Japan's Rakugo society on the line,
let's have a battle of riddles
It's very simple. Think of the name 'Furutachi Ichiro'
I'll repeat. Turn the name 'Furutachi Ichiro' into something funny
Now, let's begin, storyteller
Begin!
When I think of Furutachi Ichiro...
Um... The...
He's a... Major person
With that in mind... With Ichiro we are all Ichiro
You threw mud all over the face of your teacher with that garbage!
No good, that's scary, totally scary!
Wasn't that horrible?
That was no good
That was ridiculous
T/N: Karl Gotch was a professional Belgian wrestler who is known as "The God of Wrestling" in Japan due to his influence on Japanese professional wrestling.
The soldier appears, the Karl Gotch of comedy
T/N: "Tsukkomi" is the comedian who retorts and reacts to the "boke" who acts stupid and says ridiculous things.
A superb comedian with both talents in tsukkomi and boke, and a commentator on "Wide na Show"
The North Atlantic Treaty Organization of the comedy world
Matsumoto Hitoshi makes his appearance.
But who is this man?
Likely out of loneliness,
he's making a friend out of his own body,
by building up each cell in his muscles little by little,
creating the tough body he has now.
That's right, behind his laugh lies a vortex of muscle
a true culmination of his life's work.
I've decided to give you a word puzzle.
Let me ask you the question, and answer quickly:
What is a new smart phone app that absolutely no one would need?
It might be something fictional,
This was rough
or it might be something that already exists
This was crazy hard
What is a new smart phone app that absolutely no one would need?
Now, Matsumoto, your challenge begins
What is a new smart phone app that absolutely no one would need?
Begin!
A self-destruct feature
He just yelled "self-destruct feature"
So, the master of comedy
bombs sometimes too, huh?
This is impossible
And now I will decide on the anchor
Amazing, this is amazing
Here we have the peerless and aggressive comedian, who plays the straight man.
This person who has been called a roadside hyena, Hamada Masatoshi.
According to one theory, this man meets with friends night after night
such as with people like Yonekura Ryoko, or perhaps Yanagiba Toshiro
and Maekawa Kiyoshi.
It was rumoured he was able to nab explosive laughter from them by doing impressions.
T/N: Yonekura Ryoko is an actress, Yanagiba Toshiro is an actor, and Maekawa Kiyoshi is a singer. Basically, Hamada has big-name celebrity friends.
It was rumoured he was able to nab explosive laughter from them by doing impressions.
No, no, no
These rumours came in via Israel's intelligence agency Mossad.
I didn't do it
Well then, IKKO has been getting popular again so
let's have you challenge doing an impression of IKKO
Come on
Wow, how dirty
3 2 1 Start!!
What the hell~
T/N: IKKO is a stylist/make-up artist/tv personality who is famous for saying "dondake~" while waving a finger. "Dondake~" was nominated as a buzzword in 2007. It means, "How much?!" as a surprise reaction to something of a large amount or quantity.
How's that?
How was that?
Oh, I hear some laughter coming from part of the gallery
Yes, it was definitely funny.
But it did not reach the funny level you would call explosive
In this strange atmosphere that has arisen,
I wish to add some more color to this director room
I'll show you what real impressions look like
Come on out!!
What? What?
Well, well, well
Research Institute, Researcher
Hollywood Zakoshisyoh
T/N: Hollywood Zakoshisyoh is a comedian who has appeared in many dramas, variety shows, radio shows, and web series. His comedian name is inspired by Hollywood Hulk Hogan.
All right!
No way?!
All right!
Wait, seriously?!
Whoa...
You gotta be kidding
All right!
Director's style of greetings
He will show them what a real impression looks like
All right!
Right!
Well, shall we start?
First we'll do an overly exaggerated IKKO
Overly exaggerated
IKKO
Oh-oh-oh-oh
T/N: This is one of his signature lines.
Ghooos!!
What on earth?
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Ghooos!!
What's that?
What's he doing?
Are you serious?
Seriously
What are you doing?
Really, Furutachi-san, what are you doing?
What are you doing, seriously?
We'll move on to the next one. Next is this
T/N: They are doing an impression of the song, "PERFECT HUMAN" by RADIO FISH, a dance/vocal unit with the same members of comedy duo, Oriental Radio.
Let's go with overly exaggerated PERFECT HUMAN
Overly exaggerated
PERFECT HUMAN
T/N: "Nakata" is the name of one of the comedians in comedy duo Oriental Radio. He actually is singing the song.
Na ka ta! Na ka ta! Na ka ta!
I'mma perrrrfect human
Weeeeeeee
live in Tokyo
Na ka ta! Na ka ta!
I'mma perrrfect human
Ghooos!!
What the hell?
Na ka ta! Na ka ta! Na ka ta!
I'm a perrr
fect human
Weeee live in Tokyo
Na ka ta! Na ka ta! I'm a perrrfect
You're the director, right?
human
Thank you very much for watching
Ghooos!!
You're the director, right?
That's right
After you guys take this hit
I expect you to keep things exciting
Good luck!
Thank you very much
Thank you
Let's go
Wow, that was amazing...
He sure was energetic
That director..
It's supposed to be archaeology, but it's really lacking in that department
Completely lacking
We all got hurt
Thank you very much
Oh no, thank you very much
No need to show this scene!!
1 hour and 30 minutes since the start
It's time for the curtain to rise on that segment
Could learn from that
The drawers. Shouldn't we open them?
Shall we?
Right
You said it, finally
It's that time
No, but...
We should think about the order in which we open
There's no way there's nothing inside the drawers
Hamada, let's start from you
What?
Seriously?
This year's top batter is Hamada
How about starting from the top?
There are times when it gets scary
True, there's probably a pattern there. Quite traumatic
Ahh, there's stuff inside!!
Look, there's something in there right off the bat
Looks like some kind of ancient paper
Mysterious ancient manuscript and key
Whoa, whoa
What, what?
Seems it's only this paper and there's something written on it
What's this?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After opening the wall of heroes with the antique key
and proving your brave spirit via the devil's mouth
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A strong golden fortune will come to dwell within you
The keyhole lies beneath the Goddess statue
It's using rather difficult expressions
"Strong golden fortune"...
I think that's it
Hamada-san...
-----------
Goddess statue
Oh!
Is that it?
"A strong golden fortune will come to dwell within you"
What does that mean?
"A strong golden fortune will come to dwell"...
Huh? It's this one right?
Yes
Whaaaa!!
Urgh, it's scary!!
Scary
It's scary
Huh?
The Mouth of Truth
That's a "Mouth of Truth"
"Prove your brave spirit via the devil's mouth. A strong golden fortune will come to dwell within you"
It's "your brave spirit"!!
Oh! You're supposed to put your hand inside that?
Yeah
So that's how it is
Scary!
However, only Hamada can do it
Yes
That's right
What!! Why is this first?
Scary, scary...
A strong golden fortune will dwell within you
What if I get an electric shock or something like that...?
I don't think there will be such childish tricks
like electric shocks given this elaborate set-up
Really?
Yeah
You just have to do it
Right, you just have to do it
Ahh... This is scary
It's scary
This is seriously scary
Scary
What should I do!!
Scary, scary
Do you hear a "sa sa sa" kind of sound?
Is it his hand making that sound?
Near the Mouth of Truth
Wah, wah, his hand went in
What's this?
Wait, what's this?
I can feel a liquid flowing
A mysterious liquid is on his hand
Liquid is flowing?
What is this?
Take your hand out
Some kind of liquid?
Something's on my hand but what is it?
Urgh it smells!!
It smells so badly!
It smells!!
Ah, so smelly!!
Really stinky!!
What do you mean by smelly?
It really smells
What? What?
What the hell?
It really is quite smelly
What's that smell?
But Matsumoto-san, we don't know what smell it is
It's certainly smelly though
What's that smell?
It stinks!!
What kind of smell is this?
What's this?
It smells
It's like, well...
It can't be a smell from the crotch area, right?
What is it then?
I think, perhaps, it might be...
Isn't it poop?
Pfft!!
No, I don't think that's right?
But
It's true!
Right, I get it
Yeah
It's "A strong golden fortune" so... It's the smell of poop
T/N: The Japanese word for fortune is "un" while the word for poop is "unko". So this is a play on words.
The smell of poop now dwells on Hamada
Horrible
T-There's poop on that hand right?
I really hate this
What on earth are they doing?
There's poop on Hamada-san's hand
That's a bad way of phrasing things
This is horrible, really
Really
smelly!!
I want to wipe it off, I want to wipe it off...
This is bad. You should go wash it off
It smells!
There's... Um...
Air freshener!!
That's right, there's air freshener
Oh, I see
Once I wipe my hand, spray this
That's...
Spray that hand of his that's holding poop...
I'm not holding poop
What are you doing, spraying so much...
He used the air freshener to drench my hand...
Hamada, it's because you smell of poop
No, no, no
This is the worst
How is it now?
He's sprayed my hand so I'm going to wipe it now
Someone open their drawers next
Whaaat?
This is really messed up
Yeah, it's quite messed up
It was actually poop
Using poop on New Year's eve...
Using tricks like that...
That's a bit much
Shall I go next?
Go on
I'll start opening
Aren't you going to do PERFECT HUMAN?
No, it's fine
Oh?
Hey
Something's gonna appear
Scary
There's something!
Mysterious DVD
It's appeared!
DVD?
A DVD over in Endo's drawers...
Tanaka usually gets the DVDs right?
My drawers only had this
Whaat?
The DVDs always led to Thai Kicks for me, but it might happen to Endo this time
9 years in a row, DVDs gave him
Thai Kicks
Hotel
Spy
Airport
Teacher
EDF
Prison
Detective
Scientist
Police
Isn't it better if you do your impression of PERFECT HUMAN?
No, I won't do PERFECT HUMAN
What are we doing about that? Or should we take a look at Tanaka's drawers?
Having DVDs in his drawers isn't impossible
That's right, because that's how it is
Seems complicated
I'll just take a look
I'll open my drawers
Perhaps there will be different things in his drawers
If there's no DVD, that brings up a lot of questions, but if there is a DVD, then that's also...
Ahh!!
It's here
Whoa, whoa!
DVD!
Mysterious DVD
There was a DVD inside
But there's no numbers or anything so
The DVDs are not in order, right?
It doesn't matter which goes first
Right, right
What does it mean?
They might not be related
Whoa!
Huh?!
A letter...
Mysterious envelope
Wow, it's thick
Seems here's quite a number of things inside
Yeah, looks like there's a lot of things inside
Huh? No way!
Oh, there's nothing in here
Why's this empty!!
He just laughed
I didn't laugh!
Every time...
Wait, what are we gonna now?
Yeah, really
That's amazing
What should we do?
Wait, just... What should we do with these, I wonder?
Endo, isn't it better if you do your PERFECT HUMAN -----------------Linebreak----------------------------------------------------- impression now?
For the moment
PERFECT HUMAN...
Seriously, seriously
3 2 1 Go!!
Na ka ta! Na ka ta! Perfect Human!
GHOOIIIS!!
It's weird that I get an "OUT"
I definitely shouldn't be out
Your laugh is different than that
Yes
That's not how I laugh...
That was a permissible laugh
It wasn't a laugh, more like smiling from embarrassment
Shall we go from Endo?
Yes, one by one
Sure
Right
We'll go in order
There will be too many items
Wait, either way
Yeah
There really are a lot
I'm not sure how to break it up
Oooh no
No no no, it's DVD, oh no
Right? It used to be magazines
Right?
Yeah...
I'm scared...
Thai kicks are the worst...
Appearance OK Derby
We had this last year too
Will celebrities dress up and perform for us?
Their reactions will be recorded by hidden cameras
Who will they dress up as!?
T/N: Yancy and Mariconne are comedians who are known for their dancing and guitar-based skits.
Yancy & Mariconne
Here's the bit they'll perform
Ready?
Limbo dance under the guitar challenge
Look
1, 2, 3
Yes
LIMBO!!
That's bad
LIMBO!!
The guitar hit her breasts, so she's mad
T/N: Their skit is a combination of English and Japanese. "Oppai" is Japanese for "boobs" and "pai" is the shortened version. They are not saying, "You touch my pie."
You touch my 'oob!
No touch your 'oob!
You touch 'oob!
No touch 'oob!
You touch 'oob!
No touch 'oob!
You touch 'oob!
No touch 'oob!
You touch my 'oob!
LIMBO!!
Will be playing the role of Mariconne
After seeing the rhythmic limbo dance
They'll really do this?
We will have them play the role of Mariconne
Three celebrities have entered the race!
Three celebrities have entered this race!
Who will consent to this performance!?
So, who will consent to this performance?
Who will it be?
Welcome
First up is
Thank you for coming
Thanks for having me
Who?
Thank you
Fumie Hosokawa
Her 1990
Debut
In 1990
She debuted wielding her F-cup bust
F-cup
bust
A big boob idol originator
As an originator of big boob idols
She led the world of gravure
Right right right
The number of times her photos have been published-
Her published photos number over 1 million!
is over 1 million!
Even now, she has an impeccable figure
Fumie Hosokawa's appearance negotiation!
We will negotiate her appearance!
Have you ever worked with Downtown?
Yes, I think so
Looks like she's gotten thinner
What are your thoughts on Tsukitei Hosei?
Hosei is-
Since he was in a duo with Hiromitsu Noriyasu,
Yes yes yes
Fumie remembers very well
Yeah
While he was on the radio for Young Town,
Oh, that's right
While he was on the radio for Young Town,
There was a time he took care of me
When I was young, Noriyasu-san was my crush
Eh?
What made you laugh?
The lady beside her...
Watch her
I saw her too
I blocked her so I wouldn't look
You get it
The manager-looking lady?
Yes
Look Here
When I was young, Noriyasu-san was my crush
No no no no
No way
I saw it by accident...
That's no good, seriously...
She was probably...
Come on
She was surprised
You don't have to say that!!
Yes, please don't do that
"Why are you laughing?" was your question
When I was young, Noriyasu-san was my crush
How many times are we going to watch this?
When I was young, Noriyasu-san was my crush
This
Has nothing to do with anything at all!
Completely unrelated
Unrelated, right?
Well, that's
The focus is wrong!!
Oh come on
Moving on
Now the question we've been wanting to ask
Hosokawa, as an assassin of laughter, would you
Please dress up and perform for us?
I love it! Doing that stuff!!
Cut that out of the frame!!
Cut it out!
No!
Put a paper over that half!!
Cover it with paper
Give me a break already
Why would you even film her?
Just
(The monitor) Cover it with paper, please!!
We don't need to see all of her reactions!
Ahh
It's all Hamada's fault for pointing it out in the first place, if he hadn't we wouldn't be out
That's right
The part you'd be playing is this...
You touch 'oob!
No touch 'oob!
You touch 'oob!
No touch 'oob!
You touch 'oob!
No touch 'oob!
You touch my 'oob!
LIMBO!
What do you think?
I'm worried about what people will think
Negotiation Complete
That's fair
Hello
Good morning
Our next negotiation is with this person
It's her
Thanks for having me
Mika Ahn
Her Paris Fashion Week debut at 20 years old!
At the age of 20, she had her Paris Fashion Week debut!
Fashion Brand Producer
Producing her own fashion brand
She sells it on her infomercial programs
In a single day her sales are hundreds of millions of yen!
In a single day she sells for hundreds of millions of yen!
The queen of TV shopping
The queen of producing
The queen of TV shopping
The queen of producing
She does what she wants
What's your impression of Downtown?
Well, that's-
Since I can remember, I grew up in Kansai
My hometown was like a sister city to theirs, too
I see
I love them, they're like lovable big brothers
How do you feel about Tsukitei Hosei-san?
Well, uh
I worked with him for a Kansai-based online shopping program
His face was so small and so dang cute
His face was so small and so dang cute, and I like otaku types
T/N: "Otaku" refers to geeky/nerdy people who are very obsessed with a particular hobby. People tend to associate otakus with anime, but it can be any hobby.
He seems like the type to collect all sorts of stuff, right?
Milk caps for instance
At last, the question
This is who you would play
Oh looks cute~
Would you watch this clip once?
Oh okay so
Where will she limbo? Under the guitar?
You touch my 'oob!
LIMBO!
What is this!!
We would like you to just do the dancing, if possible...
Just? Just...
Since I produce many kinds of products
I have to be careful not to affect the product's image
Negotiation Complete
Of course
Our next negotiation is with this person
Thank you for coming
Yes
It's her!
Tomoko Fujita
1988 TV miniseries
Non-chan's Dream
At 23 years old
In 1988
Her amazing debut on the NHK morning drama,
Non-chan's Dream, launched her career
Making It Through
Playing Nagako
Over 20 years
After that, in the national drama
"Making It Through"
That's right
she played the Okakura house's fifth daughter, Nagako
for over 20 years
Since her debut, she's worked in dramas, movies, and theater
Tomoko Fujita's appearance negotiations!
This is the character
Do you know it?
I'm not familiar, I'm sorry
Who's doing it?
The video reveals the joke
She reviews the video
You touch my 'oob!
No touch your 'oob!
That's not limbo though
Really?
This version of the limbo isn't what you expected?
Not at all!!
It's kind of perverted
Since it's perverted, I'm not sure...
I'm not sure...
What to do...
Negotiation Complete
The one taking on the role of Mariconne
Who will it be!?
Endo-san, please tell us who it will be within 5 seconds!
Ah!
That's what it's about
If Endo gets this wrong it'll be trouble
It will be Mika Ahn
Mika Ahn
Wooo yeah yeah yeah yeah!
The correct answer is revealed
Thank you! Yeah yeah yeah yeah!
Yancy
Shinya Matsuura
We are Yancy aaaaannnnnndddd
Mika Ahn
T/N: She's pronouncing her name as "Mikannu" to sound similar with the Japanese pronunciation of Mariconne, which is "Marikonnu".
Oh you were right
I was
Everybody! Do you like limbo?
That's a lot of makeup...
Anmicanne
Mika Ahn
Oh wow
She's really going for it
What happened?
What are you doing?
You touch my 'oob!!
No touch your 'oob!!
You touch my 'oob!
No touch your 'oob!
You touch my 'oob!
No touch your 'oob!
You touch my 'oob!
No touch your 'oob!
You touch my 'oob!!
LIMBO!!
Amazing
It's really good actually!!
It's too good
Amazing
Let's try again!
Fumiennu
Fumie Hosokawa
Fumiennu~♥
LIMBO!!
Oh it's like that
NEXT STAGE!!
No, up!!
She called in backup!
No, up!!
Don't touch my 'oob
She demands he raise the guitar
She jumped and hit her breasts
You touch my 'oob!!
Jumping 'oob!!
'oob!!
Jumping 'oob!!
'oob!!
You touch my 'oob!
Jumping 'oob!
You touch my 'oob!
Jumping 'oob!
You touch my 'oob!
Jumping 'oob!
You touch my 'oob!!
LIMBO!!
Let's try again!
Unexpectedly, they all agreed
Tomoconne
Tomoko Fujita
Next stage
Come on!
My hip boom boom boom
Passing with the hips strategy
Not my 'oob
GOOD IDEA YAAY!!!
So....
Ready 1 2 3 LIMBO
Boom boom boom
Be careful
Boom boom boom boom be careful
Her boobs end up hitting it
You touched my 'oob
You touch my 'oob!
At the end she walked into it with her boobs !!
Rolling 'oob! Rolling 'oob!
You touch 'oob
Rolling 'oob
You touch 'oob
Rolling 'oob
'oob 'oob 'oob
'oob 'oob 'oob 'oob Limbo!
Amazing...
'oob 'oob 'oob
Boing boing boing
Boom boom boom boom
They sure practiced this
'oob 'oob 'oob 'oob boing boing boing boing boom boom boom boom
It was all of them
I don't think anyone would've guessed it right
Not for sure, man...
We've had the Appearance OK Derby since last year
We have, we have
Matsumoto still hasn't checked
Either Tanaka deals with his first or Matsumoto checks his drawer
How about it?
Shall I open the drawers?
There are two left though
There's nothing inside
There's nothing inside...
Really?
Both?
This one's the last
Then it's got to be that one
Ahh...
Of course, there it is
There's no way there's nothing
There's quite a lot in there
This looks complicated
Yes, it does
It looks kind of difficult doesn't it?
Ugh, what is this?
First off, this
A switch
And then this
Glasses
What is this... Bobbed hair
A bobbed hair wig
A letter
T/N: Hyokkorihan is a comedian whose gag is to do a peek-a-boo style joke where he hides his face behind something to the timing of his song and then reveals his face.
Hyokkorihan Set
This is a funny set that will
allow you to become Hyokkorihan
Ah, you're so lucky
There are 3 options: one time, three times, and seven times
It will not stop until the person using the set will make people within the room laugh.
This is hell
Eh? I have to do this? Me?
Yes
Of course
But if we laugh it'll be over right away
If you skillfully make us snicker
snicker
If you skillfully make us snicker
Because we're allies after all
There isn't a good place to do this though
Yeah
I guess over there is fine
Please make a decision
Facing back and then turning towards us or anything works
I'll do it outside then
Endo can you push the one time button?
Sure. Just the one time?
Yeah, will you push the one time button?
Alright, got it
The first attempt is important
The first attempt is important, yeah?
The freshness
If you're done preparing, just let us know
I'm ready
Here we go!
This is when we should all cooperate together...
Was it really that unfunny?
Maybe it's cause we couldn't really see your face
It would've been better if you'd show off more
Yeah this direction
Understood
Then, I'll do it three times
With just one time I couldn't really get the timing
Yeah, that figures
Yeah, yeah yeah
The face is important, the face
Since it's the same pattern
Okay, here we go
What?
Man, I didn't do anything bad though
You're laughing aren't you
This means I made someone laugh, right?
This is wrong though
No, no, no
What do you mean?
No, we laughed at something else
If we don't laugh during Hyokkori Han, it doesn't count
Is it even possible to get it right?
Should we try seven times?
No, no no
With Hyokkori Han...
Hamada-san, you could do it just by wearing the glasses
I'm not wearing this wig to be like Hyokkori Han
Yeah, but using the door is the correct way, right?
Why do I have to do this, it's Matsumoto's thing isn't it?
It's just seven times
Seven times is impossible though
You just do the Hyokkori face reveal
But I didn't have confidence doing it seven times either
The three times one almost got me though
Oh really?
So you gotta do it right
Sit down, sit down...
What a jerk
Hey, make the noise!!
I was waiting forever!
Seriously, such a jerk
You're right
My bad, my bad
It suits you doesn't it
It so totally suits you
What the hell are you guys doing?
I'm on standby reluctantly
Hey Endo, go and fix up his bowtie
Your bowtie is off
That's right... it's important
That's very important
Okay, it's all good now
But you're starting to really look the part
Wish I could've seen it for the first time in action
It really suited him
What a jerk
Tsk!!
Make the noise!!
The way you came out was just like Hyokkori Han
You're doing the Hyokkori Han
You're doing the real thing
But maybe it's a bit off
But should the DVD go first or the envelope?
This really doesn't feel like a letter
Let's take a look shall we?
Yeah, well of course
If we don't deal with it
This is a bit heavy
There's cards...
What?
Isn't this a tarot card set?
Mysterious cards
Are there instructions?
No, there aren't
Nothing, not even a letter
Then, the DVD!!
Do these go together then?
Yeah cause with just that you can't understand
Yeah, you're right. I don't get this by itself
I can't figure this out, what is this?
From the drawer, these cards!
Tanaka approaches the Thai Kick,
fair and square!
Instead of making it unreasonable, Tanaka will approach the Thai kick, fair and square
Using five cards
this will be a psychological warfare card battle!
These cards taken from the drawer!
Tanaka approaches the Thai Kick,
fair and square!
Instead of making it unreasonable, Tanaka will approach the Thai kick, fair and square
Using five cards
this will be a psychological warfare card battle!
The opponent and Tanaka will wage war with these 5 cards
Within those cards, there are 4 safe cards and 1 out card
There are 4 safe cards and 1 out card, for a total of 5 cards
First, the opponent selects a card, either safe or out
The first to put down a card is the opponent
Keep the card facing down and place it on the field
Then Tanaka follows by selecting a card and placing it on the field
The possible combinations are:
Safe and safe
Safe and out
Out and out
3 possibilities
First, in the case of safe and safe
If both cards are safe
It's a draw
Continuing from there
From the remaining 4 cards, the game continues to the next round
From the remaining cards, the game continues to the next round
Next, if someone puts down an out card, ending in a safe and out card
If one card is an out regardless of who put it down, in that case
This means Tanaka wins
Tanaka's victory!
Thai kick completely avoided!
No Thai kick for Tanaka and the game is over!
But the problem is...
If it's out and out!
If it's an out and out case
This means the opponent wins
The opponent's victory
Tanaka loses
Thai kick is the punishment
And he gets a Thai kick as the punishment
But this is...
The chances are slim
Yeah, they are
The opponent puts the card out first
But only in the case that both use an out card, will there be a Thai kick
Tanaka has the overwhelming advantage
Reading and predicting your opponent's card order
Key Point
Reading the opponent's mind
And predicting when they'll play the out card is the key!
The opponent in this competition is...
Thai
Kick Boxer
Thai
Kick Boxer
Thai
Kick Boxer
One month ago
Around a month ago,
In order to prepare for this game, he asked for an expert
DaiGo?
This man knows everything about the human mind
A mentalist?
T/N: They say DaiGo is a "mentalist", which really means he's a magician.
DaiGo, the mentalist who can grasp your thoughts!
You start by taking the 2 cards
Interpreter
Begin training with the mentalist
With the help of an interpreter, he starts training
At first they train with two cards
They start with two cards
There
The main thing to think about is if I'll put down a 2 again or if I'll change my mind. Have to consider these options
The main thing to think about is if I'll put down a 2 again
or if I'll change my mind. Have to consider these options
Gaze
Eye movement
Gestures
Your gaze, how your eyes move
The key to this battle is to grasp your opponent's heart
The path to victory lies in understanding your enemy
The hell is this
One week has passed
Since their training started,
One week has passed since they started training
We're upping the difficulty today
Instead of two cards, we'll try it with three this time
They switch to three cards in their training
Reveal
He's really desperate to beat you, Tanaka
Increasing the difficulty
Just by increasing the number of cards, you can increase the difficulty
What's important is to look at your opponent in the eyes and pressure them
Like, "I can see through you" or something like that
Cool to see this
As he corners Tanaka's mind, he raises his advantage
He can't make any mistakes in cornering Tanaka's mind
Yeah but it's all to beat me...
He's revealing this to me
And he works on raising his chances of winning
They want to show off his skills
Practice continues daily
His long practice sessions continue
The fruits of his labors start to become apparent
Since starting the training
Three weeks have passed
At the three week mark since starting the training...
It really takes that long, huh
Sweet
Well done!
Three cards
perfect result
And if you throw the last card, it's your win
He's a lot better than I thought he would be
The one who understands his enemy's mind completely
Thai Kick Boxer
He's completely grasped his opponent's thoughts
At this point, the number of cards doesn't matter
Seriously?
I think he'll do better than we thought
Probably, he won't even have to try hard to win
In the end, he's almost unbeatable
He has a 92.3% success rate
What is even going on?
He's already reached the top, I think
Ending up with a perfect score, he has no weakness
The strongest mentality with no weakness!
This is kinda like magic?
Battle
So their battle begins!
Well, here we are
And there he is!
But this time, Tanaka's
Got a chance
Let's begin!
T/N: The "-sama" suffix is used for important and respected people. In this context, they're treating Tanaka and Thai Kick as honored contestants.
Tanaka-sama
Thai Kick-sama
Please take a seat
It'll be fine!
As long as we both don't put down the OUT card then all other combinations are safe, right?
They've always been too unreasonable
This time they're playing a fair game it seems
What are the chances here?
Seems like it's high. But Thai Kick's at a 92% win rate
It'll be fine!
He's staring like crazy
And now, the Thai Kick psychological warfare card battle!
First, both contestants, please select your first card
You have a look on your face like you know you're going to get kicked
Think about it...
Ever since you started, he's been staring at you
First, Thai Kick-sama will lay down his card
Thai Kick
And now, Tanaka-sama, please place your card
Tanaka
And now, to reveal the cards
First, Tanaka-sama's card
Reveal!
He chose the Safe card
And now for Thai Kick-sama's card
Safe card
If his card is also Safe, they both discard and move to the next turn
it's a draw
However, if his card is the Out card
Out card
In that case,
You will be spared from the Thai Kick
Tanaka's win
Do your best!
That said,
Thai Kick-sama's card...
Go with "Out"!
Reveal!
It's a draw so they continue onward
Well, that's alright
The outcome was Safe-Safe
I see...
Well it's only the first one
That's true
Tanaka's face keeps getting weirder
Onward, to the second turn
He's being driven into a corner
Thai Kick-sama, if you will
Put down your card
Thai Kick
And now
Tanaka-sama, put down your card
Tanaka
And now, I will reveal the cards
Reveal!
Safe card
Don't you think he's being timid?
And next, Thai Kick-sama
Your card...
Reveal!
It's a draw so they continue onward
The cards were Safe-Safe
This is bad, you're down to 3 now
Now, the third turn will begin
Thai Kick-sama, please put down your card
If Tanaka loses this, he can't complain much
Hell is with that face
If Tanaka loses this, he can't complain much
Thai Kick
Second, Tanaka-sama, please put down your card
This is excruciating
He's hesitating, right
Don't waver now!
Dude, you can't tell by looking so hurry up...
Yeah he didn't train like Thai Kick did
Don't try to look cool
Tanaka
Here we go, let's check the cards
Reveal!
Safe again...
I see
That's what you did...
Safe card
And now
Go with the Out, come on
Thai Kick-sama's card
Reveal!
It's a draw so they go onward
They both played the Safe Card
This is amazing
And with the end of this turn
Oh no
We now enter the last turn
Ah! The last turn is here!
At this time, if they choose different cards,
Tanaka will be able to avoid the Thai Kick!
Great duel so far, eh?
Let's begin the last turn
At this point, you really
Thai Kick-sama, your card
can't let yourself be driven into a corner
Yeah, you really shouldn't. Should've gone for it sooner
Your face keeps getting weirder, Tanaka!
Do your best! Fight!
Thai Kick
What are you even looking at?
Then again, he didn't do any training at all
Tanaka
This is the decisive one
You'll be fine if it's not the same
Now, let us reveal the cards
First, Tanaka-sama's card
Reveal!
I get why you'd want to throw that card here
Next, Thai Kick-sama's card
Reveal!
Yeeeeeeeeees!
Out-Safe cards!
Tanaka wins! He avoids the Thai Kick!!
I did it!
Yeah!!
I totally thought he'd lose there
YES!
That was close!
I made it!
That was amazing!
He's going back!
YES!
Awesome!
I thought that would be the best time to play the Out
Awesome
From the drawer, these cards!
Instead of making it unreasonable
Tanaka will approach the Thai kick, fair and square
Using 4 cards, this will be a psychological warfare card battle!
Four cards psychological warfare card battle
His opponent will be...
Thai
Kick Boxer
Thai
Kick Boxer
Battle
The fight begins!
You already fought him though?
No no no
This is wrong, we just did this!
He returns like nothing happened
Like nothing happened...
No no no, we... Just now...
C'mon I already won!
These guys are acting like nothing happened
So, Tanaka-sama, please take a seat
No but, I already, before...
Do your best
Do your best, Tanaka!
But I avoided the kick already, right?
You can do it
Now then
The number is lower than before
Three Safe Cards
I see
Just one Out Card
The number went down by one eh?
Give Thai Kick-sama his cards
That means this fight will be over faster
No, I already won earlier
You say "Earlier," but I don't really understand
The first challenge
The preparations are complete
You understand, right?
Here's your chance!
Begin the Thai Kick psychological card battle
Get it done in 1 round so just make up your mind
Thai Kick-sama
Your first card, if you please
Thai Kick
Next, Tanaka-sama, your first card, please
Tanaka
This isn't right though
The cards have been chosen, I'll check them now
Card...
Reveal
He's on the attack
He attacked
I just avoided it, but you know
Here we go
Don't talk about the past
Good luck
Thai Kick's card...
He's staring so intensely
Reveal
Tanaka wins! Thai Kick avoided!!
The out card beats the safe card, saving Tanaka!
That was good
Nice job, Tanaka!
Thank you very much, thank you
That was perfect!
He's going home
Good, good
I knew you could do it!!
That was great!
Before, I avoided the kick with the 5-card battle, right?
I mean, Tanaka...
Let's not mention that anymore
Exactly
Let's not mention that anymore
You avoided it, so
Look
Look, look
Instead of making it unreasonable
Now it'll be 3 cards
Tanaka will approach the Thai kick, fair and square
3 cards, right?
Using 2 cards, this will be a psychological warfare card battle!
2 cards psychological warfare card battle
3 card battle, oh it's 2 now
The opponent is...
Who's he gonna play against?
"Who am I gonna play?"
Yeah
Thai
Kick Boxer
Always this guy
Thai
Kick Boxer
Thai
Kick Boxer
It's always this guy
Battle
Battle, battle
This is it, Tanaka
No, not "this is it"
Nothing you can do about it
Wait
If you win this time you'll definitely be fine
Huh!?
Oh yea...
Suspicious glasses & earphones
I will be the officiator for this battle this afternoon
Let's have a good clean battle
Is this guy alright?
Alright then, Tanaka-sama
Ha Ha Ha...
Once you look at him...
It's just...
Right?
He still might be able to win, you know?
There's...
There's still a chance
Uhhh, huh?
So harsh
You don't know yet
Huh?
Good luck
I don't know...
You can do it
Good luck!
But...
Protect yourself
But I already won twice...
Don't lose
Focus, you can do it
You can win!
First off, both of you
Choose the first card you will place
What was all that training for?
Choose the first card you will place
Good point
Just focus
Alright, now first Tanaka-sama
Tanaka goes first this time for some reason
Tanaka
You got this
He's so slithery
Next,
Thai Kick-sama, place your card
Thai Kick
What was the training for?
Exactly
It's ok
You still got this
It's still anyone's game!!
You got this, Tanaka
Thai Kick-sama, please check your card one more time
This is...
Is that your final choice?
Thai Kick-sama's card is an OUT card
If Tanaka's is an OUT card, he will receive a Thai kick
Now, for Tanaka's card
Just end it
REVEAL!
Out, out!
Thai kick confirmed!
TANAKA LOSES
You were so close!
This is ridiculous, it's unfair
It's unfair, wait a second
Isn't this a little harsh?
Well I mean...
It's unreasonable
There's nothing you can do about it now
This is unjust
This is wrong
This is the
harshest Thai kick I've ever had to take
You have to stick your butt out more
You'll get hurt
Stick your butt out
Woah
OUCH OWIE!!
UWA
OUCH OWIE!!
AHHH
What's wrong with him
What the hell
Jeez, don't be so loud
I know it hurts, but come on
Man that hurts
OOOOOOWAAAAAAAAA!!
But seriously,
You can't completely call that unreasonable
Exactly
Why is that?
At the end...
That was impossible
That's not true
There's gotta be some kind of proof
There must be a mark or something on it
Really?
Where?
There must be
There has to be a mark that shows it's OUT somewhere
He looked at it like this
You can't accuse him of that
No way, that was suspicious
He was wearing those glasses
Those were reading glasses
Man, that pisses me off
2 and a half hours since starting
The new recruits have no time to rest
Everyone listen up
We're gonna go to a treasure hunter's recreational bonding tournament
Here we go
Can you guys change and get ready?
His energy is the worst part
Bonding between treasure hunters
Recreational participation!!
It's in a gym
I left my allergy nasal-spray back in the room, idiot
Listen up
Auditorium
Ok
During the recreation tournament you can laugh, so
During the tournament laughing is OK!
Special Rule
How are we gonna have fun
Here we go
The energy levels in here
Mami Sugino
Chihara Junior
(Nippon TV Announcer)
ASSISTANT
New recruit bonding event!
Treasure Hunter Recreational Tournament!
TREASURE HUNTER
RECREATIONAL TOURNAMENT
Good energy!
First is Captain Miyasako's team
Team Miyasako
T/N: Miyasako is a comedian from the Ameagari Kesshitai comedy duo. He's also acted in quite a few movies and TV shows.
What do you think about your teamwork?
So energetic
I brought all of my closest friends
Right, right
Good luck to you
Now we have Fujimon's team
Team Fujimon
T/N: "Fujimon" is a nickname for Fujimoto, a comedian in the Fujiwara comedy duo. He has appeared in many Japanese TV shows.
Love chu~
Love chu~, guys
What do you think, captain?
I mean,
we're all really close with each other
Then kiss him, please!!
What!?
Why do I have to kiss him?
You guys are close, right?
Kiss...
They're such good friends!
Kasuga, who are you the closest with?
Me?
It's Hamada
Why is it me?
But Kasuga,
I heard you're really close with Junior
Oh yea!
With Junior?
I'm close with Junior too
Oh really
Right?
Alright, then let's see you and Junior...
Prove your friendship!
No way
This has nothing to do with anything, but do it
Are you sure?
Show us
I've heard it's sweet
Do it like you always do
Alright, well then
Here we go
Do it like you usually would
Oh my god
Thanks for that treat!!
They're so close!
That looked like their first kiss
I thought you guys were supposed to be close!
We are!
Captain Miyasako Hiroyuki
Captain Fujimon Toshifumi
License: Inomoto
MIYASAKO
Audrey: Kasuga
Matsumoto Hitoshi
License: Fujiwara
Tanaka Naoki
Nakao Akiyoshi
Tsukitei Hosei
LOTTi: Nakaoki
FUJIMON
Hamada Masatoshi
Endo Shozo
Murakami Kanako
Watanabe Natsuna
Tsukitei Hosei
Captain Miyasako Hiroyuki
Hamada Masatoshi
Audrey: Kasuga
License: Inomoto
Nakao Akiyoshi
Watanabe Natsuna
Captain Fujimon Toshifumi
Matsumoto Hitoshi
License: Fujiwara
LOTTi: Nakaoki
Endo Shozo
Murakami Kanako
MIYASAKO
FUJIMON
Tanaka Naoki
Captain Miyasako Hiroyuki
Hamada Masatoshi
Tanaka Naoki
Audrey: Kasuga
License: Inomoto
Nakao Akiyoshi
Watanabe Natsuna
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Tsukitei Hosei
License: Fujiwara
LOTTi: Nakaoki
Endo Shozo
Murakami Kanako
MIYASAKO
FUJIMON
Captain Fujimon Toshifumi
The 5 new recruits are split up into two teams
The fierce competition starts now!
'Answer Creatively' Made-Up Insult Improv!
ANSWER WITH YOUR IMAGINATION!
IMPROV!
Made-Up Insults!
Oh wow
I'm ready!
A unique imagination is required
to be a treasure hunter
In this challenge you will show us your creative skills
as much as you can
Now I will explain the rules
Please do!
Showcased before on Gaki no Tsukai,
It's comedian Zenta Miyatake's
'Made-Up Insults! Homage Game'
Zenta Miyatake's Own Original Example
First, let's take a look at an example from the originator
Would you please show us an example?
I made up an insult about a certain celebrity, here it is
Really
Ya~i Ya~i
T/N: Aoyama Thelma is a part Japanese, part Trinidadian R&B pop singer who is famous for the song "Soba ni Iru ne" which held the record for best selling digital download single in Japan.
Thelma Aoyama's apartment's garbage dump
smells really bad
That's just insulting
So just come up with made-up insults like that
This is gonna be hard
Use Your Imagination! Improv Made-Up Insults!
Make up an insult about the given celebrity
Kunikazu Katsumata
Ya~i!
Keeping the rhythm, the players will make up an insult
Ya~i!
Kunikazu Katsumata's
shoes are always untied!
Dave Spector
Ya~i!
They will go in order, and if they say an actual insult
Dave Spector eats
his lunch in the bathroom!
Say a real insult or lose the beat and you're out
or fail to keep up with the rhythm, they will be out
PIIIIII!
OUT!
Miyasako
Kasuga
Nakao
Tanaka
Natsuna
FIRST UP
MIYASAKO
First up is Team Miyasako. They will perform the challenge in this order
Let's get started, everyone ready?
Improv Made-Up Insult Game, start!
I'm scared
Improv Made-Up Insult Game, start!
Pinko Izumi
T/N: Pinko Izumi is a very famous and respected actress and singer who has been in several TV shows and movies.
Whenever Izumi Pinko sees a panda, she pees herself
Pinko Izumi
Fuyuki Moto
T/N: Fuyuki Moto is another famous actor who has also done some voice acting work.
Fuyuki Moto looks so ugly while sprinting
That's a good one!
That's a proper insult!!
Fuyuki Moto
Haruna Ai
T/N: Haruna Ai is a popular TV tarento and singer and is a transgender. She was the first Japanese contestant to win Miss International Queen transgender beauty pageant in Thailand.
Haruna Ai is on her 5th week of constipation
That's a great delusion!
Celebrity name
Lady Gaga
Lady Gaga's clothes never match the season
I guess, yeah,
I guess, yeah, for sure
Lady Gaga
Ikkokudo
T/N: Ikkokudo is a famous ventriloquist who specializes in imitations with a variety of different dolls with different personas.
Ikkokudo is always calling his mother for 2 hours
Good! Good! Good!
Ikkokudo
Yayoi Kusama
T/N: Yayoi Kusama is a famous contemporary artist and you may recognize her modern pumpkin art.
Yayoi Kusama gets itchy when seeing a praying mantis
What is that supposed to mean?
Yayoi Kusama
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Matsumoto gets diarrhea whenever he drinks protein
That's an insult!
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Junichi Ishida
T/N: Junichi Ishida is a famous actor and TV tarento.
That's a straight insult
Junichi Ishida's Wi-Fi is so slow
Good!
Slow?
Junichi Ishida
Sakana-kun
T/N: Sakana-kun is an illustrator, TV tarento, and an actual ichthyologist (fish biologist). Although he's ridiculous looking and has a funny personality, he's incredibly knowledgeable about fish.
Sakana-kun drinks rain water as soon as it builds up
Give me a break
That is not an an insult!!
No! I'm sorry
What did
What did you say about Ikkokudo?
He keeps calling his mom for 2 hours long
That's good! Great!
Team Miyasako 8 Points
On-Deck: Team Fujimon
Fujimon
Nakaoka
Matsumoto
Hosei
Murakami
Can they surpass the 8 points of Team Miyasako?
We're gonna win!
We're gonna win!!
We'll win!
We'll get the laughs to win!
T/N: They're pronouncing it strangely, almost like, "We're gonwin!"
We're gonna win!
We're gonna win!!
We're gonna win!
What are you doing?
Improv made-up insults, START!
T/N: Hideki Matsui is a famous baseball player with the nickname, "Godzilla" who used to play for the New York Yankees in his prime.
Hideki Matsui
Hideki Matsui's pet dog is really thin
Those kinds of dogs exists!!
No way! Already?
Give us a break
Rich people tend to have super skinny pets
No! But...
Rich people tend to have super skinny pets
No, but... OW!!!
THE HELL!?
Fujimon, that one was no good
Small dog breeds...
Just this one time
Let's move on
That was no good
Improv made-up insults, START!
So sudden
Shunichi Kawai
Shunichi Kawai can never get a dentist appointment
T/N: Shunichi Kawai was a professional volleyball player who appeared in the 1984 and 1988 Summer Olympics. He currently works as a sports announcer and TV tarento.
Good, good!
Shunichi Kawai
Nicholas Cage
All of Nicholas Cage's children have eccentric names
He's foreign!
Nicholas Cage
Mr. Maric
T/N: Mr. Maric is a famous magician.
Good, good!
Mr. Maric's necktie knot is too tight
Why?
HOW DARE YOU!!
Too weak
It's too tight here
You can't even do it right
But the first one...
Go, this doesn't involve you
Also, your rhythm was off
It's Shunichi Kawai, Shu~nichi~Kawa~i is too slow
One more time, do it right!
Another time!?
One more time, do it right!
You're being too generous!
Make an insult that the subject can laugh at it too
Now I get it
Improv made-up insults, START!
We should change the order
Kazuki Enari
T/N: Kazuki Enari is an actor and TV tarento.
This one's easy
Kazuki Enari's TV remote is really huge
That's a good one!
Kazuki Enari
Hiroyuki Miyasako
Hiroyuki Miyasako's family gatherings suck
Great!
Hiroyuki Miyasako
Yosuke Eguchi
T/N: Yosuke Eguchi is a poet, actor, and singer. You may remember him from the live action versions of Rurouni Kenshin and Bleach.
Yosuke Eguchi has a curtain with 1 ring missing
Yōsuke Eguchi
Chris Matsumura
T/N: Chris Matsumura is a TV tarento, fitness instructor, and musician. He is from the Netherlands.
Chris Matsumura always has a really long umbrella
That's no good!
NO!
WHAT THE HELL!
It's alright
Do you know what too long means!?
Since it's long it has to be huge!
No, that's no good
Change the order!
It hasn't gotten to me once
Let us change the order
Ok, let's start it backwards
You guys have had a lot of chances
I'm first?
We got it done right on the first try
Cause they haven't done it right, yet
Why do they get so many chances!?
Improv made-up insults, START!
Issei Ishida
T/N: Issei Ishida is an actor and musician.
Issei Ishida's refrigerator is completely full with eggs
That's good
What!?
Issei Ishida
Kozo Inoue
T/N: Kozo Inoue is a TV reporter.
Kozo Inoue always has really long glasses
Give it up, that wasn't good
Watch out!
That's enough!!
Team Fujimon 3 Points
Hamada Masatoshi
Tanaka Naoki
Audrey: Kasuga
Captain Miyasako Hiroyuki
License: Inomoto
Nakao Akiyoshi
Watanabe Natsuna
MIYASAKO
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Tsukitei Hosei
Endo Shozo
Captain Fujimon Toshifumi
LOTTi: Nakaoka
License: Fujiwara
Murakami Kanako
FUJIMON
Miyasako's team earned 10 points Will Fujimon's team bring on the pressure?
Pull with all your might, it's an electrifying tug of war!
Electrifying Tug of War!
Pull with all your might!
I'll explain the rules:
Explain it!
We need three people from each team to step forward
Electric Tug of War
3 People will face off in a tug of war
The winning team earns 10 points
Three!?
and face off in a tug of war
Of course, this is no normal tug of war
There is a static electricity generator
If your team is losing the war, and are pulled over the line
your team will be shocked by 500,000 volts
What!? That's nuts!
Why!?
We'll have a demonstration of what that shock will be like
Scientific Artist
Genki Ichioka
What? What?
Are you serious?
I'm scared
You can't be serious
That's so dangerous
We've gotten them riled up!!
WHY!?
They look like blood vessels
Good comparison
Why!?
Oh no!
Hamada Masatoshi
License: Inomoto
Watanabe Natsuna
Murakami Kanako
Fujimon Toshifumi
Endo Shozo
MIYASAKO
FUJIMON
Here are the first challengers. In this tug of war, which team will walk away without being shocked?
This is ridiculously scary!
You have to grab the metal part
Super scary
Very scary Very scary
Gonna suck, UGH
I hate this
Ok, let's get this going
Pull with all your might, it's an electrifying tug of war!
Scary!
No no no no no wait wait wait wait
A little more! Keep going!
Woah!
Ow owowowowow
Oh wow! We're dead!
Ow owowowowow
That burn smell
How was it Hamada?
You ok?
HANDS!!
HANDS HANDS
Your hands?
They're stuck like this, they still hurt
It was like "bzzzt!"
Round 1 Team Fujimon Wins
Let's move on to the second round!
Miyasako Hiroyuki
Audrey: Kasuga
Nakao Akiyoshi
License: Fujiwara
LOTTi: Nakaoka
Tsukitei Hosei
MIYASAKO
FUJIMON
Here are the challengers for round 2, well, that was the plan anyway...
Hey! Hey!
What? What?
Miyasako
Kasuga
Akiyoshi
Nakaoka
Fujiwara
Hosei
MIYASAKO
FUIJIMON
Right now Yeah?
Miyasako team has a power player named "Kasuga"
T/N: Kasuga is known for his nice physique.
Miyasako team has a power player named "Kasuga"
Yeah, a power player, yeah
We have a power player too
Huh? Who?
It's Matsumoto!!
Ok, should we swap out Matsumoto and Fujiwara?
Fujiwara... is, uh... very important
Wait... wait...
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
So arbitrarily...
I don't really know, honestly
I don't know why I'm saying this
What is this ridiculously thin haired baldy telling everyone to do?
DON'T CALL ME THIN HAIRED BALDY
It'll grow back with an electric shock
AS IF IT COULD
That'll make it worse, moron!!
Hold up, I mean... uh
This shoulder is 50 years old it's got no strength left
Oh, so you don't bench press at all?
Of course I am
I still got power here, though
How many kilos do you bench?
About, uh... 100kg
T/N: 100 kilograms is about 220 pounds.
You got strength!!
Ok! Matsumoto!
No! No! No!
Miyasako Hiroyuki
Audrey: Kasuga
Nakao Akiyoshi
License: Fujiwara
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Tsukitei Hosei
MIYASAKO
FUJIMON
And that's how Matsumoto ended up in the lineup
Thin Baldy, you should go in front
I'M NOT THIN BALDY!
He put a lot of oomph behind that
Professional voice actor
I have to go in front!?
What'd I do to deserve this?
Pull with all your might, it's an electrifying tug of war!
Give it all you got!
STOP!!
That was crazy They got outdone
You guys fell down
Yeah...
We got shocked!!
by the electricity!!
How was it?
The electricity got us
How was it?
No way! No!
Did you feel it? Did you?
You can't move them?
Grasp the rope again
Everyone felt, even over here
We felt it way over here too
If we added Ms. Murakami we might stand a chance?
Let's add Ms. Murakami
What!! No! Why!?
Sorry... Go right here
It wasn't much of a challenge last time
Pull with all your might, it's an electrifying tug of war!
Again
Here we go
Eh
Come on!
Watch out!
Woah
You're good!
Woah
Come on!
You can do it!
No good
Stand up!
Woah
Ow
Ow!
Ow!!
Ow!!!
Ow!!!!
Ow!!!!!
What just happened?
really
For real?
really
I'm not joking
It was real
Eeeh?
I swear
You sure?
I swear it got me
Wait...
I swear!
What about you, Zaki-san?
No way you were zapped!
It zapped me so much, I never felt this before!!
Alright then
To be honest...
Yeah?
Just to be honest...
Yeah
I could feel it just a tiny bit
What the hell!?
Hamada Masatoshi
Tanaka Naoki
Audrey: Kasuga
Captain Miyasako Hiroyuki
License: Inomoto
Nakao Akiyoshi
Natsuna
MIYASAKO
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Tsukitei Hosei
Endo Shozo
Captain Fujimoto Toshifumi
Murakami Kanako
Lotti Nakaoka
License: Fujiwara
FUJIMON
As Team Miyasako is leading the match
They finally reach the last round
Answer Quickly! Two-Handed Arithmetic!
Answer Quickly!
Two-Handed
Arithmetic!!
Answer Quickly!! Two-Handed Arithmetic!!
Answer a simple calculation between 2~10 using both hands
Every answer for this quiz
Is a simple calculation between 2 and 10
Quickly use both your hands to answer
Answer Quickly!! Two-Handed Arithmetic!!
If the answer is wrong, answered with only one hand, or unable to follow the rhythm, the player is OUT
If you answer wrongly
Or if you fail to use both your hands
You're disqualified!
First of all, a demonstration from Junior
Here's a demonstration from Junior
Alright, got it, wish me good luck
I wonder if I can do it
Start the sound, please!
Okay, genius
Six!
Three!
Seven!
Three!
Eight!
Oh!
What just happened over there?
I told the staff to do like 2 or 3 of them, but they made me do 5 to 6!!
Downto--
Miyasako
Hamada Masatoshi
Fujimon
Matsumoto Hitoshi
And so it was decided: this game will be a Downtown match
The one leading the match
Will be Hamada-san, from Team Miyasako
Go get 'em!
Arithmetic Prince!
Never heard of that before
I am hoping that he does so well, it becomes an endless round
Okay, okay, okay, OKAY!
All right we're doing it, Two-Handed Arithmetic
Hamada's challenge starts now!
Five!
Scary!
5 is what I said and did!
"5 is what I said and did", he says
but 6 is what he did!
Five, man!
Your voice saying "5" was so small too
Let me do it again
One more try!
But really, what the hell is this?
You should start with your fists!
Just like this
I just wanted to move 'em!
I wanted to move my hands freely
So you can just do this
Like this?
Yeah
Why does he get to try again?
No, no
This is an exception
It was the first round
I guess it would be a waste to have the game ending like this
Alright, let's go
Hamada's second Two-Handed Arithmetic challenge!
Okay, okay!
Can he make it?
Five!
Out, out, out, out, out!
OUT!
Scary!
That's just wrong!
That was terrible!
Why?!
Why that?!
What's wrong with you?
I put up 5 fingers
Wait up
Why the hell are you coming near me?!
I put out the 5!
At this point I think we should say
this is Downtown's loss
Come on, show us one round
Come on, I don't want to lose too
Downtown's failure can be avoided, come here and
show us what you can do, Matsumoto-san!
I'm not him after all
Yep!
He's ready
Come on!
You can't stop him
And now it's time for Team Fujimon
Here's Matsumoto's challenge!
Four!
That's not--
Your arithmetic is totally off
He's just an idiot
Are you a moron?
Just a plain idiot
I'm shocked
Shocked!
Electricity! It's the electricity from before
You weren't shocked
I have this great buildup of electricity here
It's still completely flowing in me!!
Four!
Downtown's complete loss!!
The buildup of electricity should not be underestimated
Let's stop getting the calculations wrong, please
Come on, can't you get a joke now?
Oh, so it was a joke!
Of course it's that
Thank you very much!
Now I see!
That was hard!
That was a nice joke
That was super hard!
It was a joke!!
A joke!!
Sorry for before
Have we really come to an era where
comedians don't get jokes anymore?
Sorry for that, we're sorry
I think they all got it by now!!
They got it, right?
They did, I'm sure of it
They got the fact it was just for laughs?
I'm sure they did!!
Here's Matsumoto's challenge
He went "four"!
He just said that
Two!
Seriously?
We're done
That's impossible
The end!!
That can't be!
Come on
You're terrible!
Terrible!
Looks like they're having a blast, though!
Look at them
Watch out for your mic
You've been flirting all the way!
Flirting here, flirting there
What the hell
I used to respect you, what a waste of time!!
Even though the recreation is over
They bring up that disgraceful behavior they just saw
Are you for real about before?
Yeah, right?
It's that we were kind of worried about you
Wasn't it obvious I was faking it?
For how long do you think we've been doing this?
It was on purpose!!
ON PURPOSE!!
That was something
That was definitely not on purpose
It's true
I mean, you both yelled at me at the same time
It was an obvious thing to say
so of course it would be in unison
Still, I wonder if it's hard
I mean, I didn't try it so I really don't know
You see, if me and Hamada
Would have done it
the right way, smoothly,
the right way, smoothly, what use would it have?
They'd be like "That's Downtown for ya"
"They're so smart" or such
That's not how it works
No way
For that, I'm going to be honest with you
When I got on stage, the staff was there
And I swear Tadaki (staff) had
a face like he was about to cry
"Please do it", they said
"Do that thing you know"
I think it would have been nice if you'd do it right at least once
I see
Well, the first round was a little too funny
If by the second round, I suddenly knew how to do it right
Then my first round attempt would end up looking so fake
So when it goes that way, you just have to
do it again, on every round, till the end
'Cause at that point you can only do that
You just have to play the clown until the very end
That's just my natural clowning abli-- ability!
Fufu
What the hell are you talking about?
I guess if you did it to stay true to the role of your inner clown
I guess what you did is very cool
How about I do it seriously just for one round?
Will you rest at ease if I show you just for once that
I can actually do it properly?
Oh yes, definitely
Ok then
Really?
Well, now we can't laugh, so...
That will do?
We can't laugh, okay?
Sure
I mean, here
Yeah
Let's do it
Hmm
Eight!
Wasn't that too slow?
Hang on, wasn't that too slow?
Slow, slow! Way too slow!
I think that was... Way too slow
Slow, slow! Way too slow!
Come on, it's not that hard!
Wait, wait, I mean, that's not it
What just happened
It's that
It came out again from me, really
Don't you get it? It came out again
If we keep on doing it, the clown will come out again
That's just its nature
Of course
It is now 11:30 AM
It's been 3 hours and half since the beginning
Eh?
How are you doin'?
You know, in our Omame's
Archaeology Research Institute
There is an amazing display of treasures you won't be able
to buy even if you work for your entire life
Today as a special treat we're going to see them together
Omame Archaeology Institute's Treasures
A tour for the wonderful treasures inside the exhibition room!
I want to see that
We're finally doing something
Finally
Finally some proper work
For real
Exhibition Room
This way
Oh, it's kind of...
Isn't it amazing, guys?
Oh!
Isn't that Kokoro-sensei?
Mental Counselor
Terada Kokoro
T/N: Terada Kokoro is a famous child actor who has appeared in many TV shows and movies.
Ah!
Fujiwara-kun, what's going on? You have so many people with you!
I'll introduce him to you, line up please
He's a very small professor, huh...
He is
Alright, everyone
This person
This person is Omame Archaeological Institute's
exclusive
exclusive mental counselor, Doctor Kokoro
Mental counselor...
If you'd like to
Shall I provide you some counseling?
By all means, doctor, please!
Thank you!
Guys, you're so lucky, aren't you!
Doctor Kokoro's
Emergency Mental Counseling
Doctor, have a seat, please
We're doing it right here?
If you would, please
I'll make sure to clear away everyone's worries, so just feel free
to ask me anything you want, please!
Thank you very much!
Tanaka sit down!!
Oh me?
You seem to have the most troubled aura
Oh is that so?
Pardon me
Excuse me
Please tell me your troubles
Ah...
Let's see...
Lately, I've kind of put on a little weight
Could you be more specific?
Oh
I haven't gotten enough exercise if that's what you mean?
So my body weight is too high...
It's okay, it's okay
You don't have to try so hard
You're adorable
You got divorced
and your mental state was tattered, but
You're doing your best, aren't you?
I wouldn't go that far-
You helped drain a pond for ZIP! and were so friendly
T/N: ZIP! is a morning news talk show on NTV.
You helped drain a pond for ZIP! and were so friendly
That's true...
You affectionately drained a pond
You're taking care of me
You affectionately drained a pond
Thank you
Even though you thought "I've already cleared a pond"
A- A-
you still went on ZIP! and were friendly
I'm not sure if that's true...
Your job has basically been reduced
Yeah
to this pattern, but you still did it adequately, haven't you?
Well, not quite
He acts like he's comforting, but says insults
I have other work as well
He's subtly saying some horrible things
You can relax now
What's this?
Thank you very much. Ah!
KISS
He got a kiss
What is this crap?
Finally, a kiss to make it all better
What a weird world
Thank you so much
Thanks. Thank you
But why though?
Thank you very much, doctor
Hamada, why don't you take a seat
Oh?
Hamada, why don't you take a seat
I wonder what will happen now
This is scary
Yeah
This is really scary
Please tell me your troubles
Definitely, it's probably the amount of sleep I've been...
STOP
Hamada, you've
been feeling the pressure too much haven't you?
Oh, that could be
Do you remember?
It was 23 years ago,back in 1995
It was 23 years ago, back in 1995
Natsumi~
Hamada Masatoshi
Cookie
T/N: Cookie is a comedian who does crappy impersonations and paints his face to look like a creepy version of the person he's imitating. Natsumi is the name of Hamada's wife.
Natsumi~
Darling
Oh, it's you
I was just in the area
I've been looking for you Natsumi~
He didn't talk like that
T/N: Komura Tetsuya is the most successful song producer in Japanese music history and is credited for introducing dance music to Japanese mainstream music.
Natsumi~ Komura said he'd write me a song
I wonder if I should sing it now?
Shouldn't I?
I SHOULD!!
I've already memorized it. Natsumi~ This song, I'll sing for you
MUSIC START!!
WOW WAR TONIGHT (Time Awakens, Movement)
T/N: "WOW WAR TONIGHT" is an actual song that Komura wrote in 1995 back when Hamada and Komura formed a musical unit called, "H Jungle with t"
Ta
Sometimes it's like this, this like this
Ta
ma
ni
wa
Kou
shi
te
Kou
It's like this so it goes like this
Kou
iu
No no no
iu
ko
to
ka
ra
Kou
na
t
te
Kou
This, this, this goes like this
Kou
na
t
te
Kou
This this, just like this
Kou
Koi
Kou
Hey
Let time awaken, movement
Hey
To
ki
ni
wa
o
ko
se
yo
MOO
BU
ME
N
TO
Ga
Don't let me down, don't let me down
Ga
k
ka
ri
sa
se
nai
de
Don't let me down, don't let me down
Ga
k
ka
ri
sa
se
nai
de
Sa
Don't do that, k~?
Sa
se
na
i
de
nee~
Ga
Don't let me down, don't let me down
Ga
k
ka
ri
sa
se
nai
de
Ga
Don't let me down, don't let me down
Ga
k
ka
ri
sa
se
nai
That's not right
nai
de
Ga
Don't let me down, don't let me down
Ga
k
ka
ri
sa
se
nai
de
That's wrong
Don't let me down, don't let me down
Ga
k
ka
ri
sa
se
nai
de
That's completely wrong
de
Don't let me down, don't let me down
Ga
k
ka
ri
sa
se
nai
de
Don't let me down, don't let me down
Ga
k
ka
ri
sa
se
nai
de
Sa
Don't do that, k~?
Sa
se
na
i
de
nee~
But it's wrong
nee~
Wow-
Wow
War-
Completely wrong
Wow
War-
to
night
Wow-
Wow
War-
Wow
War-
for
e
ver
He leaves with the doctor
ver
Wow-
Where are you going?
Wow-
Wow
War-
Wow
War-
to
night
Absolutely not
Who produced this!!
Yeah I know
Hamada
Good thing your stress was released, huh
Like hell it was!!
Noon
Without researching any of the treasures
They return to the lab
Once again, the VTR begins to play
Appearance OK Derby's next installment
When I was sitting around at my parents' house,
my mother said to me, "Hey Hamburg Steak!
T/N: This comedian's name is Hamburg Steak. He inserts "Hamburg Steak" unnecessarily into his lines. The dish, Hamburg steak, is also known as Salisbury steak, not to be mistaken with hamburgers.
How long are you going to sit around?
Why don't you get a job already?
You're a Hamburg Steak, aren't you?"
T/N: "Teishoku" can mean an occupation or a daily special dish.
Yes. An occupation (daily special) right?
HAMBUUUURG STEEEAAAAK!
HAMBURG STEAK MASTER
To take on the loudness and high tension of Hamburg Steak Master
Oh, this one?
Three celebrities have entered!
Oh, I see...
Who will consent to perform this time!?
First is this person
Thank you for having me
Please have a seat
Thanks for coming
Thank you
I don't know about his image
TATEKAWA SHIRAKU
Oh, Shiraku...
Disciple of Tatekawa Danshi (Pictured at 52 years old)
T/N: Tatekawa Danshi is a legendary Rakugo comedian. Rakugo is a storytelling comedy style.
His master Tatekawa Danshi said
"Shiraku is my successor"
Tatekawa Shiraku (Pictured at 25 years old)
With 18 disciples, he is a great master of Rakugo
He now has 18 disciples studying under him
This master of Rakugo has come to negotiate
Have you ever watched the Absolutely No Laughing series?
I have, on New Year's Eve
When I watch the Kohaku Singing Battle
T/N: Kohaku Utagassen (singing battle) is the most popular show to watch on New Year's Eve. The Batsu is the second most popular after that.
if there's a singer I don't like I watch this instead
Downtown, for me, are great benefactors
They're always coming out with new things on TV
Starting with their variety shows
Just by talking they stir things up with their cheekiness
When I appeared on a Downtown show there were lots of jokes and
it was a lot of fun and became less controversial
Downtown is pretty respectable
About Tsukitei Hosei, what are your thoughts?
As a storyteller, he's my junior. At first-
The loser character was all he could portray, so
he seemed like a coward, trying to escape and do Rakugo instead
He really gave it his all, and learned a great deal
He has started to become a Rakugo storyteller in earnest
My opinion has changed a great deal
His name is well known, and his characters are cheerful
You really laughed at that, huh
That picture...
You would laugh there, right?
At least that's what you laughed at
You'd definitely laugh
No no, I just thought it's such a nice photo
The words are nice, though
That's not it
As soon as that photo came up I was done for, sorry
My opinion has changed a great deal
So, uh
His name is well known, and his characters are cheerful
His intentions are incredibly pure, so
He looks so freaking happy right there
compared to the Tokyo headliners who aren't selling, he's much better
In 10 or 20 years, he'll be able to make his living as a storyteller
Now, the real question
This is what we are referring to
I've seen a little bit of this
The Hamburg Steak Master, right?
Right
This sort of thing, well
Rude performances aren't something I'm accustomed to...
It relies on the punchline failing, but the real joke being what's said after
Tough, that's pretty tough
So is there any chance you could help us?
As the Hamburg Steak Master, would you perform for us?
Ah, but what about his image
Definitely
Hamburg Steak...
Negotiation Complete
I'm coming in
Our next negotiation is with this person
Please have a seat
Sorry to take time from your busy schedule
Oh no, I'm not busy at all
Oh it's Kihara
Kihara Minoru
Regular weather forecaster
The famous weather forecaster for the weather segment on "News Every"
He has 32 years of experience as a forecaster
This leader in the world of weather forecasting negotiates the appearance!
Have you ever worked with the 2 members of Downtown?
Not that I can recall
How do you feel about Cocorico? Your impressions
Cocorico is Tanaka and... Who is the other guy?
Stay strong... Otherwise this will never end
Now, the real question
So, the character called Hamburg Steak Master
Hamburg Steak Master was his name?
Yes
Hmm... I'm not sure, you know what I mean?
He's hesitant
Hmm... I'm not sure, you know what I mean?
That seems tough
I want to try, nonetheless
Not sure about these kinds of roles...
What is he going to do?
Negotiation Complete
Finally we negotiated with this person
Nice to meet you you
Thank you for coming out
No way!
Thank you for having me
Wow, no way!!
Tosaka Junichi
It's Tosaka
Nicknamed "Maro"
Previous NHK Announcer
Nicknamed "Maro", his role as announcer made him the face of the NHK
Tosaka Junichi negotiates the appearance!
He resigned from the NHK and remains active
This year he resigned from the NHK, but has continued working as a freelancer
We negotiate the appearance with Tosaka Junichi!
You and Matsumoto-san appeared on Wide Na Show together
T/N: Wide Na Show is a variety show with Matsumoto as its regular commentator.
Yes
That's right
Yes yes
Right next to me is where they sat him
He smelled good to be honest
What kind of smell?
T/N: Jintan is a specific brand of breath mints that are said to have medicinal qualities.
Breath mints
was what he smelled like
Now, the real question
Itoda-san...
T/N: Itoda Jun is Hamburg Steak Master's real name.
Yes?
Which of his characters do you know?
I don't know any
This character is called "Hamburg Steak Master"
He doesn't know any of this
Hamburg Steak Master?
This is a famous character isn't it?
Everyone knows him, it would seem
I'd be doing this in front of Downtown, right?
It's a little bit embarrassing, though...
I can't imagine myself doing this confidently
Negotiation Complete
What is this?
Oh wow
And so, who will be dressed as Hamburg Steak Master
And consent to a performance?
And so, who will be dressed as Hamburg Steak Master
and consent to a performance?
And so, who will be the one between them
To consent a performance in Hamburg Steak Master's costume?
Hamada, please answer!
Hamada, your answer, please!
What?
This is hard
I think...
None of them
No one does it?
For the first time
I guess that could happen too
You got a point, I can't picture them doing him
HAMBURG STEAK!!
And so, who will be dressed as Hamburg Steak Master
And consent to a performance?
And so, who will be dressed as Hamburg Steak Master
and consent to a performance?
And so, who will be the one between them
To consent a performance in Hamburg Steak Master's costume?
Hamada-san, please answer!
Hamada, please answer!
Hamada, your answer, please!
What?
This is hard
I think...
None of them
No one does it?
Answer reveal
For the first time
I guess that could happen too
You got a point, I can't picture them doing him
Hambu~~~rg Steak!!
Who would have thought
Hamburg Steak Master
Shiraku Tatekawa
For real?
I didn't expect it
What's wrong, did you forget me? It's me, it's me
It's Shiraku-burg Steak, fellas!!
Hambu~~~rg Steak!!
Are you kidding me?!
What's wrong? Have you forgotten about me?
That's embarrassing
Hamburg Steak Master
Junichi Tosaka
It's me, fellas
It's Tosaka-burg Steak!
And so...
A hot out-of-pan joke display
I have 100 grams of a steaming hot out-of-pan joke for ya
When I was first asked to take part in this show
I promptly refused it
I mean, I had to stand here with Tosaka, you know
And why should a star from Rakugo be
Paired together with a sort of announcer guy who makes no sense
and forced to be standing next to him?
But there's a reason, actually
He kinda sucks
But there's a reason, actually
After all a connection is important
Shiraku Bu~~~rg Steak!!
He surely can shout
Coming next, your Tosaka-burg Steak will
Bring you a 200 grams hot out-of-pan joke on your table
Their voices are good
This year Udo-san, a colleague from NHK, quit his job, you know.
Because he got promoted as News Zero's new chairman, you know
That's right
You know, last month an offer from NTV came to me as well
And I thought "I wonder which news show could it be?"
And it was this huge variety show in
which I was forced to impersonate a comedian and shout, just that
Are you kidding me?
Tosaka-burg Steak forgets his joke
Put it all together, man!
He's only saying insults
Yeah that... Was amazing
He asked Shiraku for help
I'm all for the meat
Tosaka Bu~~~rg Steak!!
I didn't understand it!!
Makes no sense, I have no idea
Shiraku Bu~~~rg Steak!!
That was awful, man!!
Don't do that "I got em!" gesture, that's not it!!
Thanks for coming
Right at the climax
He slipped right at the punchline
He skipped it
Yes, he did skip over it
He felt embarrassed too...
Man that was though
If Shiraku-han wasn't there with him it would have suck
T/N: The "-han" suffix is the Kansai dialect version of "-san".
Yeah, you're right
It'd be terrible
I mean, they were also doing this antagonism play...
Yeah, that's right
(Hosei's) photo really made me laugh...
It's been 10 years (since you became a rakugoka), yes?
T/N: Rakugoka means Rakugo storyteller.
10 years, yes
I think that
You should turn bald quicker, it's for the best
I think that way you'll look more rakugoka-ish!!
Well yeah, that's probably right
You're not concerned at all about it?
Nah, I'm not
Hosei doesn't mind he's going bald
You don't mind it?
I don't
Tanaka you're... doing your best
I am, yes
When you were young---
Quit that!!
You always do that...
Are you doing it (hair restoration) or such?
I tried something like RiUP some time ago
T/N: RiUp is a hair restoration product.
Yama-chan should try that RiUP thing
Well, I'm actually doing it now!!
Wha-?
He set a trap
Of course you'd laugh
It's cause I said I didn't care
What are you saying?!
(Hair restoration) you're doing it?
But he just said before
Something like "I want to become bald quickly", he said it!
Well, well, well
I'm like whatever happens, happens
But just to be sure I'm trying it
How long have you...?
For how many months or years now?
I don't know that
I guess it's been a year
Hosei is 100% into it
This is so confusing
Which side are you on?
One year?
He's so determined about it
I had no idea
Well, my wife is buying them so I can't just let 'em be
If I don't use them, she gets mad at me
So I'm using them because she went all the way to the store to buy it
Sounds like a desperate effort
And then
Once again...
Appearance OK Derby
Appearance OK
Derby
Special episode
This time it's not a performance negotiation from our TV show
This time it's not a negotiation started from our show
But it's a burning desire of appearing in No Laughing
A reverse-offer which came from a certain person!
He reached out for "No Laughing": a reverse offer!
Is that so?
Who will this person be!?
Excuse me
It's a pleasure to meet you
My pleasure
Are you for real?!
Hirotada Ototake
T/N: Hirotada Ototake is a man with tetra-amelia syndrome, meaning that he was born without arms and legs.
ddd
Limbs Dissatisfaction
Ototake Hirotada
His 1998-released essay
His 1998 released essay
"Limbs Dissatisfaction"
about his own introspection
titled "Limbs Dissatisfaction",
set a record as a bestseller with a total of 6 millions copies sold!
Around 6 millions copies sold
A huge best seller!!
Sports writer
Commentator
Educator
A commentator, a sports writer, an educator
Ototake, a man of various faces,
Longing for an appearance
said he was longing for an appearance on our show!
Every year there's a fixed theme, isn't that right?
And whenever I watch them
I always think "What if it was me!!?" or such
For instance, on the Airport special there was this baggage turntable
I thought it'd be funny if I was on it, expressionless
I always think about stuff like this
Are you kidding me?
You met Matsumoto-san on the set of Wide Na Show, right?
Yes, I did
You can say he's shy or so
but even when he's not on air he's always considerate of others
And what about Hamada-san?
On the contrary, he...
He always strikes at anyone
And I think that's brave after all, considering the era we live in
In a way
He doesn't discriminate anyone, and hits us all alike
And in a way I'm grateful to him for it
Now, here's the real question
Which is the disguise Ototake is wishing to appear as?
The disguise Ototake took into consideration is―
I was thinking about this...
What's that?
I think this skit will be challenging for them!!
He brought his own
I think this skit will be challenging for them!!
There's one thing I'm thinking about
For example
Saito from the comedy duo "Trendy Angel" is
making his lack of hair his main joke material
Or even fat comedians joking about their build and such
But for people with disabilities, this kind of gag feels immoral
That's what they say, but I'm more like
"That's a barrier we need to cross over", like this
And I think nobody can let me fulfill this wish but this TV show!!
So let's do it!
Ototake dreamed of a certain costume, but which one is it!?
And so, Ototake dreamed of a certain disguise
Man, what will it be?
But which one will it be?
I wonder what...
Matsumoto: please answer within 5 seconds
Matsumoto: please answer within 5 seconds!
What? I don't get it, what was it?
You have to guess his disguise
Takamori Saigo
I have no idea
And the correct disguise is!? The answer's appearing next!!
What will the correct answer be?
How should I know it?
Find out as he makes his entrance!
Isn't the bar being raised a bit too much?
It is
I can hear a sound
This isn't fair, come on!!
For real, come on
This is not good!
An unexpected Ototake-robot
Alright, I got it
How could have I guessed it?!
It's R2-D2
It's him
R2-D2, huh
He chose R2...
He's laughing so much!!
That's a whole-face smile, really
Amazing... unexpected
It would have been weirder if I guessed it
I think you're right
Why is he smiling that much?
Really...
He's enjoying this a lot
It's 'cause he chose it himself
Waaaaaaaao!!
A shriek towards Matsumoto
What is this person doing?
He really looks happy, though
Yeah, he's having a blast
I guess if you take his face off is just a regular R2-D2
I guess so, yeah
Waaaaaaoo!!
That's so dumb
A shriek for Hamada too
That's... of course you'd laugh
You can't do that face to me, come on!!
He looked at you directly
Yeah he did it before too, that's it
Ototake-robot's wish is granted: he leaves
Come on, this was too much...
It's now 12:30
4 and a half hours since their research institute work began
A hard mission is about to be announced to them
I bet all these appearance fees must be good...
How are you doing?
Starting from now
You'll face Omame Archaeology Institute's treasured
special training for a while
Eh!?
It's a training meant to
Strengthen your stamina and teamwork
Which is essential for research
Everyone, get ready and let's go
Basic stamina and teamwork reinforcement
Omame Archaeology Institute's special training participation
We're here, here comes
T/N: Matsumoto is doing an imitation of the Nippon Elektel Rengo's joke, where they say, "You can't do that! No, no!"
Of course it's here, it came, it came!!
I don't like! No, no!!
Welp
Here we go
They get on the bus to go to the special training
For the 5, a new battle's curtains open
For the five comedians
The curtains open on a new battle
However
This is great weather
The ride to the training center is treacherous!!
The journey is difficult
Of course, it couldn't be a simple trip
Is that it?
We've stopped...
What now?
Arrived at a bus stop
We've stopped, huh
We've stopped
Here we go... Oh, it's pretty empty
High School Girl
Ryuji Akiyama
It's so unreliable.
Yesterday, it was completely packed around this time
Oh, but she's so slow
Hey, hurry up! The bus is going to leave soon!
Sorry, I'm here now, sorry
High School Girl
Hana Sugisaki
T/N: Hana Sugisaki is an actress who debuted in films/shows like the live-action version of Bleach, Boys Over Flowers 2, and more.
Sorry
You barely made it
Sorry
But...
Hana, are you nervous?
Of course I am!
Today is what we've been dreaming of-
The Amagasaki opera company auditions, right?
Right?
Of course you're nervous~
Uh-huh
Speaking of which, should we practice for our audition?
The high school girls' dream
Auditioning for the Amagasaki opera company
Can we?
The Amagasaki audition is different than normal groups
They don't ask you any questions, see
The things you're asked are already pre-determined
In order, you say...
your seat number
① Seat number
then your name
② Name
then your birthplace
③ Birthplace
then your hobby
④ Hobby
then your favorite food
⑤ Favorite food
your favorite phrase
⑥ Favorite phrase
then your favorite movie
⑦ Favorite movie
These questions are already determined so you just answer them
So, you start okay?
"Next entry, please!"
YES!!
Seat Number
Name
Birthplace
Hobby
Favorite Food
Favorite Phrase
Favorite Movie
That really shocked me
Seat 25!
SUGISAKI HANA!
TOKYO CITY!
MUSIC APPRECIATION!
CASTELLA SPONGE CAKE!
T/N: Castella is a cake brought to Japan from Portugal in the 16th century. The recipe has changed quite a bit from its original Portuguese form to the Japanese cake it is today.
A JOURNEY OF 1,000 MILES BEGINS WITH A SINGLE STEP!
THE WIZARD OF OZ!
I can't remember all that
I don't remember
That's good, but more...
The second part was a little too serious
Really...
Waitwaitwait
You try once
Next entry please
Seat Number
Name
Birthplace
Hobby
Favorite Food
Favorite Phrase
Favorite Movie
YES!!
SEAT 28!
AKINOYAMA SHIRAGIKU!
T/N: His actual name is Akiyama Ryuuji, but since he's acting as a female student at an elite arts high school, he has taken on a very extravagant and effeminate name.
FUKUOKA PREFECTURE!
ELECTRIC BATH!
T/N: Electric bath meaning a bath with a weak electric current. Apparently, it's used for health reasons, but it's not scientifically proven.
STRING CHEESE!
CLIFFHANGER!
T/N: Cliffhanger is a 1993 Sylvester Stallone movie.
Cliffhanger?
Who the hell actually liked Cliffhanger??
I'm not remembering this
What was his hobby?
Electric bath
You try, like I did
"Next entry, please!"
YES!!
Seat Number
Name
Birthplace
Hobby
Favorite Food
Favorite Phrase
Favorite Movie
SEAT 25!
SUGISAKI HANA!
TOKYO CITY!
T/N: NON STYLE is a comedy duo who won the 2008 M-1 Grand Prix (a competition for new comedians).
WAITING TO AMBUSH NON STYLE
KIDS HAMBURGER MEAL!
IT'S YA BOI!
RAMBO 2!
Stallone, huh
Yeah, that's him
That's so old!
Another Stallone movie...
Stallone is their favorite I guess
Do you think that will impress them?
Yeah
I like it, but
When I think about it, the first half was a little too serious
They really like Stallone
I think that was probably pretty good
It was definitely better that time
What's most important, of course
You have time to perform freely, so what do you do?
Amagasaki opera company audition
Performing freely is most important
Yeah, I know
Will you be okay with that?
Well, I've been thinking I'd play-
A Hollywood actress winning an academy award
A Hollywood actress winning an academy award?
I don't really get it, but
Do you want to practice?
Could I?
I'll be the interviewer
Got it
That pisses me off
What the hell
Hana Sugisaki's Free Performance
Yuriyan Retriever's award ceremony bit
T/N: Yuriyan Retriever is a comedian who does skits where she acts as an English speaking woman who is too full of emotions to properly speak and ends up saying awkward things.
She's doing Yuriyan?
That's totally Yuriyan
My favorite movie is "Back to the Future"
I'll just say it
Tanaka's casual outfits are so tacky
No matter what Hosei tries in his rakugo, doesn't make me laugh
That's right! That's right
Even though Endo is a dumbass who lost a fortune on Bitcoin
I did not lose that much
"Even though he's a dumbass"
She's talking shit...
Lately Hamada always has a grain of rice stuck on his sleeve
He has for a while now
Matsumoto always gets in a bad mood when the air is too dry
So bad
Amazing
Yeah!
Great job
I think that will work pretty well
How the hell would it?
Your Hollywood actress-
was a pretty good impression
What did you come up with?
So for my performance, uh, well
I think that it all comes down to facial expressions
So I want to show off my faces
How would you do that?
Let me show you
Oh, okay
The "I really want to say something" expression
Say it already!
Come on
Does this kind of person exist?
Just talk already, jeez...
That's right
Just let the words out
Yeah, I do see those expressions
Good, right?
That was a bad one!
Everyone in the audition room will all be watching, so...
Hana, you should have an act that relies on facial expressions.
You should keep one in your repertoire
Facial expression...
So, like
The face you make when you get home-
and there's a random corpse on the floor?
Ah, that's a great scene
Hana Sugisaki's expression performance
When she got home, there was a corpse
So right in front of you here
You just saw a corpse
So, go ahead and show us
Is that okay?
Let's see
NOOOOOOOOO!!
Awesome
The way she switched that on was great
That was funny
Didn't expect that
That was really good, wow
Oh boy what a twist
That really got me good
That was no good
You said it
Oh I see
She just flipped the switch and went right in
What is this?
NOOOOOO!!
She's still going!
She kept going...
Yeah...
That's amazing
Yeah
Huh?
What?
This face is covered in so many wrinkles
A pug?
IT'S A DEMON PUG-MAN ISN'T IT!!
Why?
Stop, he's just a normal person
You can't do that to normal people
You can't be so forceful with their faces
Excuse us
He's a normal person
Yes, I'm so sorry
That performance was too realistic,
I'm so sorry
I went too real
Don't do that stuff during the audition!
You can't go and start a fight with people
T/N: It's labeled as "Gaki no Tsukai News" on the bottom right, but this is an actual commercials that advertise for a movie that Hana Sugisaki acts in and has nothing to do with Gaki or the Batsu. Sorry. In case you're interested, the movie is "12 Suicidal Teens".
Training grounds arrival
The bus transporting the 5 comedians
Arrives at its destination - the training center
Omame Archaeological Institute
Ohhhh look at that
Hostage Rescue Training Center
THE CURTAINS OPEN ON A FIERCE BATTLE
With those Black Oni
The curtains open on a heroic battle
This is... Wow
Training Center Grounds
Ugh
Ack ack ack
It's sopping wet
Why here?
It's muddy as heck
Oh... No no no NO NOOO!
Due to yesterday's rain
conditions are awful
This is the worst
That was bad
There's something huge in there
Wait really?
Everybody good?
Now, the hostage rescue training will commence
Yes
You can laugh, but,
Hostage Rescue Training Rules
During training laughing is OK
But if a Black Oni catches you you'll receive a harsh punishment
I don't get it
Also, if we do this with just these members,
that old man smell
you guys are spreading around will get to unbearable levels
A world-famous young man has-
come to help
World-famous?
Go ahead!
This guy's got some stamina!
That's right
Boxing World Champion
Inoue Naoya
He really is built
Glad he came!
Amazing!
Boxing three-weight world champion Inoue Naoya
While boxing at WBSS, the pinnacle of the boxing world,
He scored a KO in 70 seconds
He fights as a Japanese national treasure
Should you really be here?
Well, I told my manager,
I want to be on this show
But now isn't really the time to be doing this
Oh
This year's hostage will be Matsumoto
Ah yes, of course that's right
Nothing has changed at all!
That's true
At the beginning, multiple Black Oni will appear
As time passes, they will multiply
To escape the Oni's punishments
Escape from the punishments
They set out to find the key to rescue Matsumoto
Absolutely Don't Get Caught
Treasure Hunters
And now it begins - Absolutely Don't Get Caught Treasure Hunters!
Ok, here we go
I'll never get used to this
Training START
That was exhausting...
Training Begins
Wait, we were still talking
Such incompetence
Sandal
Wow, they're fast
Be careful, be careful
Locked on to Inoue
He's going for it!
That's gonna hurt
He came out of nowhere
Ahahaha ahahaha
You sound so happy
That's fine, better than one of us getting it
I agree
Woooah incredible
Matsumoto spectates from his perch
It wasn't that elevated
HA! Hahahahaha!
Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!
That's...
It's okay - This is your baptism
How did it feel? Taking that hit?
Good, good
How did it feel? Taking that hit?
That hurt and they were so fast
They're fast
They really are
Very fast
That was good though
Yeah, all of a sudden
That's wonderful
That's how it goes
The second Oni has appeared
What?
Something's coming
What does it say?
Megaphone
It's coming! It's coming it's coming
Hamada, clinging to Tanaka's arm
What? What are you doing?
Come on
No waaaaay! Hey!!
Are you okay?
You
Tanaka again?
That's not it
He used me as a meatshield!
Meatshield?
Meatshield
He used a person as a shield
I wouldn't do that...
Shield for each other
I thought we would run together but I just got caught
When the Megaphone came out, I ran
Suddenly, I felt my arm being grabbed
By whom?
It was Hamada-san!!
Would you please not do that this year?
Your body is that of a champion,
Yeah
You have a solid build
Well yes, of course
Let's use him as a shield!
No no no
Let's not
That's no good
It'll be really bad for us if something goes wrong
The third Oni has appeared
Oh no oh no oh no oh no
What's written there?
Leathers, Leathers
Leathers
T/N: It actually says, "Riders". In Japanese, that means a racing jacket, such as a leather motorcycle jacket.
Wait, hold on
This is bad
What are you doing with this?
Leathers, Leathers huh
What does Leathers mean? What is it?
This is pretty bad
I'm glad mine wasn't that bad
That was quite the sound
That was really bad. Seriously.
Shouldn't we be treasure hunting? For the key!!
That's right, the key
Shouldn't we be treasure hunting? For the key!!
We should find the key
Shall we look?
What is this?
Yes, let's
10 minutes of training have passed, releasing Oni
Even more Oni have appeared
Searching the building
It's not here, huh
Is it not here?
I don't think so
Yeah
I can laugh, right?
Uwaaa!
I really don't want
It's no good!
What is this?
The champion got caught
This is his baptism
This is the one I didn't want to catch me the most
Dick Machine
The Dick Machine right?
It's the champion
Hahahahaha
This isn't the kind of champion I want to see
Really
Yeah
I'm glad it's not me
This is evil
This is super scary
This is really scary
I've never seen a champion do something like this
That's right, this kind of champ-
Let's give a countdown
Please do
Oh we're going
3
2
1
Go!
Wait wait
That has to hurt
That hit him at the base
That hurts
Hang on
Champion?
That's a low blow... A low blow...
Suddenly he's down for the count
That was pretty bad
The hardest part hit me
Give it a minute
Hahahaha
You were down for the count, huh
He was definitely down
For a second
Since Matsumoto is stuck in there
We should tell him we don't have the key yet
Good point
Let's go
Matsumoto-san, we don't have the key
We don't have it
Give me a break with this "we don't have it"
Sorry we don't have the key!
We don't
He's saying we should go home
An unnoticed Oni
He's saying we should go home, since we don't have the key
That's good, that's good
Everyone?
Yeah
Yeah, let's go, let's go
That's no good
"Everyone" being us
Sorry
Yes
The Oni is ignored
Without me?
That's why we asked
I didn't notice him either
The Oni is perplexed
What's with this guy?
We don't have the key, though
We can't help
You aren't thinking, you're just running in circles
Then you stand there and give up
He's running, he's running!
There, ah there it is
Wait a minute
When? When did he?
He was the only one that noticed, but stayed quiet
He saw him there first
You just discretely ran away
That's an awful setup
He stepped on my foot when he started running
Hosei stepping on the champion's foot
This is the worst
Top Star
What is "Top Star"?
Top Star?
Top Star
Right
He is such a dirty player
Are you alright now?
I'm fine
What? Hang on...
What what what what
Ugh that scared me... Geez... Again, they're coming in...
TKO Kinoshita
I really hate this
Another one came
I've come to give you a quiz
Oh, is that so?
Tell me these people's names, please
This person...
I know this, it's uh... Tom Hanks!
Yeah
I know this, it's uh... Tom Hanks!
Tom Hanks
I got that one really quickly
I have to write it?
Yes
There, Tom Hanks
Who is-
this person?
I know this...
Look
Right? Uh...
Waaah Hang on
He was in "Speed", right!!
Yes yes yes
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
It's coming to him
Look
Matsumoto's recalling "Speed" is slow
Oh wait just- I'm sorry- hold on
Get it right
This is irritating
Who is this person?
That one... I totally don't remember
He's been in commercials, right?
But of course I don't remember-
HIS NAMEEEE!
Who is this person?
Oh that's! Uhhhh...
That's
From "Back to the Future", right?
It's uh...
These names aren't coming to him at all
Hey!
This is awful
Hey!
He does that every time
Who the hell is that? This is pissing me off
This is cruel
Who is this person?
Oh that's whatshisface isn't it?
Uhh... Uhh...
Hehehehe
He isn't get any of these
Matsumoto only answers with "look" and "that's"
None of them
Um...
This is great
He was
From "Titanic"... It's?
He knows that one, he just can't find the name
That's right
I wonder if I can do this
Oh, like when you blank on a test
Ah! I've got it!
Keanu Reeves
Tom Hanks
(Ki) Keanu Reeves
If you take the first 2 letters-
of each of their names-
you will decipher the code
Good luck~
TO, KI. TO, KI
T/N: Keanu in Japanese is spelled "Kianu", so it's "Ki".
I see, so
I might be able to do this based on the two I know
Searching the building
What about where we were before?
Probably back there-
Leathers
It's Leathers!
Come on come on come on
I thought so!
This one is so painful. Leathers really hurt
Crap! Crap! Crap! No, I can't do this!
Hold on
You look scared
Right?
I give up
It really hurts
That's gonna hurt
Yeah, it's gonna hurt
You got a two-fer!
It looks like he's saying "I'm sorry!"
He hit, he hit your head on the way back
It was like he was saying, "I'm sorry"
The unfortunate Tanaka
Ow, that hurt so bad
What a nice guy
That was so bad
He's that guy, uh...
AH!! I remember!
There, Michael J. Fox
T/N: In Japanese, his name is spelled, "Maikeru" so it starts with a "Ma".
(Ma)
Michael J. Fox
Right?
You got it!
I told you
Why's this guy not coming to me though
They call him "something-sama" right?
Yep
I got something weird stuck in my head
I'm mixing him up with Yon-sama
That's it
It's like Yon-sama is covering him up
T/N: Yon-sama is the Japanese nickname for Bae Yong-joon, a very famous Korean drama actor.
Oh so "Re" is the last one?
Matsumoto fails to remember Leo-sama
Yon-sama
I'm being serious here
How about we all check the second floor again?
I think you're right
Right?
The Top Star!
After this, the Top Star appears!!
There he is at last!
How about we all check the second floor again?
I think you're right
Right?
The Top Star!
A Top Star is born!
There he is at last!
Top Star?
I totally forgot about this
He really is a Top Star!
I am no Top Star!
I forgot this!
Woah, he's even got a bell attached
He finally showed up
Let's just run away together
All this will get in the way
What do you mean in the way? Help me!
It's a bother, no no
Impossible, we can't move together
Hold up, this...
The Top Star!
I'm begging you all!
Nope
Nuisance
That bell's ringing is gonna give us away
Do your best!
That's right
That's true, isn't it?
Could you look around for us? This way?
You say search...
Let's look together
Don't treat me differently!
I'm not anything special!
He's definitely special
Most definitely
A Top Star walking as if he is on a runway
Just let him say whatever
Let's head to the second floor
Alright
You're beautiful, Hosei-san
Oh you're right
Those feathers really are big
The light-
Oh wow the stairs really fit him right now
Could you? From the top?
Huh?
Feels like he wouldn't lose to the real thing
That scene really fits, eh?
Oh wow, cool!
Wow!
The stunning and extravagant Top Star
He's not even looking down at his feet
He didn't even watch his step
He kept looking straight!
Seriously, without looking down once!
Look!
Saying that does make me kinda happy
Cool!
Twenty minutes since the exercise started
The amount of Oni has been increased
Once more the number of Oni increases further
Monster
Ah, the monster
You're blocking!
He was definitely blocking
Yep, the Top Star
What? Me?
The monster?
Here's the monster
The photogenic and handsome Top Star
What's that?
I'm safe!
There's more coming
Eh?!
No way no way!
They keep coming
There's so many!
No
A bunch more of the Monsters came
What's all this?!
It's a whole herd!
The hell? I hate this!
Oh man that's scary
Ouch
It hurts?
What are they doing?
This is scary
What does "monster" mean here?
Monster-san
You're done?
Waaaaah!
The monster!
This is the monster right here!
The monster!
I ain't no monster, I tell ya'
This is definitely the monster
How 'bout y'all try it
Hosei-san, help
His face is swollen!
His teeth are sticking out!
He's got a beast's teeth, this guy!
A true monster is born
Is that the monster?
Agh, ouch!
Leave us be, monster!
Wait!!
It's me, Hama-chan
Hama-chan
YOU LIE!
That's just a monster!
No way that's Hama-chan!
That's a monster!
"You lie!"
This is the worst...
Oi!!
Not again...
Don't let the monster near me! Protect the Top Star!
I understand
Excuse us
The Star that hates all monsters
That's right
There's monsters and Top Stars all around
He's really enjoying it
He said "Don't let the monster near the Top Star"
So you mind just leaving this place?
Yes, it's just...
I know he said that, but I'm the one suffering here
I thought we were partners
He even said "Don't let the monster near"
Hasn't he forgotten the plan here?
He's desperately defending the setting
Well yeah, but even the Top Star idea is weird
The setting here, they're really going all out
So I told the monster, but
Why the hell, man, we're partners!
What's with this attitude
QUIET, FOUL BEAST
YOU MONSTER!!
That guy is really pissing me off
It'd be great if he gets caught and then completely beaten up
Did it start with "pa"?
Still not there yet?
AH!! I remember!
There it is
Out of the blue, eh?
T/N: When Japanese is converted to English letters, all the L's get converted to R.
(Re)
Leonardo DiCaprio
It's Leonardo DiCaprio!
Ah
But see, I remembered
Ah
Awesome!
It's Leo-sama!
Leo-sama finally came to Matsumoto
Yon-sama
Ah I got it!
So...
Tom Hanks
(Ki) Keanu Reeves
(Ma) Michael J. Fox
(Re) Leonardo DiCaprio
TO
KI
?
MA
RE
Ah, found it!
Ah!
There it is!
They've found a treasure chest at last
Come on!
Let's go!
Get the code to open this box by asking Matsumoto
You can get the code by asking Matsumoto!
Huh?
We can phone him up?
Ah, it's like that
We can probably ask him via this phone
Ah I see
To-ki...
Oh Jesus that scared me
Yes?
Matsumoto-san? Is there a code there you can give us?
Yes
Matsumoto-san? Is there a code there you can give us?
There is, there is!
Tom Hanks
(Ki) Keanu Reeves
(Ma) Michael J. Fox
(Re) Leonardo DiCaprio
To-ki... I don't know the next, but
To-ki, blank, ma-re
To-ki-NGH-ma-re
Toki tomare? (Stop time)
"Stop time"!! I think!
It opened!
We got it, we got it!
They got the right answer by coincidence
Thank God!
However!
There was no key, the box was empty
Their efforts were in vain
The treasure chest was empty - a swing and miss
Three of them head towards the training grounds
Moving forward, three headed to the field
Two of them went to search the first floor
Tanaka and Inoue search the inside of the building
The broadcasting room
Oh, there's a box!
Ah, there it is!
There was a box right there!
This one doesn't need a key neither, so...
Open it up, can you do that?
What is this...
Hm?
Wait, what's this?
Huh?
There's a letter
Substitute Doll If an Oni catches you, give them this doll, and say a member's name. That member will then take your place instead
I see, I see
We hit the jackpot!
This is great
The two are happy to receive tools from the devil
This is great!
This is great!!
Moreover, there's two!!
There are! Shall we go?
Before that, I just got a bit of an idea...
There's a certain person I'd like to mention here
Hm...
It's Hamada-san
Ah, that's the one I thought, too
Without hesitation they go straight for Hamada
I was thinking Hamada-san
Can we both say Hamada-san here?
Right, we need to hide these
Should put them away
Keep this a secret
This must be a secret
I had no idea about this
Right?
Matsumoto-san?
Hah?
You're leaving lots of feathers behind
I, uh-
Do they come off that easily?
The Top Star is still as cool as usual!
Nothing in the exercise area!
Nothing?
What about the first floor?
Nothing on our end
Nothing
The hell...
There was nothing!
Definitely nothing on the first floor!
These guys are evil
Megaphone
Yep, he's locked on!
Hamada
Please go for Hamada
Go for Hamada
So that's why??
Huh? Wait what?
I see, I thought that was a bit weird
Wait a second
Why?
Weren't you supposed to go for Tanaka?
Are you alright, Hamada-san?
This is supposed to be for Tanaka!!
That made no sense
You alright?
Ouch
That hurts, that hurts
This is weird
Seriously, what happened?
I thought I heard you a bit
Tanaka . . . Tanaka got locked on, right?
How was it?
Don't "how was it" me, why didn't you get it
Don't know, I also thought I got caught
The Oni turned around, and ran the other way
Huh? That's weird!
But still, you got caught!
Hold up a second
I'm so sorry
The wind...
The wind?
The Star that got blown away by the wind
Really?
Be more careful, please
This is the worst
This is hell
This guy is dirty!
I'm sorry that it happened
Leathers
We didn't notice him at all
Wait, hold up
There we go
Wait a second
Hamada-san
They got him
They just caught him
Oi!! Why the hell!!
I said why the hell!
They just keep going after Hamada-san
I even said "OK"
Why?!
Hamada-san!
Wai-
Wait!!
Naoya! You got caught!
Hamada-san!
He stopped!
He stopped
Why me!
Yep, they caught Hamada-san
Naoya you...
You got caught!!
That pisses me off
Yeah, that does piss me off too
AHHHHH OUCH!!
That one was bad!
Great hit!
That one hit the spot
That one must have hurt
Wind
Hosei-san!
"Wind, wind wind!"
Oh what is even going on
Hosei, this is my bit!
The Star calmly stole away the leading role
We have an emergency
We need some help here
Yama-chan...
Let's bring him closer to Hamada-san
Bring him here!
This is some crazy wind! The hell?!
It is!
This is some crazy wind! The hell?!
It really is amazing
I'm the one that got hit!
The wind...
Oh, did you get hit because of the feather?
No I don't think so...
No cause, holding one and wearing them is different!
The Top Star, completely off mark
Tanaka...
Hm?
Take... It?
Just to make sure, let's find an oni
It'll be because of this, right
Just to make sure, let's find an oni
The leather one was bad
I'll be carrying the feather
It was rough!
Yeah that seemed real painful
The leather jacket
Hey Champ, that went well
We got him, eh?
You nailed the way you used it too
There's no way you could take that punishment
It would affect your professional career as well
What indeed could you be talking about?
I'll be holding on to this
I'll take responsibility here
What the hell?
Let's try it out
What was all that
Just as we suspected
Wait, is this really it?
Their mistaken idea becomes reality
Do the feathers really matter?
They really came to me because of this?
Turns out it's just as Hosei said
Shower of Leaves
What does "Shower of Leaves" mean?
Huh?
Kinoshita is doing something
TKO Kinoshita
The two, engrossed in a mobile game
Seems like a bunch of stuff is gonna happen
Shower of Leaves
Is this fine?
This seems scary
This is scary!
What's going on
Champion, take a look
Something amazing is waiting over there
That thing?
What is this, it's a bit scary
How are your stomach muscles?
Huh? They're not strong I guess
I don't think those are going to help you
That an 11 ton truck?
Hold up, what?
A huge amount of leaves
Oh that is scary
Wait, this is bad!
Ah, hold up, this is bad!
This is no good!
You serious?
Close your eyes!
This is dangerous!
Seriously?
Scary
It's getting damn close!
Scary
That really is close!
Treasure Hunters will continue!
More big named celebrities, one after the other!
This year as well, Hosei will...
I wouldn't want this
That really is close!
Holy hell, how scary!
Shower of Leaves
You're all laughing hard!
Look at Top Star
Tanaka disappeared somewhere!
Tanaka disappeared
Tanaka! Where did you go?!
Oh man...
Tanaka's coming out!!
A bit more!
It's a zombie!
Definitely a zombie!
Pull him out
He's buried in there deep
Tanaka-san!
So uh, Tanaka-san is crying
That was incredible
That was so damn heavy
It would be heavy
Really heavy
Haha, wait...
I couldn't move at all
You were under some serious pressure
Right
Stocking Portrait
What's written there?
After this, the search for the key continues
Flying Pie
One after another they fall victim to the Oni
And so, there you have the Flying Pie
Since the start,
40 minutes have passed, the amount of Oni will increase
Once again, the number of Oni increases
They return to search the building again
Nothing here
Go, go!
Why's it me? Hosei's right here
Hand Power
Why's it me? Hosei's right here
Thank God he took Hamada-san
Ah, they caught Hamada-san
Got him
Hamada-san...
HOSEI WAS RIGHT THERE!
I'm safe
Hand Power?
I wonder what that is
It's Hand Power
What could it be?
Hand Power
Hamada was taken to another place
Something in here, that can't be good
Woah, this place is huge
The gym ones are always the worst
Standing by on top of the stage
He's standing by on the stage all alone
So what's gonna happen now?
Right? Haven't figured anything out yet
Hand Power has arrived
T/N: This Hand Power guy is Akira Matsuo, more famously known as Mr. Maric, the magician.
He's the real deal
Hamada-san, I will have you experience Hand Power yourself
Have you seen this before?
Yeah
You have, right?
Guillotine magic
Indeed
Please take a look at the way this cuts,
It's not completely normal
This is bad
Everything's an experience
Experience? Is here alright?
That's perfect
Please, I'm counting on you
Here we go
Actually I wonder if that's alright
Huh?! Wait, stop
It's dangerous, so-
You're alright
Actually, today, we've got one more person here
Oi, come on out
The beloved daughter, Luna
T/N: Luna is Mr. Maric's actual daughter. She is a famous Japanese rapper and R&B artist.
No way, no no no
Hamada-san, please take your seat
Oh, I can?
Actually, the thing I wanted to show everyone today
will now commence
A never before seen, amazing Hand Power
will debut here in front of your eyes
Really?
Luna will, in just an instant, teleport away
And reappear in a truly unimaginable place
Luna will teleport
If he did that...
If you do that, that will really be amazing
I wanna see this
And now, she will disappear
No way
Hand Power!
There you are!
LET'S GO
Egashira
This is a joke!!
She really did disappear and then he appeared
It's magic
I'VE ARRIVED
THE ANNUAL EGA-CHAN FESTIVAL!!
It's always an Ega-chan Festival
Ega-chan festival's opening performance
LET'S GO!
What's he doing?
Guzzling down an unknown fluid
What is that?
Scary
Tanaka looks dead already
It's all over you
I DID IT AGAIN!!
Why does he have to spit on us?!
Time for my part time job!
I didn't even realize he spat on you guys!
He's just evil
He just plainly came and spat at us
He sprayed you down like it was normal
He spat on you guys!
What the hell was that about?
Since the start of the training,
50 minutes have passed, the number of Oni will increase
Once again, more Oni are introduced
We need to find the key quickly
I don't want it, no no
Champion!
He got the Champion
The Champion got caught
You're going to need to take it for the team
They caught the Champion
Big Bang?
Big Bang
That's a big explosion, "big bang"
The hell is this?
This is seriously-
Hold up, this is really scary!
This would be scary
Huh? Now hold on a second, please
It's arrived
Huh? Now hold on a second, please
Something is coming
Champion!
They're using THAT?
I guess that's why it's here
They're using it?
Using that seems a bit...
Wait, wait, what are...
What's gonna happen?
Seriously, what's gonna happen?
Woah, there it is
So they're going to use it to break that?
That's how it is
What do you mean?
Using a massive digger to blow up the balloon
Man this is scary!
Be careful!
It's damn huge!
It's amazing
It keeps getting bigger
Ah, he's starting!
Agh, scary!
That really was a Big Bang!
I thought it would cut it open, but they pushed it down!
Right!
That was intense
They crushed it down
Even though I ran away, that was something
That was damn scary though
He took it straight
Ah, hold up a second
The key - found
It came out of the balloon, I think!
The balloon?
I think it was inside the balloon!
Is that how it is!
We got it, we got it!
Finally, they've found the key
Matsumoto is released
They overcome their hardships and release Matsumoto
That took so long!
That took a while!
Your training isn't over yet, so let's head back
Man, I've had enough
This is exhausting
4 PM
Research Lab - 8 hours into their duty
The five return to the research lab
Whoooa!!
And again
The drawers' contents
have all been reset
As usual
They did it again
They do this every time
Even though we're already this far
That thing is huge isn't it?
Someone definitely has something in number 3 waiting...
Seems that way
We haven't had anything in there yet
It's very different
Number 3 is a locked treasure chest
The treasure chest
It's a treasure chest
That really looks like a treasure chest
It's huge!
Hey, aren't those made in our likeness?
Dolls resembling the 5?
Is it?
Ahhh!
Is that what it is?
I don't know who's who
Tanaka must be the tall one, right?
On the left side
The next one is Hamada
Definitely
Hamada is the second from the right
Teehee
The second from the right is Hamada
Why all of you?
You're saying stuff like "second from the right" like it's correct
That's weird
There's a reason there are five figures, for sure
I see
Is Tanaka the one on the edge?
Tanaka is the first- that's Tanaka
So are these two Cocorico?
Tanaka
Endo
No, that's not it
Tanaka is first from the left, right?
The left one is me?
This is the spitting image of Hamada, isn't it?
This is Hamada, for sure. No, no, no
Not even close!
This is-
Tanaka
Hamada
Natsumi
T/N: Natsumi is Hamada's wife.
Hamada
That's 3 of them
Why?
That's great
The tragedy soon to be summoned by these idols
remains unknown to the five...
Who are we starting from?
Shall I go?
Ok? Ok
Starting with the drawers
Nothing
Ah!
A secret?
Key #3
#3 has appeared #3?
Moreover...
Is that it?
Ah, that's it
Guess I should open it
I guess
He's going, he's going to do it?
No, but
Normally, you'd expect treasure
Sure you would. That's a treasure chest, right?
The intriguing #3
Old-man eyes
He's so far from it
It's probably a "PSHHH"
Yeah
Nope, it isn't
Huh?
What is this?
Trashcan, tissue
Kendama
A bouncy ball, and a ladle
That's a lot of stuff
Mysterious assorted goods set
So what is this?
What is that?
What kind of set is this?
The Thai Kick God's
Sacrificial Ceremony!
The sacrificial ceremony for the Thai Kick God
The name of a sacrifice will be determined, to appease the angry Thai Kick God's rage
What??
Ceremonial Rules
Using these artifacts
The 5 will hold a battle to not be the last one standing
Oh, all of us are doing it
The last loser standing will become a sacrifice to Thai Kick
This is terrible
First: Catching the kendama on the first try
Catch the kendama on the first try
T/N: A kendama is a toy with a wooden cross-like shape with a string and ball with a hole. The objective is by only holding on the wooden portion, swing the ball to land in the 3 different cups, and then have the pointed end go into the hole in the ball.
Catch the kendama on the first try
If you can catch the ball on the middle cup in your first try, you will be victorious
Hang on just a second!
Hang on!
Those who fail will remain a loser, and move on to the next round
This is a tough one
It's this kind of thing
Enough with the Thai Kick
I'll get it on the first try
This is
Losers stay in
There are a lot of other items, too...
True true true true... True
That's right
I'm definitely getting kicked once or twice
No, I don't think so
If you can't do this one
Only one person does
You continue
You aren't listening to the rules at all
Excuse me, Matsumoto, you need to listen...
You don't listen at all
I don't always listen well
Sorry, me too
Endo's loveless tsukkomi is awful
Excuse me, but my tsukkomi sounds a lot like "slap slap slap"
He's getting rude, isn't he? Right?
He's getting rude
Sorry for speaking so strongly
Let's do rock paper scissors
That's it!
It's important to be first
It's important
Really? Come on...
We're doing rock paper scissors?
Yeah, will you go first?
I'll go
Ah! That's wonderful~
If you get this, you'll be in a good position
That'd be an advantage Yeah
For sure
Actually, if I have good form I wonder if I can do this
Is it okay if I practice?
No way!
Hell no!
Not a chance!
Cut that out...
That was an incredible rejection!
Obviously we did
You really told me!
Goi Goi Su-
T/N: "Goi Goi Su" is a phrase used by Japanese comedian, Daian, which is used to mean, "Amazing". It comes from the word "Sugoi".
Goi Goi Su-
Go ahead
Not laughing at all
Matsumoto stays in!!
Man, I totally laughed
The way you did that was awful
The tension and release was incredible
And he missed
Seriously, seriously, seriously
I couldn't summon my normal power
Yeah, that's it
Who's next?
Endo
Okay
Go ahead
Already it's like...
Don't take too long
Yes
Here I go
Nice and smooth
Niceandsmooth!
Endo wins his way out
This is ok, right?
You kind of looked like you were smiling, though...
Man, I really don't want a Thai Kick...
Do you really think you can catch it now?
Yeah
Make it snappy
Amazing!
Hosei wins his way out
He caught it?
Tanaka
Okay
Hell yeah!
No no no
He slipped
You said "yeah!"
But you were smiling like normal when you said it
You caught it?
But that's just fiiine~
But yeah, but yeah, but yeah, yeah, it's okay
But that's just fiiine~
That's pissing me off
Here I go
I get it already
Tanaka wins his way out!!
You've got to be kidding
That's totally fine
I don't mind at all
Taking this one spank
This one spank, I don't mind at all
This is fine, too
Oh, okay
OK OK Thank you!
Thanks!
Hold on, hold on- something's off
No that's okay
I suck at this
But Hamada, if you get it
No no
Go quick, go quick
THREE, TWO, ONE
Hold on a second
THREE, TWO, ONE
OUCH!
He missed it!
Hamada stays in!!
What the hell was that?
It hurts. My geriatric shoulders hurt.
It's really heavy
Well, that's it for the kendama
Just Downtown remains
Ladle bouncy ball catch
What?
Ladle bouncy ball catch
Throw the bouncy ball against the ground.
Hard enough that it bounces above your own height
Oh!
If you can catch it the first time, you will be removed from the challenge
That's pretty hard though...
To get it above your head, you really want to toss it
Yeah, above
If you don't use enough strength
Hey Endo, show us how it's done
Okay
Just now you were saying to give a good toss
Speaking of which
So are we resetting now?
We're not resetting
No, that would be- well, sorry
Are we resetting?
Even if you're my senpai, that would be...
Yeah Yeah
Well, if it were me
I would reset, even if I had won
You may have seniority, but the rules say the losers continue on...
Yeah
That's...
Yeah
Senior or junior doesn't even come into it.
It's not seniority
For the rules and
Right
for the game, why don't you try it?
Sorry
Tanaka would be best at it, wouldn't he?
Tanaka would
Tanaka will you do it for us?
"Tanaka does it?"
Does what?
The Thai Kick
Thai Kick? Me?
Yes
What are you saying?
I don't really have any objections...
What are you saying?
Well, you're used to it
You always get it
Even if I do always get it
We want to see your technique in this area
Exactly
Thai kicks aren't my technique or anything
You've mastered them
It's freaking hilarious too
Right? Right?
Hey!!
Hosei, what do you think?
I, uh...
Just this once, I'd like to be quiet
and be myself
Apologies
What's that mean?
He left Tanaka out to dry
Oh come on, I was safe there!
Just wait another minute!
What does that mean? "Be myself"?
I hate those damn Thai Kicks
I still don't get it
Endo, try it
Right right right- perhaps you can't do it
I'll try to get it the first time
Just like that
Despite his terrible vision, too!
Right?
Just like this
It's easy
You say that
It's really easy
It's just like that
Very well done
It has to go above the shoulder?
Just above your head
Above your head
Above the head? Yeah
I really hate this
The rip-roaring second half
No Laughing Treasure Hunters
Famous Actor
Famous actors compete one after another
Famous Actor
Big Name Celebrity
YOU?!!
What are you making them do?!
You're a descendant aren't you!!
No sir
Hosei's arch-nemesis Chono's appearance
A big chance to avoid a slap
I drank it!I drank it!
I drank it! I drank it!
Hellish stories!!
Late Night Treasure Hunters
Downtown is attacked!?
While searching for treasure late at night
We'll find out what attacks Downtown!
Keep watching until the climax!!
Above the shoulder?
Above the head
Above your head
Above the head? Yes
Really? There's no way...
Hamada stays in!!
That wasn't even close!
Oh no. That was awful
Even the way you lost... Was bad. It was pathetic
That was awful! Very pathetic
"Forever impossible" is how that felt
You were playing it like you pass the ball to your opponent
Yes, for his opponent...
Next to him
So now
Hold on, how did you get it Endo?
Keep your eye on the ball
Matsumoto stays in!!
He couldn't do it either!
Seriously
It wasn't even above his head
Oh come on
Give me a break
Oh, the next stage
Trashcan Tissue Shoot
The last ceremony - trashcan tissue shoot
But that's hard
Trashcan Tissue Shoot
Using as many tissues wadded up as you like
Using as many wadded up tissues as you like
Throw the wad into the trashcan on the desk from about 2m
T/N: 2 meters is about 6ft 6 in.
If you can get it the first time, you'll win your safety
2 meters
2 METERS?!
I'm telling you this is too hard
So, let's all go in order
Let's start with Tanaka
What? Why?
That doesn't make sense
It's just you two, right?
Yeah
How far is 2 meters?
Let's get it ready
This should be about it, right?
More or less Okay
So which of you is doing it?
It's ready
Is Endo first up to try?
I'm not going, though
But the reset?
We said we were resetting, though!
Well, like we told you
The rules say it's you two in sudden-death
Right, it said that-
But it said we were all doing it
It's just you two
It said that, but
Shouldn't we all do it?
It's like you didn't listen
Why would we go?
Let's get the tissues
Let's get this over with already
As many as you want
It would be best if we all did it
How many sheets of paper? It is sudden death after all...
If we did that
The viewers would be upset, probably
That's right
Be upset? Yes
I don't know what you mean
I have no idea what you mean
The person being sacrificed hasn't been decided
The losers keep competing
That means it's a fight between you two!
Then you should do it, moron
💢
It's what I've been saying, goddamnit
T/N: It's hard to translate, but Hamada's Osaka dialect is coming out in a really harsh and angry way.
YOU HEAR ME?!!
He's scary
WHY DON'T YOU JUST DO IT, MORON?!
💢
He's crazy
That's a crazy turn of events
There's a really bad atmosphere now
Crazy for sure
Of course the atmosphere would get bad
So, let's all do it!!
No...
Oh, I've got it! So, uh...
You just do it, but you aren't in the competition
That's good
Just for fun?
We wouldn't be competing?
That should be fine...
If it's just the two of us...
It's not funny then
It just wouldn't really work
It would just look like old people playing...
That's embarrassing
You say it's embarrassing
But we were so desperate in getting it done
Let's go from Endo
Okay, but we aren't in the competition
We aren't competing
It's just you two
How are you throwing that?
Underhanded? Throw it overhanded...
Throw it overhand!
The VTR did it overhanded too
On the VTR
Oh, the VTR did it overhanded
So that means you were actually paying attention...
Wow, how dare you talk to him like that...
Right?
If that's how you're going to talk to me
I'm sorry
Now I don't feel like doing this
I'm sorry about that Hamada-san,
If you talk like that to me
Calm down, let's just cool down a bit
Okay fine - how about you just try it now?
Try it
Starting with me? Yeah
It has to be overhand
Has to be overhand?
It has to be overhand
Gotta be
You won't get a second chance, Endo
Hurry the hell up
Isn't this supposed to be a fun game?
It isn't fun!
Yeah, that's great
It isn't fun at all!
Don't do that stuff
You can't do that!
Right, right, right
It wasn't like that with the kendama and stuff. This isn't fun!
Do it lightly
Try it lightly
Throw it lightly?
Throw it lightly
Throw it with the intention of getting it in
Yes, of course
Here I go
Endo wins his way out!!
You got it?!
Endo...
I mean, I did play baseball
Why did you make it in?
Endo takes it all
Endo takes this whole game
Well, that's-
He took it all
It's all Endo
I've never seen you take a Thai Kick
Oh, you're right!
That's not true - I won in all of these challenges
Really
I doubt that...
Um... It has nothing to do with this...
Hurry the hell up!
💢
Come on~!
Oh come on~!
This isn't fun at all
Are you really that surprised?
Probably it was only Hosei-san who was surprised
He was really surprised
Hosei wins his way out!!
You got in position quickly
Tanaka
Good luck
Do your best
Okay
With this one
Tanaka's reach is an advantage
That's true
Tanaka wins his way out!!
What a dumb way to throw...
Why did you make it in?!
What? What is this?
What the hell?
LET'S HAVE SOME FREAKING FUN!!
Let's have some fun
Yes, let's have some fun
ALRIGHT?!!
Let's have fun
Which one?
Which should we start with?
I don't care Yeah
Okay, I'll go last
Hamada-san, so you're going first?
Wadding this up is a pain
Teehee, this is great
Hamada wins his way out!!
Wait, hold on
Hang on a second
I was telling them to wait...
You were
Well, then
If you get it in we'll all do it again
It's down to this
If you get it in we'll all do it again
If he gets it in
We'll all do it again
If you get it in
For real?
Pfft
What? No! NO!
Are you serious?!
That hurts!
I'm fine without it
I'm fine with it
That's just painful
I'm fine with it
COME ONNNNN
Seriously, I'm fine with it
Wait just a minute
Does that mean?
I hate it
That means it's Matsumoto-san
No, but-
Not this
No, really? No wait!
The Thai Kick isn't necessary, right?
He's here!
He came
Seriously?
Matsumoto-san!
This will hurt like crazy!
It's been a while, hasn't it?
It'll be bad if you don't go to a wide open area
IT HASN'T BEEN A WHILE!
Look out
IT HASN'T BEEN A WHILE!
Watch out
AAAHHHHH!!
Aah that hurts!
Aah it hurts!
Can't help it
Wow, that hurts, huh?
Tanaka, it hurts!
I told you, it really hurts!
Amazing
Hosei is seriously laughing
He's laughing really hard
You're really enjoying this
I'm not enjoying it
Thai Kicks in the Batsu Game
should be banned forever
You're so right
Well...
Tanaka, are you going?
Oh that's right
We didn't finish it
This is only the second one
Ugh I'm tired...
That's right, we didn't finish
Key #1
This is insane
The problems keep piling up!
You're so annoying
Here I go
Wait, here?
Obviously!
It opens that up Yes
Again?
"A traditional feast of my tribe"
"Please accept this humble meal"
This is-
"Headhunter tribe"?
Scary
Headhunter Tribe's Feast
Is it heavy?
Well, it has some weight to it
It's frozen right? Something's coming out
It looks like dry ice
It's frozen?
Oh come on, this is scary...
I'm opening it
What?
What's this?
Scary...
This is kinda scary
What's that?
"Lift it together with its plate", it says...
What does it mean?
It's so cold
If it's from the headhunter tribe... Is it a head?
No way
Just gimme a break, come on
What the hell?
Monkey-Hamada's head
What's that?
Geez
Really, what's with this?
What's this? For real, what the heck
Yeah, what the--
This is incredible
Do we have to eat this thing?
We can't eat this
Yeah...
What is this? Look
Woah
Huh? But look here
Try to take a bite
There's a line, can you see it?
Maybe you can open it?
Maybe we can open it from the hair
Maybe
Let me try
This looks gross
What the-- come on
Please, enjoy eating its brain
This is so messed up
They brought some creepy stuff...
Disgusting
Such a poor taste
It's incredible
Horrible
Try to eat it
It takes a lot of courage
It takes courage, of course, what's this?
This kinda feels rude
I bet it does
Right?
It's hard
It's stiff
It's hard, isn't it?
Can you stop holding it by the cheekbone?
Like this?
I don't know how to hold it
Where should I?
Matsumoto pointed that out
I mean, holding the head...
I have to hold it...
Well, yeah, I know but...
Isn't it better if you hold it from the hair?
Where should I...?
Just like that, yes
This thing is so hard
It's really well made
Yeah
It's incredible
Taste it
Here I go
It's delicious!!
You're laughing
He just laughed
It's good
It's really good
Brain = strawberry ice cream
Strawberry?
Strawberry ice
It is
Yeah, but still...
This is incredible
Wow, it's really...
It was really good
It's really incredible
It looks like a tilted hat
It's slightly tilted...
That looks odd
What a surprise
But it's amazing
Yeah
Yes
It went good at least
Well yes, it was good
And we're done with your drawers
Let it freeze
Let's freeze it back
It's the headhunting clan's snack
Yama-chan, we haven't seen your drawers yet
You're right !!
He's right...
It took us so long
Yeah
Isn't it right?
Right
Yes
See?
Woah
Mysterious manuscript & key
What's this now?
This is...
It's the same as Hamada's
Again?
It's exactly the same
It's the golden thing...
Prove your brave spirit via the devil's mouth. A strong golden fortune will come to dwell within you.
It's the same as before
What the hell?
That really stunk
Be careful
Can't help it
He's right, be careful
Be careful
This...
We don't know if it's the same for sure
You're right
But still, it's scary
It is
I'm going
Yes
Ok
I'm scared
Wha--
What's that?
Does it stink?
No...
It's sweet!
It doesn't even stink...
Hosei, let's go get changed, ok?
I'm going
I see...
So that was the point of it...
So that's the reason...
A change of costume for Hosei, who always causes trouble
Hosei, who causes trouble every year, will have to change his costume
What will this year's costume be?
Ehh? What's this?
Give me a break...
We're waiting for him to change clothes again
Yeah
Just like every year
That position is no good
Yeah, this spot is really not good
I know
Does it stick to this year's theme?
Tutankhamun costume
I wish they could stop this
I told them I felt bad for you and such...
Thanks for your concern
Why does it always have to be me?
Well
We don't get dirty
Even if you say so...
This is really...
Sorry to say
It's harsh on me, I'm 50 years old, you know
Yeah
That's true
Hosei, oh Hosei
What?
Art thou perhaps making fun of us?
Huh?
Life dwells inside the idols
Woah, impressive
Eh? What's this?
It's incredible
Amazing
Really cool
We are the Apobis
They're talking
We've been at king Tutankhamun's service
We've been at King Tutankhamun's service
as dark shamans since ancient times
Hey, Hosei. What is scum like you doing in that outfit?
Art thou perhaps insulting our king?
That's not it
Is this an affront to him?
They all spoke together
You're wrong
They arranged this for me
Those who ridicule our king won't be forgiven
And for those who face our wrath,
only a fate of misery awaits them
This is incredible
It was surprising
Feast thine eyes on this and realize
Incredible
It was 1949
John Wood III, a multimillionaire antique collector
Found Tutankhamun's royal treasure, protected by the Hipopo clan for generations and stole it
The wooden idol
The ancient mummy
The golden chalice
But on these three hidden treasures...
Curse
There lied a terrible curse
While returning
The seven treasure hunters
Led by John Wood III
Mysterious deaths
Started to die under mysterious circumstances, one after another
And even though John Wood III himself managed
Even John Wood III...
To bring the treasures to his mansion
A few days later
A violent storm suddenly started
And he was struck dead by lightning
Death
All their deaths
Were said to be the result of divine punishment
Ancient Mummy's divine punishment
Brought by the ancient mummy
Hosei, in order to escape from mine divine punishment
Yeah
there is only one way and that is...
The bonds with your friends
We'll now proceed to ask your friends
some questions about you, Hosei
And if they manage to answer within 10 seconds...
Thou shall be freed from the divine ass-whacking punishment
Wait...
However...
If they won't be able to answer...
The divine punishment for Hosei shall be executed
Failing the quiz = punishment for Hosei
I'm counting on you guys
This is different from the other years
But we have no idea what they'll ask us
Even if you say so...
But maybe
If it's some personal stuff, then...
Yeah, what can we do?
Maybe Matsumoto is the most suited...
It could be, but...
You two know me a lot too
We've had tons of fun together, haven't we?
It's true but...
We'll just try our best
Yeah
Come on
Can you stop saying "we had fun" or such?
Please
Let's stop setting traps too, okay?
Isn't it obvious?
He's right
We don't want to
You really think we want your butt to be slapped?
We'll work hard to protect it
I'm begging you, please
Count on us
Yeah
For real
Yeah
Yes
Alright?
Alright then, let's ask Hamada
What?
Hosei's birthday...
Which month and which day is it?
Hosei's birthday is...?
You know it, don't you?
We know each other since 30 years
I'm so sorry but
I really have no idea
You're sorry? I know yours!
Yeah but... I don't know
You should know this
Incorrect answer
Oh come on, that's hard
Wait a moment! Hey!
He didn't say anything!!
I'm sorry, was it June...?
It's not June
Not even close
Wait a moment
W-wait
I have no idea, really
THAT HURT!!
Ow ow ow ow, it hurts
Oh god
Wait
Please, just stop
Stop moving like that!
Stop doing that
That's too much
You can't do that
Please, stop moving like that
I swear I'll stop, I'll stop
I get that hurt just now
Here's the answer
ANSWER: FEBRUARY 15TH
Man, I really didn't know
It was that
Hamada-san, yours is on the 11th of May!
Yes, thank you---
"Thank you" my ass!
You're right
That's completely wrong!
We're sorry, we're sorry
But please, let's just
Try to get along
Wait a sec--
Let's get along
Alright
Something like this
Is what we don't want to happen right now
Yes, we gotta keep our bond
Also, that comical way of moving is no good
I'm not trying to be comical
I've said this before
"My ass is done for" - I said it, didn't I?
I said it, didn't I?
What was that for?
What is he talking about?
Alright, we got it
Wait, wait---
Please wait
That's too much
That guy hits hard
It friggin' hurts
Even just now he...
This can't be good
It only took one hit to become like this
It looks bad
For real
I really thought it came off
Alright but really
I don't think it will come off, ok?
Hang in there
I'm sorry for that
NOW, LET'S ASK MATSUMOTO
Yessir
Please, wait...
Which university did Hosei attend?
That one, yes?
Q. Which university did Hosei attend?
You know I went there
I have no idea
Remember I told you when I was 30 I decided to study again?
So... Ok?
I have no idea!!
INCORRECT
How am I supposed to know that?
I really don't know
Yeah, me neither
I didn't know that
What's this?
I wonder which one is it
Please...
AAAAH!
Stop--
Stop that, please
We said enough of that
Those moves...
Stop moving like that
Didn't we?
Alright?
Please stop moving like that, Hosei
That's the issue here
You're overdoing it, geez
Come on
What the hell?
Just try to hold it
We have to do something about this...
I know it's painful, but that...
I think he knows it
But...
That looks bad
I think that
We could have figured it out
I think I know the answer
Which is it?
I have no idea
It's just like your name, isn't it?
Just like my name?
What do you mean?
What?
Hosei University, right?
I couldn't get into that school!
The correct answer is...
Rissho University
I had no idea
ANSWER: RISSHO UNIVERSITY
Ahh, now that they said it...
I mean I know there is Hosei University, but I also knew it was wrong
Now I remember
We have to do something
This is really bad
It was kinda impossible for us
I'm done for
Use that to cool him down
Ah! You're right! Right, right, right!
We have the right stuff here
What--?
Here's the good stuff
No way
What's with "good stuff"?
Ah, that?
I mean, this is an emergency
Here
Woah
Are you using that?
This will cool him down
Yeah but... that?
Is it working?
It's cold, but...
No way, wait...
I think that...
Maybe it's better like this
Yeah, definitely
No way, come on
You gotta be kidding me
We had to do this
We have to cool him down
But really
This is really effective, I think
I think so too
It will quickly cool him down
Yeah, it feels better now
See?
Now, let's ask Endo
Now it's Tanaka, right?
Oh, I'll give my best
Go for it
I'm counting on you
What lessons
Yes
Did Hosei take during his childhood?
Eh? Which is it?
Q. What lessons did Hosei take during his childhood?
It's something I learnt, come on, I'm always saying it
"I'm good at this" - I always say that!
Ah! T-then I'll go for it...
You can do it! Come on, say it!
It's...
You can do it! Come on, say it!
Kendo
T/N: Kendo is a swords martial arts that requires wearing armor and using wooden swords or bamboo swords for practice. There are a few Gaki no Tsukai episodes where Hosei shows off his kendo skills.
Alright!
INCORRECT
What?!
Huh?
Huh? Why?
Wasn't it kendo?
Wait a sec...
But it's kendo
Yeah, it's kendo
It's kendo
It's kendo!!
IT HURTS!!
But...
Wait, wait, wait
What are you doing?
What the hell
Why did they walk together?
Gimme a break!
What the hell, man
Come on
Give us a break
Wait a second
What was that just now?
Are you alright?
What the--
Wait a moment...
Was it wrong?
The answer was "painting lessons"
ANSWER: PAINTING LESSONS
I mean, I went there
But for just two months
Well, I guess that's it...
It was just for two months
How could we guess it?
I mean, you said it yourself
But I did kendo for 13 years
While I had painting lessons for just two months
Alright, alright...
Wait, guardian deities...
Enough, just forgive them
He's going for it
Guardian deities
Please listen to me, oh guardian deities
I know this is so sudden, but from now on
Can all the four of them answer together?
They're all my precious allies, I swear!!
Alright, let's ask Hamada
Eh? Geez...
They won't listen
What was...
What?
You have to answer
The name of the sisters duo
Hosei worked with as a producer?
Q. What's the name of the sisters duo Hosei worked with as a producer?
You know it! "A"! "A"! "A"! "A"!
Ehhh?
You know it! "A"! "A"! "A"! "A"!
"Ah"? "A"? Alright
Yeah, it's "A" !!
"Ah"? "A"? Alright
Like that, yes
"Ah"? "A"? Alright
Like that, yes
A... A...
That's right
"Ai" you said that
A- Ai?
That's it! One more time
INCORRECT
Ai?
That's it!!
We did it!!
We did it, we did it!!
We did it!
Yeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaahhh!!
YAAAAAAAAAY!!
He just broke
OWWWWW!!
We broke him
Man we did it
He's broken
We finally broke him
Hosei's broken
I had no idea, man
CORRECT ANSWER: AiAi
Cool him down, quick
Now that they said it I remember
Look
This isn't good
Let's put it here
Spread it
This is messed up...
Like this
What the hell are you doing?
How is this?
No way
Doesn't it feel good?
Does it hit the spot?
He's looking here
I really don't know
Looks good
It feels like Hamada is protecting you
Thanks
No way it feels like that
Yeah, I think it's good
Are there still questions left?
I swear
Can't they just forgive us?
Yeah, isn't that enough?
For real...
Enough of that
Alright, our next one will be our final question
That's the last one
Let's ask Matsumoto
Yes?
Who was
The co-host lady for Hosei's TV show "Tensai TV-kun"?
T/N: "Tensai TV-kun" was a TV show aimed towards elementary and middle school children that adults could also enjoy.
Q. Who was the co-host lady for Hosei's tv show "Tensai TV-kun"?
A lady?
I have no clue
Here's a big hint "Risa something"
Risa Stickmayer!
INCORRECT
Eh?
It was correct
Was he too late?
You'll be fine, don't worry
Hamada will protect you
Don't worry
It opened up at the end
Something came out
Oh, you're right
Looks like tinfoil came out from Hamada's head
So many things are happening...
Wasn't that the correct answer?
Yeah it was
The correct answer was "Risa Stegmayer"
ANSWER RISA STEGMAYER
Ah, I said "Risa Stick-"...
I see, it was "Steg"...
"Steg"
That was so unfair
"Risa Stegmayer"...
BURN IN HELL!!
What do they mean?
Eh? Scary, they said "burn in hell"...
That was impressive
Yeah, it was
It's over now, isn't it?
Yes
That surprised me
What a terrible time we had
We tried our best, but the questions were too difficult...
That's true
We couldn't get them right
Hosei let's go get changed
So quick!
Hosei let's go get changed
He left the room so quickly!
It's 5 P.M. and they're waiting for Hosei to get back
9 HOURS SINCE THE START
Oh, welcome back
Much appreciated
That was insane
It really hurt like crazy
I bet it did
Man, today's been harsh...
Thanks for the cushion
That must hurt a lot
We didn't know as much as we thought
You really don't know anything
There were like 2 questions for each of us, that's 8 hits...
I guess 10 hits would have been way too much
Yes, no way
That was absurd
Huh?
Are you sure your ass really hurts?
It really hurts
You seem too normal to me!!
I'm not normal
It's been burning this whole time
I'm shocked to be honest, you don't know anything about me
Unsatisfied by the quiz's results
I know a lot about you
What's my blood type?
Let's see...
It's A
It's O
I mean, blood types...?
If we did all four at once
If only the four of us could have answered together...
We could avoid a lot of this
That's right
Right, that's we should've done, probably
How about I tell you?
Endo is Type O
Hamada is Type A, Matsumoto Type B, Tanaka Type O
Originally you told me AB
But then you changed it to O
I know all of you!
What's Tanaka's birthday?
Yours is
April 26th
Endo!!
You...
You have a birthday, don't you...
Obviously I do
See, it's like that
It's like that
Come on, you...
You shut up real quick
He stopped immediately
Just now, Endo was shocked!!
Yeah, even though I answered quickly
Hamada is May 11th
Matsumoto is September 8th, the same as my eldest son
Oh really? Your eldest son has the same birthday as me?
That's right! I've told you so many times!!
When he was born, I immediately called you!!
Oh yeah...
Sorry I just, y'know...
Come on...
Matsumoto, that's no good
Right Hamada? It's the same birthday
Yes
Wait a sec
Honestly, since it was your third child
Right
I wouldn't have made that connection
Ah! You scared me!!
You guys good?
You silently slipped in here, huh...
You really shocked me
The exhibition room seems to have been burglarized.
Let's go take a look!!
The exhibition room holding that treasure
has been burglarized! They hurry to the scene!!
Burglarized?
Isn't that relaxing
Exhibition Room
It's decorated
The police are currently investigating. Could you line up here?
Detective
Kendo Kobayashi
T/N: Kendo Kobayashi is a comedian who regularly makes appearances on the Batsu game, often playing a detective role.
Shiiiiit
This exhibition's most valuable treasure
The golden collar was stolen
How did they slip past these impregnable defenses?
Searching for clues about the culprit
Case Note
Inspector!!
Did you find something?
We believe we've found the culprits- a 3 man team
"We aren't thieves!
We're comedians," they said...
Comedians?
3 men calling themselves comedians!?
Case Note
Whatever, bring them in!
Yes sir!
Oi! Get in here!
T/N: The Kameda Brothers are three professional boxers comprised of Daiki, Koki, and Tomoki Kameda. Kameda Shiro is their father, who has also appeared in the American Police Batsu.
Terakado Jimon
Kameda Koki
Katsuhiro Higo
Kameda Daiki
Ueshima Ryuhei
Kameda Shiro
What are they doing?
Ueshima Ryuhei (the real one)
T/N: Ueshima Ryuhei is a comedian who is one of the regular members of the loincloth gang skits in the Batsu.
It looks just like him!
He does look like him
They had the look down perfectly
You're the bandit gang "The Kameda Family" aren't you!
No way! We're Dachou Club!
T/N: The Dachou Club is a 3-member comedian group comprised of Higo Katsuhiro, Terakado Jimon, and Ueshima Ryuhei. The Kameda Brothers are imitating the Dachou Club.
Come on...
We're Dachou Club!!!
Hey, jump! What are you doing?
Jump, damnit!!!
Stop dawdling!
What even is happening right now?
What are those 3 doing?
It's crazy
I disagree
I don't think you're the Dachou Club
We're getting nowhere... What should I do!!
You're too careless!!
Famous actor
This year's comedians' life-on-the-line festival!
Hosei, as usual
Uproars for the New Year's treasure hunt!
We're getting nowhere... What should I do!!
You're too careless!
Takashima, sir!
What exactly is going on here?
A confusing guy just entered...
Yes he did
Though they're the Kameda Family thieves,
they insist that they are Dachou Club
Senior Detective
Takashima Masahiro
T/N: Takashima Masahiro is a famous actor, well known for his roles in crime and mystery dramas.
If you're the real Dachou Club
You'd work together better, and be more nimble
Why are you the only old one?
Because you're the only old one, we're getting told off like this...
What the hell, who are you talking to?
You got a problem?
You want to do this?
Oh? You want to do it?
You wanna go?
Oh yeah?
Are they really...?
Could it be...
We doing it?
They're doing it?
Smooch
That's his son!
A kiss between fighting father and son
That's his son
What are this father and son doing?
Even if you go as far as to say that
Let's try the piping hot oden- Hey, bring it in
Verifying the Legendary Comedians with Piping Hot Oden
Case Note
I see...
Hey!
Why's this all on me?
You're the leader, so you do something!
Why do I, the leader, have to do it?!
Do it!
Why should I do it?!
Guys, stop!
What will this fight uncover?
It's you!!
For some reason, Takashima is in his underwear
What the hell?
You guys aren't Dachou Club
TAKE THEM AWAY!!
Yes sir!
What?!
We're Dachou Club!
Verified as fakes, they are forced out of the room
Case Note
WE'RE DACHOU CLUB!
I didn't think they were
Yeah, they're definitely fake
Okay! Let's get back to the investigation
Yes sir!
Continuing the investigation in his underwear
Why just underwear?
They dropped this whip-like thing
Lost Leather Whip
Case Note
T/N: "SM" refers to sadomasochism.
SM is my favorite hobby, so
I'm bursting with excitement!
Inspector Takashima's pervert switch flipped
Hey you - I like the way you're looking at me
Yeah
Please hit me with this
No, I'm okay
Please hit me with this
I'm okay
So, I uh...
Wait, Takashima
It won't hurt at all, so hit me
No way
Seriously?
Hit me harder
More!
I can't feel it, so hit harder!
Harder! Hit me for real! Harder! Good!
Tear my ass up until I pass out!
HIT ME HARDER!!
What was he saying?
He's perverted, seriously!
He's crazy!
Masahiro!
It's the night of New Year's Eve, what are you doing?
Really, what are you saying?
Scary
What kind of training did you do
What kind of training did you do to get those eyes?
You are totally a super masochist, right?
Uh... Is that so...
That is...
That's...
Anyway,
who is the culprit!!
Inspector Takashima
What is that stuck to your underwear?
That's the decoration from
the golden collar, isn't it?!!
A red feather only the culprit would have
Case Note
I don't know! Someone must have stuck it to me!
Come to think of it, when the crime occurred, you had left to buy cigarettes!
It's a coincidence that I left!
I've never seen someone run out of smokes with such precision!
You're the culprit!
You ungrateful little!
You fools! Get him out of here!
The real culprit was Inspector Takashima
Case Note
That's a great ending
I have a reputation to protect!!
What are you saying dressed like that!!
Shut up idiot!
No one could respect you, in your underwear!
This back and forth
The case is closed with this ending
Case Note
I know
A group of Happy Boys takes the stage
EVERYBODY COME ON
WOW!!
Thank You
ThankYou
WELCOME TO HAPPY BOY! We're here!
Kameda Family
Takashima Family
Okada Family
Where art thou?
Hey Hey
Doko ni itta? Where'd you go? Where'd you go?
This self deprecation is impressive
I'm not a Happy Boy now, I'm a Lonely Boy
All alone
Stupid Stupid Stupid
That aside
Takashima!! That's a great nude look!!
Excellent!!Come on!
Excellent!! Come on!
On New Year's Eve crawling on all fours
YAY
Takashima Family's disgrace
Even for my comedy training, I
Spank Spank Spank
Is this the time for that?!!
Moron!! Come on!
HAPPY BOY
WOW!!
What the hell is this?
Comedy training spank spank spank
It's good that he enjoys it so much!!
EVERYBODY
HAPPY BOY
WOW!!
Why?
I got it
Watching me bomb
Hey Hey
Look at me!! Look at me!!
(Just Okada) Not enough practice!!
Not enough practice!!
Man... How many times does he plan on turning around?
Really?
This year, Happy Boy is still happy, huh
6:00 PM - 10 hours have passed
And they're complaining about the physical punishments
What's wrong?
Muscle pain
Muscle pain? From what?
Yes
Muscle pain? From what?
Don't Get Caught
When they hit your butt, your whole upper half goes like this
You stiffen, yeah
Oh, how does it go?
It goes *slap* And then you go, "Ahh!"
Around here the muscle tightens up
When you do it over and over, your muscles become tense
If you did it 5 times in a row, what would that be like?
5 times would be like
Something like that, I think
But you wouldn't have to do it 5 times anyway
Yeah, that doesn't happen
If you did it 20 times in a row
I really wonder what would happen?
That would be amazing, really
It's because you did it that one time...
You get caught
They get you so quickly
...Like that, right?
T/N: He's referring to Beat Takeshi (comedian, actor, film director) who has facial spasms due to an accident.
Partway through, you turned into Takeshi-san
If you were going to turn into anyone, he was a good choice
Why don't you try becoming him? (Beat Takeshi)
Midway through, become more like him
Increasingly Takeshi Challenge
That would probably be good - 10 times
Increasingly Takeshi Challenge
And at the very end, you completely turn into Beat Takeshi
If you can make it all the way you could tour the country!!
Tour the country...?
Okay, I'll do it
You're already him, from the very start, though!!
Too fast!!
Really?
Ooooh yeah, you were way too fast
Yeah, you need to start as Endo- be more like Endo
What? But I wasn't being Takeshi just now
I was just saying "aah" like normal
No you weren't
So I need to start lower?
Increasingly Takeshi Challenge Do-Over
I think so
That's good
That was really good
What's wrong Endo?
What's wrong Endo, what's wrong?
My back...
During Absolutely Don't Get Caught they got his back
His back, huh?
They got his back bad
That's right
If they hurt his back that bad
we can't play with Endo anymore
No, no, it was a coincidence
Honestly, I kind of stiffened up
Coincidentally?
Yeah, I'm fine, I just stiffened up
Hey guys
Right now, in this very building
A world famous illusionist is doing
his big escape show, it seems
Since you're Treasure Hunters,
having some skills in escaping may be of some use to you
They will studiously observe the
world famous illusionist's big escape show!!
The five hurry to the show location
When suddenly
Everyone, could you wait here a moment?
That parade song echoes down the hall
Electrical parade?
What? Parade?
I've heard this song before...
Yeah, Electrical Parade
Again??
He's covered in lights
Robo-Ototake's 2nd Appearance!!
Come on, Ototake...
Why don't you go home already!!
The little ones are following him
Amazing
He's too into it, it's creeping me out
Oh they're so small!
Oh, what now?
That's amazing~
That's amazing
Why's this (power cable) so long?
That power cable is super long
A super long lighting cable
That's crazy long
Staff
Stop!!
Ototake-san
She said "Ototake-san, stop!!"
I heard that
Stop! Stop!
You guys are lucky, for sure.
That only happens once a month
This laboratory's specialty
Ototakelectrical Parade!!
Oh really...
Pretty lucky
He really wanted to be on that bad?
It creeps me out
Illusion Chamber
Take a seat
It's just us?
Escape Show
The special program's extravagant set
I thought there would be others here
Amazing...
Wow
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN
A new era of showtime is about to begin!
Welcome to an exciting evening
Ralph Suzuki
Presenter
Ralph Suzuki
Presenter
Everyone gathered here tonight,
You all will soon
Become witnesses to a historical moment
The man that continues to perform miracles around the world
Today, a great new escape will be revealed
And now
Without further delay
Let's call in the man himself
Hyper Escape Illusionist
David Kawashima will now appear!!
Gekidan Hitori
David Kawashima
T/N: Gekidan Hitori is a comedian who often appears in the Batsu.
Gekidan Hitori
David Kawashima
He just looks Chinese!
His face is dripping with confidence
Mr. David Kawashima welcome to Japan
It's an era-defining escape, how are you feeling right now?
That's right, thank you all...
He can speak Japanese!!
He's speaking Japanese
Japanese...
for coming to witness this miracle
With a smile, I hope I'll see you all again soon
And with that, we won't make you wait any longer
Showtime is starting!!
His face pisses me off
He's got the right fighting spirit
He can't make a mistake, no matter what...
Now, I will explain the escape process
First, both of David Kawashima's ankles
Will be fastened together
He must release himself
Underwater Escape Show
Both legs are fastened with padlocks
From the 2 padlocks on his legs
This is for real...
Next, David Kawashima
Has both hands fastened with weights
To escape these weights,
Underwater Escape Show
Each hand has 10kg attached with padlocks
T/N: 10kg is 22 pounds.
He will have to remove both padlocks
Wait, that's...
Wow, David Kawashima is amazing
The 4 keys are collected
Now, the keys will all be thrown into the water
Underwater Escape Show
The 4 keys are thrown in the water
Now
They have been thrown in
Now, David Kawashima
With the 4 padlocks in place,
enters standby
That seems to be pretty heavy
I think he looks determined
Turning to face his historic escape, he begins climbing the stairs
He moves heavily
You can hear the heft of his weights
His face is different than before
You can feel the tension in the air
You're right
And for the climax of this amazing escape
The lid will be closed on David Kawashima
And he will be chained in with another lock
Underwater Escape Show
The lid will be locked and the key thrown inside
With this key also thrown in
To summarize
First, David Kawashima will open 4 locks underwater
The David Kawashima Challenge
Remove the 4 padlocks on his arms and legs
Finally, using this hole which fits only one arm
Use the hole to open the 5th padlock
Lid Hole
He will extend his arm
He will unlock the chained padlock, and escape
5th padlock
Meeting the challenge of a historic illusion!
This is an amazing illusion
Everyone note,
You can confirm his actions from the camera installed above as well
Overhead Camera
And with that
Over there?
Yeah
Mr. David Kawashima, please enter the water
He's all the way in
Seriously?
Wow...
He's filling up
That's filled to the brim...
Yeah, it's perfectly filled
The preparations are all complete
Mr. David Kawashima, have you prepared yourself?
Understood
His face pisses me off...
Shouldn't he speak up a little more?
Right?
Well then, let's continue!
David Kawashima's
Era-defining
Underwater Escape Illusion countdown!
Underwater Escape Start!!
We have started, so now the lid is closed
Wow, he's doing it
And locked up with chains
The padlock has now been secured
And the key has been thrown in
And in that time, suddenly-
David Kawashima is on... his left wrist?
Is that his right wrist?
First is his right ankle
He's really calm, huh
How are we doing?
It's open
Slow and steady
You got this!!
Right, if he rushes it will be even worse
Next is his left wrist
But it's already been 30 seconds
Now, at 30 seconds
That's amazing!!
Can he do it?
Can you do it, David?
Did he get enough air?
Does he have enough breath?
Amazing
Does he have enough air left?
Let's go David!
That's incredible, though
His right wrist now, and it's off!
OK!
Wow
Now, now with the last of his breath - the last lock
Up up
The last lock
You're almost there, almost there David!
He can't reach!
He forgot the key, so
He dropped the key!!
This is bad, he's stuck!
David what's wrong?
BLACKOUT!!
That's dangerous
This is really dangerous
Is he alright?
ARE YOU OKAY? HANG IN THERE!
You can pretty much tell!!
GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF!
David is so stupid, seriously...
Get a hold of yourself!
What the hell...
He's an idiot if I ever saw one...
Plan this out ahead of time!
The padlock was too far from his reach!
He was doing well until then
I thought he could do it...
Well now
Right?
He did his best
That was incredible
He was even holding the key
That's right
I thought he could reach
That was great
That was great, really
Overhead Camera
He seems so lonely from behind
You guys don't know-
if something went wrong or not, though...
Maybe he was able to do it in other countries
It's like he let his first turtle go free
It looked like he was struck by calamity
His back, yeah
But
He's probably embarrassed, too...
Yeah, that's probably true
7:00 PM - Their next assignment is given to them
I have bad news everyone!!
Though she disappeared off the face of the earth for a while,
a legendary spirit medium has returned
So, let's go
To see into the hearts of the Treasure Hunters,
the legendary spirit medium is consulted
A spirit medium
In here
Hall of the spirit medium
Oh wow, what's this smell?
Everyone, please hurry inside
She will be here any moment, so please hurry
Butler
Kendo Kobayashi
Everyone please pay close attention
"She"?
As she enters, we ask that you
refrain from being rude, please
Legendary Spirit Medium
Rola
Hosei loves Rola, huh?
That's right
Hold on
I can't help but get a bad feeling from this...
It's kind of scary
Please, be seated
She's got a really dumb grin on her face
That spells trouble
Seriously?
The Zero-Tension Spirit Medium
She's not tense at all
Right?
This is
The legendary spirit medium, Mistress Rola
Mistress Rola, please share your wisdom with these men
The spirit medium's gracious wisdom
Aha!
We didn't ask for this
I'm begging you
Hang on!
Rola, I'm begging you - do this seriously
Today... Ah! Uh-uh
Today, Treasure HunTERS WILL
There's no way
This is impossible
She can't!
This is totally hopeless
The Spirit Medium That Can't Stop Laughing
Let's just keep going, okay?
First, let's start with
Hosei's fortune, please
Spirit Power #1
Seeing a Treasure Hunter's true nature
I have seen it
Hosei, what is your last name, again?
It's Tsukitei
I see
Why is "Tsukitei" what you call yourself?
As Master Happo's student, Tsukitei was the name I was given
Asster Happo's student?
What does that mean?
Asster Happo's student, that is?
Everyone
Mistress Rola can also cleanse people of malicious spirits
Yes
Mistress Rola, please look
Spirit Power #2
Detecting malicious spirit possessions
I understand
This person is possessed, right
Is that what you felt?
You felt that
Well then, Mistress Rola, if it's possessing Matsumoto, please cleanse the spirit
Spirit Power #3
Matsumoto's Evil Spirit Cleansing
Please
Cue Card
Health and Abandonment
"Health and Longevity", isn't it?
Body and Soul
All through creation, we pray for affection
Pray for harmony
Even on a watery-conscious level
Subconscious level
She got them all wrong!!
It's written down, too...
Can she not read?
She got it all wrong
Hot hot hot
Ah! Wait a minute, I feel a strong spirit
This person!!
You have a strong spirit haunting you
Really?
Tanaka has a spell chanted to cleanse his curse
Spirit Power #4
Hamusutora-nu
Namureho-ri-
Donkoroji-no
Colorado, Mississippi
Insi~de a mountain
She said "Insi~de a mountain"
Was that Japanese?
Insi~de a mountain
8:00 PM, 12 hours have passed
A venue where treasure hunters from all over the world gather
This bar is where they'll gather information about treasure
They go to collect information about treasure
At a bar where treasure hunters from around the world gather
Welcome
Bar
Wow, this is done so well
It's pretty nice
Up we go
So, everyone
Do your best to gather information about treasure please
Well...
I don't really get it
If we don't do anything, maybe we can leave
I wonder...
The temperature difference is intense
Bar Owner
Tomochika
This weather is unusual
"What am I going to wear?" they said
"A suit? A dress? A kimono?"
I'm very picky about this!!
THUMP
"With this here" I said
The construction hasn't been finished at all!
I called up Takenaka,
"It doesn't go thump, you know?" I said
"What thump?"
They've already laughed, but please enjoy watching for now
I told him, but he didn't pass it on
This is pretty handy here
"Thank you, Takenaka" I said
You get it, right?
Yuri-chan, we have customers
Yes!
Make sure you bring some alcohol
Bar Hostess
Yuriyan Retriever
T/N: Yuriyan Retriever is a Japanese comedian whose humor is to be really awkward and say odd things in English.
Good evening, excuse me
She's been here 3 months
I had just dropped out of college
If you hadn't found me...
By now I'd be a stray cat
Better than a thieving cat
T/N: In Japanese, "thieving cat" also means homewrecker.
You're the thieving cat!
I'm a Persian cat
This is annoying
I'm eating nuts, even though it's winter
T/N: Nuts are pronounced "nattsu". The word for summer is "natsu". So eating nuts in the winter/nuts aren't just for summer is a play-on-words.
It's not just for summer, like I say
That's silly~
Yuri-chan
Where did Takahashi go?
She's always playing hooky
Takahashi!!
Sorry it took me so long to get ready!
Bar Hostess
Takahashi Maryjun
T/N: Maryjun Takashi is a half Japanese, half Filipina model and actress.
Could you not take so long?
Good evening
You know, rather than remembering your job
It seems like you only remember to play with boys, huh?
That's not true, is it?
No
Yuri-chan, you know that, don't say such things
You say that, but I don't know
Hey you, I'm telling you
Yuri-chan, why don't you tell us something good about yourself?
Something good about me?
There aren't any...
Just try
Compared to others, your sitting height is tall
Please don't talk about my sitting height
Takahashi, try sitting down over there
Okay
Takahashi is good looking in every way
She's good on the inside, and she's tall
How about you both kneel
Your sitting height is so high~
The height difference is 20 cm
You don't even need to put on takageta,
T/N: Geta are a traditional Japanese sandals. Takageta are geta that are tall, kind of like platform shoes.
For you, the tall-sitting journey is possible
Listen, you can almost hear the bells and taiko drums
Ting Tong Shang, right?
A tall-sitter is passing through
Everyone in town, everyone in the village, gather round!
What are they saying?
Everyone in town, gather round~
Ya
If the mountain smiles, the grandchildren will turn around. Traditions continue
Ya
ma
ga
wa
ra
e
You're almost crying
e
ba
ma
go
ga
fu
ri
mu
ku
If the mountain smiles, the grandchildren will turn around. Traditions continue
De
n
to
u
ni
tsu
na
ga
t
Does this actually exist? This kind of folk song...
t
te
ku
Ki
By the time the goldfish jumps out of their bowl
Ki
n
gyo
ba
chi
no
ki
n
gyo
ga
ha
ne
ta
ra
Ma
The town will change color, the shamisen strums
T/N: The shamisen is a three-stringed traditional Japanese instrument.
Ma
chi
ga
i
ro
zu
ku
Chin
Ton
Shan
Aa
Aahh, I'm so glad I'm alive
Enough of this...
Aa
Wa
ta
shi
wa
i
ki
te
yo
ka
t
ta
Za
Let's embark a journey on sitting heights
Za
kou
dou
chuu
Ya
ri
ha
ji
me
Now Takahashi, go walk with no accompanying music
Na
ri
mo
no
na
ku
te
Ta
ka
ha
shi
a
ru
ke
BA
Take a candle with your hand like a drumstick
BA
CHI
wo
ka
ta
te
ni
RO
U
SO
KU
wo
mo
Do we really have to stay here?
mo
t
te
BA
And hit the drum with it, like a drumstick
BA
CHI
ga
wa
ri
ni
ta
i
ko
o
ta
ke
Chon
Bam, bam, just like that!
Chon
chon!
A
ra
yo!
Do
T/N: These lines don't really mean much, they're just words to sing to encourage the festival atmosphere.
Do
rai
yo
do!
Yo
t
to
ra
yo
t
to!
O
Oparaaa~
O
PA
RA~
O
Oparaaa~ bam bam bam!! Takahashi!!
RA~
O
PA
RA~
Wait wait wait
O
PA
RA
O
PA
RA~
I do not have a passport with me
Wa
ta
ku
shi
PA
SU
POO
TO
wa
mo
t
te
i
ma
sen
wa
What the hell is this...
Is it still okay if I don't have it with me?
PA
SU
POO
TO
na
ku
te
i
ke
run
de
su
ka
Wa
I'll throw all my clothes away
Wa
ta
shi
wa
su
be
te
wo
nu
gi
su
te
A
And I will answer your desire
A
na
ta
no
yo
k
kyuu
Come on...
kyuu
ni
wa
ta
ku
shi
ga
ko
ta
e
ma
su
Hai!
Alright, here's my turn now
Hai!
Wa
ta
ku
shi
no
de
ban
yo
Yo
do
ra
no
yo
do
ra
no
What world view is this?
no
Don
She likes this
Don
Don!
She really likes this stuff
Don!
Ko
And now it's time for my climax
Ko
ko
ka
ra
wa
ta
ku
shi
no
mi
se
ba
De
But I'm surrounded by enemies on all sides
De
mo
wa
ta
shi
no
a
i
da
wa
mou
te
ki
ba
kka
ri
I'm never coming back to this shop
ri
shi
men
so
ka
I agree
ka
Saa
I'm a fugitive now, I'll never show you my face
Saa
Wa
ta
shi
wa
tou
bou
sha
Ka
o
wa
ze
t
tai
mi
se
ma
sen
So
Please have Takahashi wear that
So
re
wo
Ta
ka
ha
shi
ni
ka
bu
se
na
sai
Ta
Maybe if Takahashi is going to wear it
Ta
ka
ha
shi
mo
Ko
re
wo
ka
bu
ru
ko
to
ni
yo
t
te
Cho
t
Her character might change a bit
t
to
jin
ka
ku
ga
ka
wa
c
chau
ka
shi
ra
Maybe I'll become an obscene woman...
Wa
ta
shi
wa
mi
da
ra
na
o
n
na
ni
na
ru
no
ka
shi
ra
Touch your own body with your hands, your bodyline
Te
de
ji
bun
no
ka
ra
da
BO
DI
RA
IN
wo
Saa
Come on, take a look, look at me
Saa
mi
te
Mi
te
Mi
te
Mi
te
The hell are you saying?
te
Mi
te
Mi
te
Mi
te
O
Boobs, boobs
Don't make her do lewd stuff
O
ppai
O
ppai
Mi
Right and left, right and left, left and right
Mi
gi
hi
da
ri
Come on, that's dirty
ri
Mi
gi
hi
da
ri
He's right
ri
Hi
da
ri
mi
gi
te
o
Tou
East, west, east, west, south, north, east, west, north, south
Tou
zai
tou
zai
Tou
zai
nan
bo
ku
Tou
nan
sha
be
O
Stick up your butt now and bam bam
O
shi
ri
wo
tsu
ki
da
shi
PON
Bam bam bam
PON
Yuri-chan, bam! Yuri-chan, bam!
Yu
ri-
chan
PON
Yu
ri-
chan
PON
Bam bam bam bam bam bam bam baam!
Let's stop this
Come on
PON
PO~N
O
Let's go back to the breasts once more
O
chi
ni
fu
ta
bi
mo
do
t
te
Chi
Titty-rain-shower!! Go!
Chi
chi
shi
gu
ree
Yoi!
Stop that, geez
Yoi!
Oo
We just fired a big firework
Oo
ki
na
ha
na
bi
ga
u
chi
a
ga
ri
ma
shi
ta
Are we done yet?
ta
Ah
Rub your breasts, grip your breasts
Ah
Chi
chi
mo
n
de
Ah
Please just go away
Ah
Chi
chi
wo
ha
sa
n
de
Tou
East, west, south, north, northnorthnorth
Tou
nan
sha
be
Be
Please go away
Be
Ta
Takahashi, Takahashi, keep on doing it
Ta
ka
ha
shi
Ta
ka
How long is this taking? Just go
ka
ha
shi
ya
t
to
re
yo
Takahashi?
They all got away, Takahashi
You're free to go
They got away
You can go
Takahashi
How long are you going to be doing that?
She's going now
Yeah
That's good news
Wha-?
Are you kidding me?
Come on
It was so long
Way too long
We had enough
What the hell? I mean
Not a single treasure hunter has come yet
Right
I hope Fujiwara will come here soon
Really, I had enough
Right
We all had enough
This isn't really treasure hunter-ish
Welcome
Can we sit?
Of course
We'll take the usual then
Ok, got it
Treasure Hunters Nao Hashimoto Kazuhiro Unagi Abe Kouji Gin-Shari
T/N: Gin-Shari are a manzai comedic trio.
Man, I'm beat up
Yeah, for real
Yeah...
The situation is pretty tough
There's not a single spot left
Treasure Hunter Yuichi Kimura
T/N: Yuichi Kimura is a comedian, actor, TV script writer, and columnist.
They dug everything out
Sorry I'm late
Good evening
Kept you waiting?
We knew you would come
Doesn't seem like we'll retire any soon, huh?
The treasure hunters are facing hard times
Yeah, what can we do?
We just run out of luck
Yeah but
The research group of a guy I know recently went to Africa
And managed to dig up so much gold, he made a fortune worth his lifetime
Oh man
Speaking of making a fortune... The Japanese comedian Hitoshi Matsumoto too...
I heard he made an unbelievable fortune
Well, if we're talking about him, he made a fortune cause he earned it, you know
Kimura-san, do you happen to know Matsumoto-san, by chance?
Well, kind of, yes
Can I ask you a question?
What is it?
He once wrote in one of his books "a comedian must not work out"
But now, he's so muscular, isn't he? What do you think that means?
I don't think that working out is something bad, you know
Yeah, but in his book...
We all read it
You mean "Will", his book? He's just joking around, come on
Asahi Press "Will" by Matsumoto Hitoshi
"Will" / Hitoshi Matsumoto (1994)
Oh, I see
Yeah, but he also said
"If a comedian dyes his hair, he'll stain himself." That's also part of the book he wrote
In "Will", yes?
But isn't he excessively blonde right now...?
What does that mean, you think?
I think that the whole "stain" thing is just a concept, you know
Some believe that people who dye their hair blonde have stained themselves
But that doesn't mean blonde = stain
It's between the lines
The lines..?
Yeah, something in between
You think Matsumoto is stained right now?
No, I don't think so
"I'm going to retire by the time I'm 40." That's written in his book too
"Will", right?
But isn't he 55 by now?
What does it mean?
It's "Will", you know, it's as if he's planning to die, you know
He wrote that thinking "I could die at any time"
He was 9 years away from his 40s, that's why he thought that
But now he's 55, so maybe he'll postpone (his retirement) to his 60s and so on, like this
I have a question about Hamada...
Why is Hamada always wearing a pair of sunglasses?
How would I know?
There's a difference in interest
I knew he was gonna say it
He knows only about me
I'm his favorite topic
Even people who aren't Hamada...
Not Hamada, though
About Hamada, again...
When they press him to do his recording, why does he get so angry about it?
I don't know man, ask him yourself
He's brutal
Yeah, why?
He's so different when it comes to Matsumoto-san
He really likes him
So different when it's about Matsumoto-san
That's impressive
You should just ask him
Doesn't he really care?
I'm positive he doesn't hate him
Yeah, no way
He doesn't
Back on Matsumoto-san again... back when he used to do"Gottsu ee Kanji" and so
His personality was more prickly
But now especially with younger comedians, he's always joking around or such
He speaks with no formalities too
What do you think that means?
He's been a kind person from the beginning...
What with these feelings?
He's getting emotional
That's no good
All the way down his roots, he's a kind person
Back from when he did Gottsu?
I personally never thought of him as a prickly person
The staff often said to him like
"You seem to be in good spirits today" or such
"He's always like this!" - that's what I always thought
He's not the kind of person who works based on mood, after all
2 years after my comedy debut, during the last act of a show
I was replying to him without much thought
He snorted in a laughter
And asked me "How long have you been doing this?"
I said "It's been 2 years"
He said "Your answers are good enough if you're on your second year"
"But there's no way you're fine with 'good enough'"
I thought he was expecting so much from me
He always treated you well, didn't he?
What kind of segment is this?!
Memo about his memories with Matsumoto
Is this a note about your memories with him?
That's right
You even wrote down Mr. Hitoshi, huh...
"The origin of kindness"
Oh, that's the title?
He even wrote down "Brother's!" in here
This...
I don't really want to read this
Of course you don't
He's serious about it
You can tell it
He's really serious about this
He's getting emotional for real
Yeah
He's conveying his feelings so well
Feels like this isn't a business anymore
It's been 13 hours since the start, the 5 of them are covered in wounds
And finally Hosei's arch-enemy will make his appearance!!
14 hours since their work started
Our five heroes are so exhausted they barely even talk, but...
A big event will shake the research institute! The greatest discovery of this century!
You ok?
Announcement
State of emergency! The cursed mummy of the Hipopo tribe has been found!
The cursed mummy of the Hipopo tribe has been found!
Everyone in this facility, please gather in the auditorium at once!!
Oh, the mummy which was stolen
Guys
The Hipopo tribe's mummy was...
The cursed mummy seems to have been found!!
Let's move from here
Yessir!!
Huhu...
State of emergency
Cursed mummy was found - to the auditorium!!
Let's go
You just laughed there
Hamada
That was funny, but...
You should've gotten OUT
Look, as expected...
The facility's staff have all been gathered here in a familiar environment
It's already been found so does it matter?
Ow ow ow...
Whew
Once again...
Everyone
Head researcher
Hakata Daikichi
This is a great find of this century
The cursed mummy which that infamous John Wood III stole from the Hipopo tribe
Yes, that cursed mummy has been discovered
The Hipopo tribe's cursed mummy has been discovered!!
Good for you
I wasn't the one who discovered the cursed mummy
It was discovered by a highly reputable independent treasure hunter. Here he comes!
Well, we all know what happens once this music plays...
Yeah
God damn!
Independent Treasure Hunter
Chono Masahiro
barges in!!
What the hell?
Why is he angry?
They've found it already, right?
I don't get it...
Yeah
This time
I unearthed
the mummy which cursed John Wood III to death
This mummy is very dangerous
Hey, bring that in
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The cursed mummy is moved in
How did the thief even steal that thing?
Inside this, there exists the
mummy of Hipopo tribe, which cursed John Wood III to death
According to our research, we understand that
the Hipopo tribe's curse
is passed down to descendants, generation to generation
And
We have an important announcement here
Among the treasure hunters here
There is someone who has inherited the mummy's curse
that is, we understand that he is a descendant
Among the treasure hunters present, there is a descendant
We must find that descendant
and end the chain of curses
Hey!
Among the people here, there's a descendant of the Pipopo tribe
Chono-san, it's Hipopo tribe
Shut up
"Shut up"
Hey!
Who is it?
No one's speaking up?
Someone tell him
Hey!!
We'll use that method!!
Yes
Hey!
The search for the descendant who inherited the curse... What method will be used?!
Now, we will undo the bandages on the cursed mummy
From investigating his body-shape and facial structure
the descendant can be found easily
Chono-san
Method for finding the descendant
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Undoing the mummy's bandages to confirm the body's shape and face
Please undo the bandages
We won't know if we don't unwrap his face
That's right
Come on, please don't do this
Yeah, I agree
Like an unexpected twist or anything like that
Seriously, come on...
He has hair
There's no knowing yet
SECRET
There's no knowing yet
The one who has a similar face to this mummy is the descendant
We all knew it'd be him though
Well, yeah
Yeah
Hey you, Hamada, who is this?
Yes
Who is this?
I think that's probably Yamasaki...
No it is not!!
That's Hamada!!
He looks exactly like Hamada!
You're stretching it
No matter how I look at him, he looks like Hamada!!
You're wrong
That's definitely Hosei
Come over here right in front of this mummy!!
That's your face
No, it's totally different
Go there and if it's not you then
Yeah
you can clear the air
This year
you definitely have to tell them that's not you
Lining up next to the mummy to be interrogated
This is you!
No, he doesn't look like me at all
His hair's also totally different from mine...
The chain of curses has been continuing
Do you get it?
Where is this curse from? What country is it from?
From the Hipopo tribe
Oh, then you've got the wrong person
Because I'm from Saga prefecture!!
T/N: Saga prefecture is in the northwest part of the island of Kyushu. Except Hosei is actually from Hyogo prefecture, so not sure why he's saying he's from Saga.
You liar! Of all things though, why would you lie about that??
Right?
What was I thinking?
Why not just go with Hyogo prefecture?
Why Saga prefecture?
Saga?!
I'm from Saga prefecture, my dad's from Saga prefecture
When did it become the Hipopo tribe?
Huh?!
You have been cursed!!
Me?
You want to break the curse right?
Yes, I want to break the curse
Do you want to know how to break it?
I want to know!!
The Holy Slap
He actually said it
It's all the same in the end
Look
I want to free you
from the curse
That curse will spread
even to your friends
over there
We don't want that
Do you understand?
We'd be troubled by that
Yes, we don't want the curse
I will carry the cross
and watch over what will happen to them
What the hell are you saying?
Don't play stupid!
"What the hell are you saying?"
What the heck was he saying?
He was told "What the hell are you saying?"
There is another way
Hey! Bring that in!!
What was brought in was the Golden Holy Grail
Method for breaking the curse
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
They say pouring Holy Water into the grail and drinking it all will break the curse
Pour Holy Water into the Golden Holy Grail and drink all of it
Good news for Hosei this year
No need for a slap this year
That means if I drink this water...
That's right
Really?
It's true
Will you do it?
Yes! I'll do it!
Thanks
Thank you very much!!
Thank you
That sounds good
Good luck!!
Good luck!
Filling the Golden Holy Grail with Holy Water
That's a lot
That seems impossible...
It probably contains around 2 liters?
T/N: 2 liters is roughly half a gallon for those who use freedom Imperial units.
That's quite...
You just need to finish drinking the Holy Water
If I really manage to finish drinking, there will be no slap
That's right
You must drink it all in one go!!
With this Holy Water, once you stop, it won't work even if you retry
In order to avoid the slap, he must drink it all in one go
Do you get it?
Yes
Okay, now recite "Oh curse, be gone" 3 times
Then you drink
Okay
You can do it
Okay
Oh curse, be gone
In a loud voice!
And then one more time!
Oh curse, be gone!!
Oh curse, be gone
In a loud voice!
And then one more time!
Oh curse, be gone!!
Wait a sec, what the hell are you doing?
The Holy Grail is unexpectedly heavy
Well, yeah...
He said it so casually...
T/N: Hamada is referring to Chono's Japanese being in a rude and harsh casual way of speaking towards Hosei.
It was funny
"Wait a sec, what the hell are you doing?" Pfft...
He already knows, right?
It was heavier than I thought it would be
Try carrying it up
up from below like this
Right, that's it
That's right
Do it like that. Here
Okay
Good luck
Yes
Do you get it?
Yes!
You're doing great
Don't spit it back out!
You can do it
You can do it!
Don't spill it, c'mon, Hosei!!
Stop! Stop!
Bleurgh
It's an impossible task
Just how much water does it hold?
Hosei, wait just a sec
It got all over his face...
He's all soaked through though
The next failure won't be tolerated
Got it
Do it in one go!!
In one go!!
All right!
Yes!
Again!
All right!!
I drank it all!! I drank it all!!
All right!!
I drank it all!! I drank it all!!
What the hell?
I finished drinking it all!
What a pathetic man
All right!
Hell yeah!!
The curse is gone!!
Thank you very much!!
Hey wait. Wait a sec, I say!!
What are you gonna do about this?
This is Holy Water, y'know!!
What do you think?
"What do you think?"
What do you think?
"What do you think?"
That was an impossible task. I appreciate your effort
But I said it had to be in one go, didn't I?
Burp
Come back up
This hasn't changed anything
To release the curse the Holy Slap is required
You'll be taking it
Got it?
Wait a minute
What's up?
He (Tanaka) is the culprit
That
Wha-?
What does he mean "culprit"?
What is "culprit" even supposed to mean?
Hey, you Hipopo descendant! Get over here!!
Why is he a Hipopo?
I'm not a Hipopo
So, which tribe are you from?
I don't...
OH, YOU WON'T TELL US!!
You won't tell us, because you're a Hipopo!!
I'M GONNA KICK YOU TO DEATH, ASSHOLE!!
What are you talking about?
He's not killing anyone!
What position does he think he's in?
He looks like one
But I'm not
Seriously, what are they talking about
Hosei
No, I'm not!
This planet, this world, and everyone in it is depending on you!
What do you think?
Each tell wadju...
What do you think?
Stop yapping and just get it over with already!
Each of you tell me what you think!!
This is so annoying
I don't understand the question, either
It really is different this year
Isn't it?
Yes
You're our only hope
Nn...
Okay
Nnn...
Right
Because he's a hero!!
This time at least
Not very heroic, though
He's a hero!
Let's go
Nn...
Hey!
Yes
Now, I will expel the curse!
Yes
Now, I will expel the curse!
yeah- okay
Okay?
Finally the moment of the Holy Slap
Let's go!
Drive it out!
The curse!
One
Two
SLAP
Three!
SLAP
Three!
The curse-expelling Holy Slap explodes!!
SLAP
It was good this time
That was clean
GODDAMN
That was a good slap~
He got him good
What a good slap
That was good
This year was a good slap for sure
It went "smack!"
That air time was pretty good, too
That expression, too
It's a new day
16 hours since the beginning
A bothersome incident erupts
Everyone
This is important
They discovered some buried treasure and now the wild exploration team and the savage pirates are fighting
The precious archaeological site could be destroyed
Could you mediate the situation?
Alright, let's go!!
After discovering buried treasure
the pirates and exploration team have created an explosive situation
We're going
I don't really...
He really wants to, huh?
He really wants to
The 5 get on the bus, hurrying to the scene
Ow ow ow ow
Even on the bus, Matsumoto's worries continue to brew...
Are you really that worried?
I AM worried!!
When we get there, do you think we'll even be able to do anything?
What are you saying, we don't have any other choice!
If we can somehow negotiate with them, we can't pass up that opportunity
What are you thinking?
What are you thinking? Seriously...
What are you thinking?
Seriously, what are you thinking??
Seriously...
Seriously, what are you thinking?
Seriously!!
What are you thinking
Since they were in transit, there was no punishment
That was an incredible waste of effort
Pirate hideout
That's really noisy
They fight like this every year
You guys!! You're crazy!!
The mood is dangerously tense
We're serious!
HEY UESHIMA!!
Degawa Squad Leader Degawa Tetsuro
That buried treasure is ours, damnit
It doesn't belong to you asshole pirates
Yeah that's right!
GOT IT ASSHOLE?
If you punks are going to talk like that
Ueshima Squad Leader Ueshima Ryuhei
Why don't you idiots put your lives on the line for it?
Bring it!
A reaction showdown!!
Instagrammable, this year is Instagrammable!!
Averaging 46 years old, a bunch of comedians!?
A battle of pride begins with their body on the line
Returning this year
The comedians' showdown with their body on the line
Begins!
We're gonna beat the shit out of you!
That's my line, shithead!
Harada Ryuuji is in there
Ueshima Squad Harada Ryuuji
T/N: Harada Ryuuji is a famous actor who played in roles like Kikaider Reboot and the Aibou movies.
Oh wow, it really is
For real?
Who would've thought he'd be here?
This time we'll show you the spirit of the pirates!
He's the first one ready for battle
HEY HEY HEY
The sea level is rising, assholes!
He got ready super fast
Aren't you stripping?
Oh give it a rest
We're waiting for you!
Can we start things off on our side?
Degawa Squad Adviser Komoto Junichi
Bring it out!
Yeah!
Nice, here it comes~
Alright let's go!
Let's go
Now
Using these two halves of a bowl, within 1 minute
Degawa Squad's Pride
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Within 1 minute , use this perfectly split bowl
to eat an entire bowl of piping hot soup without spilling any
You must eat an entire bowl of piping hot pork miso soup without spilling
That's impossible!
The name is
Eat from a bowl that's split-in-half!!
Degawa Squad Haranishi Takayuki
The most passionate, Haranishi!
Come on up!
Our fighting spirit is on another level,
I'll show you how it's done!!
Firmly hold it (the bowl) together!!
I am!
Eat all the pork miso soup!!
I've got it!
Okay, here we go!
More?
Fill it
Still more?
Hot!
Are you good? You going?
You got it!
No way!
AAAAAAAAAAAAA
Keep going, you can do it!
HOT!!
They keep saying how crazy hot it is, though
HOT HOT
What are they doing?
HARANISHI, THAT'S NOT HOT!!
It's not hot!
Haranishi, you can do it!
UWAAAAAAA
HOOOOT!
IT'S HOT!
Of course it is
We told you it was hot!
It is what it is!!
Good try Haranishi!
Only Haranishi could do that
They say that like they have no choice...
Degawa Squad Komoto Junichi
Ueshima Squad Iwao Nozomu
1v1 Showdown
Next, Komoto and Iwao face off head-to-head
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Waist-Tie Soccer Match
In 2 minutes, they must score a goal using the cleats tied to their waist
Using the cheaply made cleats hanging from their waists
They will play a game of soccer against their opponent
Time limit is 2 minutes- you ready?
Get him, Komoto!
Yeah, you've got this!
You go!
That's good
Yeah, go for it!
That's not good
It's going, it's going!
What the hell is this?
GO KOMOTO!
GO GO GO!
He finally hit it
GO GO GO
What is this?
Shoot it in!!
His back...
He looks so tense
Oh no...
You can do it!
Oh no
Keep going!
Looks rough
Is it really that difficult to play?
That's definitely hard
He hasn't moved at all from there!!
For real
He isn't moving at all
What is he doing?
You can do it!
Okay, let's go
Komoto with a leg cramp
Get a goal!
You can do it!
Iwao has a chance
owowowowowow
Iwao has a chance!
He does
One on one!
What the hell...
That was a good fight!
This battle ends in a draw, it seems
NICE FIGHT NICE FIGHT
That was no good
Jun-chan has really gotten himself in quite the situation
It still hasn't stopped at all!
What is happening to him?
He's cramped up
It's a cramp
He's even good when he's cramping
Aquarium-Head Challenge
Next, the one taking on the aquarium-head challenge
Hey, new guy!
Yup!!
Our new guy is buff, huh
He's always craving high quality protein
With an aquarium on his head-
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ueshima Squad's Pride
With his head in an aquarium, he'll eat all of the raw eggs
If we drop in raw eggs, he'll eat it all up
There's no way!!
No way
Can you?
Yeah
You can, huh
Why though?
Why isn't the new guy saying anything?
Why?
You ready, new guy?
Let's go!
How about it, new guy?
You want some protein?
He's scared of it!
They're putting in eggs?
① Add water up to the mouth and take a breath
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
They stopped quickly, huh
Once he takes a breath we'll finish filling it
Don't chicken out!
② Add the rest of the water, and then a raw egg
Ready, set
Eat all 5 eggs, now
Eat it! Eat it, asshole!
It'd be great if he got it
Eat it!
Oh no
He lost it
He got one, though~
He got it in
Great stuff
Alright
How about that
It's about time for this year's first look!!
What's that?
Bring it out!!
What is it?
The hell is that?
Wow~ That's a huge contraption
Something amazing came out
How do you react?
Costing 2,000,000 yen -------- Human Centrifuge Machine
T/N: 2,000,000 yen is roughly $18,536.
Equipped with 8 CO2 cylinders
By jet power, a great deal of rotational speed is produced
Degawa Squad
Komiya Hironobu
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Degawa Squad's Pride---------
He'll eat an entire bowl of piping hot New Years soba while it gyrates
The five view from special seats
Komiya's preparations are complete!!
Piping hot New Years soba coming right up!
Let's do it!
Wait
Hang on
Wait a second
You got this?
Let's do it!!
How will it rotate?
Alright!
Hell yeah!
There's no way I'd do this
This is insane
Is this okay?
IZ HOT
"Iz hot"?
He's actually eating it!
He's pretty good, right?
Wait
Is he eating it all?
IT'S HOT!!
Stop~
Very nice
That's was scary
You really did it
Great job Komiya
Amazing...
Ueshima Squad
Abareru-kun
While spinning, he'll eat an entire pot of New Years soba
As for Ueshima Squad, Abareru-kun is up next to challenge the soba
Let's go!! Abareru!!
Yeah!
It's because they tilt
Wow that's fast
Hang in there a little longer!
He's eating
Superb!
I don't get it at all
That was good, Abareru!
Alright, we win!!
Your damn grumbling is getting on my nerves
So let's end it with this
With what?
Let's do it
Bring it out!!
Let's go
Huh, what's this?
Huh?
It changed?
It's back
This year, though our final showdown has arrived- But before that
The tragedy of 2017- do you all remember it?
What was that?
Both leaders
Were supposed to blow air up their asses and arm wrestle
The first one to fart lost
You seriously need to quit that
That showdown to not fart first was
ultimately canceled because of reasons!!
Shit
Relax
What?
A new contest was created!!
Oh?
It's called
Scrotal Tug of War
Ueshima Ryuhei
Degawa Tetsuro
Legendary Scrotal Tug of War Showdown
Ueshima Ryuhei
Degawa Tetsuro
I'm gonna tear your balls off!
That's my line, asshole
My balls are the one thing I know I can trust
This is the finale
Let's go!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------| -----------------------------------------------------------------------|
The clothespins are snapped onto the balls for tug of war
Bring out the balls
Is this okay?
What are they showing us?
What's wrong, Koumoto?
It's so stiff...
Leaders-
The balls are so receded it's like nothing's there
Difficulty clipping to the testicles
I can't get it on, it's so tight
There's no loose skin
Hey!
Do you have warm water or something?
The hell do you mean, warm water?
To soften it up!
Hot water is prepared quickly
Sorry, excuse me
Loosen up
Excuse me, excuse me
HOT!!
This is still before the showdown has even started, too!
Hurry it up
Shut the hell up!!
I'm loosening up my balls!
Why?
Hurry up!
Okay...
Let's go
Let's go, I'm good!!
You got this!
Yeah
Alright!
I got it on there good!
Hurry up!
Hurry up, our leader's already attached!
Both sacks attached and ready
I'm already hooked up!
BRING IT
Ow ow ow ow ow ow
Wait a second! Ow ow ow
Come over here, you bitch!
Oooooooooooooooooh
Bring it out!!
Bring what out?
There's not enough weight
Plastic bottles for weight
Let's go with that
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------|
The weight is increased for both contestants
Slowly, do it slowly
Slowly?
Yes
Uwaaaaa!!
1:30 in the morning - while their next job is being prepared, the five are on standby in their room
Its been 17 hours and 30 minutes since the start
Aaaaaaah
Hey, Endo, why don't you sing a little for us?
Sing?
What kind of song should I sing?
Honestly, anything is fine
KO
TSU
KO
TSU
to
A
SU
FA
RU
TO
ni
ki
za
mu
KO
Beating out on the asphalt
TSU
KO
TSU
to
Dragonfly (Nagabuchi Tsuyoshi)
A
SU
FA
RU
TO
ni
ki
za
mu
A
shi
o
to
wo
fu
mi
shi
me
ru
ta
bi
ni
A
The sound of my steady steps
shi
o
to
wo
fu
mi
shi
me
ru
ta
bi
ni
To stay true to myself
O
re
wa
o
re
de
a
ri
tsu
zu
ke
ta
i
O
re
wa
o
re
de
a
ri
tsu
zu
ke
ta
i
That's all I've ever wanted
So
u
ne
ga
t
ta
So
u
ne
ga
t
ta
U
ra
ha
ra
na
ko
ro
ta
chi
ga
mi
e
te
U
I see people acting like they're somebody else
ra
ha
ra
na
Matsumoto joins in
ko
ro
ta
chi
ga
mi
e
te
Ya
ri
ki
re
na
i
yo
ru
wo
ka
zo
e
Ya
I count the nights that I can't stand to go on
ri
ki
re
na
i
yo
ru
wo
ka
zo
e
No
ga
re
ra
re
na
i
ya
mi
no
na
ka
de
Trapped in the inescapable darkness
No
ga
re
ra
re
na
i
ya
mi
no
na
ka
de
Kyo
u
mo
ne
mu
t
te
fu
ri
wo
su
ru
Kyo
Even today, I only pretended to sleep
u
mo
ne
mu
t
te
fu
ri
wo
su
ru
Shi
ni
ta
i
ku
ra
i
ni
a
ko
ga
re
ta...
So much that I could die
Shi
ni
ta
i
ku
ra
i
ni
a
ko
ga
re
ta...
I wondered who would join in
It would suck if too many joined in
It's kind of like, how is this going to go?
It was quick
It was over quickly
You say that, but
It's not easy
Huh
Uwah!
Uwa
Sudden Blackout
Uwa
Scary
Uwa
Scary
Uwa
Scary
Uwa
Scary
Uwa
No more, no more!
There it is again
No more, no more!
Uwa
Scary
Ow
Hosei and Endo
Ow
Hosei and Endo
They've been taken
A jacket?
That spooked me
Oh wait... Are we supposed to wear this?
Jackets and towels on the desks
What's with the towel?
Meanwhile, Hosei and Endo...
Meanwhile, the vanishing Hosei and Endo
Hey!
HEY!
Scary Scary Scary Scary
Awww not again...
Just where are they going...?
And then
They sure went out of their way to film this
Hello hello madam of the apartment complex
The inside of your mouth has has saliva that is perfect
Hello hello master of the apartment complex
There he is
Indeed
The bad breath within your mouth is perfect
Wild bomb
Cookie
T/N: Cookie is from the comedy duo, Yasei Bakudan. He regularly appears in the last segment of the Batsu games with really bizarre dialog and art.
Wild bomb
Cookie
Dear audience
I hope you are all in high spirits
My, my
It has become quite noisy as of late
As if you were all a child looking for a teat to suckle on
Those eyes...
I want it...
I want iiiiit!!
Garittochuu
Fukushima Yoshinari
T/N: Garittochuu is a comedy duo with Yoshinari as one of the members.
That's disgusting
So,
My important friends Hosei and Endo-kun
My minions have taken them away
You must hurry and save them
The jeans they've gotten wet
will become frozen~!
The side of your face goes buzz buzz buzz knockout!
T/N: "Bun bun" is a Japanese onomatopoeia for buzzing sounds while beating someone up or punching them is "bun-naguri". There really was no way to make sense out of it and it's just a really crappy pun.
Hahahahahaha
What the hell is this?
So in order to do that
I think you will have quite the adventure
looking for the treasure!
Isn't that right Mr.Bird
From here on out in the pitch black darkness
the legendary hidden treasure, "Golden Skull"
will be what you seek
After this, from here on out
you are allowed to laugh, however
you'll be OUT if you get startled
Nnn~
Kiss
You'll be OUT
There it is
Again it's Tanaka
I'll be more careful this time
Could you not swing your elbow at our face like you usually do?
Yeah, the "uwaah" and then "bang"
Dark blood just spilling out of our noses
Absolutely not
Special Late Night Rules
Absolutely Must Not Get Scared
Treasure Hunter
Currently confined to this place
Kidnapped Hosei and Endo are confined to this place
I get it, I get it I get it!
Heeey
They went again
In order to save Endo and Hosei they have to find the legendary hidden treasure
Leaving on a rescue mission
I have a bad feeling about this
Floor Corridor
Let's work together, alright?
We're always working together
If we're not together we're on our own
No, that's not right
I often take the lead, don't I?
It's because you're young
But still...
That's completely different
Woah
Again...
Huge
Present box
That damn big thing is scary...
That's a present
That's a present box, right?
There are standing spots
Please wait here after lining up
Wait, why am I in the middle?
Why?
Nnya
Woah!
The hell?
It's because he let out a strange sound
Cookie
You are humbly offered
a present from myself
Please open the lid
Tanaka
Me?
It's fine
Let's open it all together
If Matsumoto gives me a hand, then sure
But I have stiff shoulders
You can still open this though, right?
How do we do it?
Like this
Just do it in one move?
Something was ejected from the box
Stop doing that
Oh man...
Stop that
Damnit, Tanaka
What is this?
Cookie
Please pick it up
What?
Present from Cookie
What is this?
These are the bangs from the former
volleyball world prince Kawai Shunichi
Photo: Afro Sports
whose parents manage a tonkatsu restaurant
That's what it is
This part here
Is that so?
His parents manage a tonkatsu restaurant huh?
First time I've heard that
Same
Floor
It's probably a lot easier being captured
Yeah
There's a sign saying, "Wait Here"
This is gonna be scary
Yeah
Count down until the prank seconds left
Over here?
WAAAHHHHHHH
Yeah, look at that!
Something fell from the ceiling
Stop doing that!!
Anyone would startle
This would startle anyone!
A half-used tube?
That's weird!
It came from above, I don't understand this
I didn't know what it was, so I got startled!
Wouldn't you be startled
by something unknown!
What is it?
What is this?
Present from Cookie
This is the leftover hair gel used by
Kawai Shunichi,
whose parents manage a tonkatsu restaurant
Amazing
Amazing, isn't it?
WHAT!?
A group of men with painted faces attack Tanaka
What!?
Save me...
WHAT!?
EH?
What? Wait a second
What are you doing!?
Cold cold cold
No one should be startled like that
Something like that...
He got pushed away
What's that?
It is the finished image of Kawai Shunichi
You've been given bangs
I've been given bangs
The remainder of the gel was used to complete Kawai Shunichi's hair
Now that I think about it, you always get these kinds of treatments
Yes, I do, I do, it's so surpising
That's right, so violent
Confinement Room
These two are anxious about something
Downtown are 55 years old
Yeah
When you look at Hamada-san from the side...
The dented area of his eyes really shows his age...
When he is really tired
His eyelids make him look 5 times older...
That means he is human after all
Seems so
He needs to accept that and connect with the next generation
What's up with this?
Ahh...
Floor Entrance
They really have it easy
Is this the pattern of going outdoors?
Wow, it does seem like the outdoors pattern
Wait, what are you doing?
Tanaka making the two seniors go forward as shields
What are you doing, pushing us?
Scary
Creepy
I just got startled by the Heipo statue
Well, we---
Woah
What?? What???
That was sudden
A voice is heard coming from the truck
That's right
Save me
Save me~
Wait
It's Heipo-san, right?
Save me
What
Woah
Heipo
wrapped in a mat made of reeds
Help me, quick!
Heipo-san!
What's wrong, Heipo?
Please
Please release me quickly
Let's get him out
That's right
Heipo!!
I'm scared, please save me
What's up with this
Ha Ha Ha Hawoaaahh
Alright alright
What happened?
I was wrapped up
Wrapped up?
Wrapped up, right?
Rescuing wrapped up Heipo
It's good that it's Heipo though
Yeah
Ehh what do I do now!?
Riding in a truck with Heipo in bad weather
Pursuing the hidden treasure with rigorous commitment
After adding an easily scared man to the team,
they commit to pursuing the hidden treasure
Aaahhhhhhh
It's just shaking
It is a car after all
No!
There is no such thing
But... There is, isn't there?
Heipo and Tanaka together is...
Yeah, just give us a break
I hate being sandwiched between these two
I'm scared!
I get that
The truck arrives at its destination
We're here
We arrived
We stopped
The car stopped
When I was getting wrapped up they said, "Show them this"
You should've said that sooner
What the hell
The contents of the letter are...
The four of you have to go to the shrine that is further ahead in darkness. Attain the Gold Skull and the stone slabs that lead the way
Stone slab?
Get the stone
Let's go then
Could the three of you go please?
Why
Are you fine with being here all by yourself?
Scary, that's scary
Emergency
Four of them aim for the shrine
Find the stone slab that will lead to the hidden treasure!!
Truck
Destination
From the truck's location to the shrine it's about 300 meters which is about a 10 minute walk
From the truck to the shrine
is about a 10 minute walk
However, during the walk...
Pitch black darkness
Ow, ouch!
From here on out four of them are equipped with a camera that can film even in the dark
Into the world of darkness
There's a sense of evil
[Matsumoto] Heipo, you coming?
[Heipo] No no no, I don't wanna go
No no no
The beginning of the perilous tunnel
A tunnel?
It is a tunnel!
It's definitely impossible
They said four people, so we have no choice
[Heipo] Aaaaaaaaaa
I don't like this
C'mon Heipo
It is certainly impossible to do it alone
This is bad, bad, bad
[Heipo] This is absolutely impossible
Because we are shooting with a special camera it looks bright
Oooh, I see!
Their field of vision
is almost zero
I couldn't see anything
[Hamada] This is horrible
Stone slab
Scary
Empty can prank in seconds
This is...?
This would be scary
Scary, scary, scary
Right?
Why are you so loud?
Aaahhhhh
Ahhh!!
What is it? WHAT IS IT??
SOMETHING'S THERE
THERE WAS SOMETHING THERE!!
What what what
What?
Please save me...
Something grabbed my leg
Is there someone there?
I'm scared
I told you I heard clanking
Something grabbed me
I saw it with my own eyes
You really can't see anything
You're right
You really can't
I'm blind
Do you see people's shadows ahead?
What is it?
Human Shadows Ahead
That's scary
It was a little scary
That's scary isn't it
What's happening?
It's actually an old woman holding a baby
No no no no nooo
That's enough
It was scary, but we couldn't see her
Aaaahhhhhh Aaaaahhh
You couldn't see
You really couldn't see
Heipo, what is it?
There's something AAHHH
Let's go
It's all black and white, so you can't tell what's there
It's so hard to see
It would be nice if they lit her up with a lantern or something
Look it's moving!!
Ahhhhh AHHHHH
Shut up, Heipo
Who is it? Who is it?
Who's there?
AHHHHHH
Who is it? I can't see a damn thing!
What? WHO?
AHHHhhh What is this?
That's so scary
Scary scary scary
I can't see I can't see
You really couldn't see
It's a ghost!
WHAT WHAT
It was the ghost of an old woman
An old woman? What the heck
It was an old woman, didn't you see?
That's scary
I want to stop!
Creepy, right?
Ahhh! I hate it! I hate it! I'm leaving!
Where are you going?
I wanna go home
What the hell are you saying... I'll kill you!!
Why the hell are you saying you want to go home?
It's too dark, I can't do this
Abandoned Trash
I can't see anything
I really can't see
I can't see
Without the lanterns we'd be totally blind
It's really dark
At this time of night there's no way I can see in front of me
Of course these four can't see it
This is a mountain, inside the mountain
That's right
It's pitch black...
Pitch black
It's scary, I can't see
This is dangerous
I'm no good at thi- Ah?
SOMETHING'S HERE
AAAaaAAAhhhh
Oh no!!!
We really should quit, what do I do, I'm so scared!
Shut up already!!
I don't understand!!
I don't see anything
What is this... It's creepy
Where are we?
This isn't Hosei or Endo, right
No it's not
They eagerly continue searching for the other two
Does your eldest son bathe with you?
I bathe with him when I'm home
They're so relaxed
Just recently, he's had some teeth pulled
What the heck?
Getting teeth pulled is torture
Things really do change
Idly talking about their family with love
I wish I was at home
Yeah, you were waiting that whole time
They take small, uneasy steps, as the visibility is almost completely zero
Bad Visibility
Unsure Footing
Walking in total darkness for 30 minutes
In the darkness is a mysterious building
Should we go here?
Go where?
There's an arrow here, is there a door?
Ohhh?
Do we go in?
This is the worst
This is scary... Ahhhh
Arriving at the destination
Oh no
Open the wooden box Retrieve the stone slab
Open the wooden box
Retrieve the stone slab
How should we open it?
Lift it-
Lift it up and open it
I already hate this
Prank incoming in seconds
Let's go in order
Ready go
A skeleton hidden in the wall
Whatwhatwhat?
That shocked me, ugh...
What what what?
Is this it?
Ah, you're right those are slabs
2 slabs discovered
They were there
Those are slabs
That's it
Hosei and Endo wait in the sacred shrine
With the slabs, they have confirmed that the other 2 are waiting in the sacred shrine
They try to hurry there, but-
The door won't open
Huh?
This sucks...
No way
Wait
Are we locked in?
Prank incoming in seconds
What?
It was locked
The ceiling lowers with great force
That's scary
That scared me... Damnit...
That's so scary!
This isn't okay
That's dangerous...
We're stuck
Isn't there an exit somewhere?
An exit? Where?
Why don't we try that again, now that we're down here?
Ouch, Ow, Oof
Let's try opening the door from down here
Aahhhh it opened!
The door opened
It's open
It's open it's open
It's open, it's open
Uwaaa
Shut up already
He just couldn't stop talking
After following the track for one hour
the four have returned to the tunnel
That was long
For sure, that was long
When Heipo joins us, Tanaka seems somewhat dependable
Looking at myself objectively...
"Where are we going?" "I WANNA GO HOME" , he says
Like he's a 5 year old kid!!
Since his help is unwanted, Heipo is withdrawn
They set out for the sacred shrine
All three are exhausted
Come on...
It's pretty muddy
It's muddy
Hosei and Endo get to just take it easy this whole time
You're damn right
Is this it on our left?
Isn't this it?
The Sacred Shrine
Oh there are stone slabs there
HEYYYY WE'RE IN HERE
Inside the shrine, the two wait
HEYYYYY
Using the two stone slabs, they enter the shrine
They're here
So, it's this huh
That's it
When we put it together, we'll see who it is
Insert the slabs to reveal the face
It's that kind of thing
It's one of those
This goes like this, first
There. And this one
Right
WE'RE HERE WE'RE HERE
Sure, hold on
WE'RE HERE
Oh it's Hanako
The doors to the shrine open
It opened!
It's open
Thank you
Thanks
Him too!!
He has bangs like Kawai Shunichi
Wha- Who?
Endo was attacked by the white makeup gang
They came in the room and swarmed him
I had no idea what was happening
Oh I see
Just like his partner Tanaka
They kept yelling like "Gwaah!"
They set his hair with gel
Hair gelled identically like Tanaka
Oh they did up it nicely
They did what?
Kawai Shunichi's bangs, apparently
Yes
Is that it?
Shunichi's bangs...?
Hosei and Endo were successfully rescued!
Then
Flowing out a radiant light
From within the shrine, a light flowed out
What's this?
A golden...
Daisuke Miyagawa sculpture
T/N: Skull, sculpture. Another play on words.
(Daisuke Miyagawa and Hanako) Cookie sure loves those two
Yes
Is it okay if we just take this sculpture?
We're treasure hunters, you know
That's right
I see
Oh right
Right
I get it, I get it
Let's take it
Us? Well, I really don't know if we should...
It's gotta be you
We had to do everything up till now
We did all that adventuring, right?
Right
Let's take it together
Got it
Is it okay?
It's okay to take this, right?
Right
You have to get the treasure, I think
I think so
Should we take it together?
We're taking it
Ready-
Sudden tremors
How dare they! The golden Daisuke Miyagawa sculpture has been stolen!
Because of you "He" will be awakened!
Quick! Run!
Otherwise! Otherwise something bad will happen to you!
HELLO EVERYBODY
Is your wife making miso soup again today?
Giant Emperor
Is your wife making miso soup again today?
Is she making it!?
You there! You stole my treasure, didn't you!
Aha~! The great emperor is angry~!
I don't know what's going to happen to you~!
I don't know what's going to happen to you...
Trying to get away?!?!
A boulder fell into the shrine
What do we do?
Do we run?
Sirens signal catastrophe
I can't see
Let's run
This way!
That's right
Watch your feet
That looks like it
Careful, careful
Wait wait
What's happening~?
Where are we going?
5-man pedal-car escape
Oh look, there's more
Oh no! Hamada, are you coming?
Walking would be faster, though
Every year...
You have to slip your legs in
Is this good?
Okay, let's pedal
Ready, go
Prank incoming in seconds
Like this
Like this?
Let's go slow
Sorry, my foot
But that's-
Giant
Emperor
It's coming!
Scary scary scary scary
That's actually scary!
Go faster!
Brother grandchild grandchild grandchild
Aren't you getting hot?
That's hot
Hot!
He's coming, he's coming!
Wow
Let's run!
They all make it out safely
This is divine punishment
Let's go
That's scary
"We don't have money" they say
You just threw a ton of cash at this thing!
Seriously
Research Lab - 19 hours have passed
As new treasure hunters
The five men
Have faced grueling trials
Having conquered all the chaos
Finally
They've come upon that moment
Everyone
The treasure hunter training was long, but it's finally over
YES!
Good work
Finally
It's already become 2019 now
2019, huh?
Research Lab - Entrance
We're done
Happy New Year!
2019...
There he is
At last, let's end things with a treasure hunter riddle
Huh?
Oh, that's a nice idea
Then please finish it off cleanly
Then, here I go
Alright
In regards to treasure hunting, I will reveal something about Matsumoto Hitoshi
And that is?
And that is
Your bodybuilding must be tough
Wait, do I have that wrong...?
Huh? What does that mean?
In regards to treasure hunting, I will be Matsumoto Hitoshi...
Yes
I will be Matsumoto Hitoshi...
Ack
That's enough
That doesn't finish things off
That's enough
Please let me say it, this is the last thing, I'll say it properly this time
This isn't how you end things
That's enough, that's enough
I got Endo's recoil too...
I'll be leaving now
You're going to leave first?!
Pardon me... Yes! I'll be leaving now!
Farewell
That was horrible
Everyone, if you leave, it'll really be over
Yep
The number of times their asses were hit
Matsumoto Hitoshi
Hamada Masatoshi
Endo Shozo
Tanaka Naoki
Tsukitei Hosei
That was a horrible finish
That was the last, would've been nice if he could've finished it
Who is it?
Konayuki (Powdered Snow)
Fujimaki Ryouta (from Remioromen)
T/N: Remioromen is a rock band who debuted in 2000. Konayuki, one of their hit songs, won Best Pop Video Award from the MTV Video Music Awards Japan in 2006.
Oh, Konayuki?
Konayuki
U
Fujiwara on a horse bike, always a smile on his face
ma
U
CHA
ma
RI
CHA
no
ru
RI
no
Fu
ji
ru
Fu
wa
ra
ji
wa
ra
I
tsu
I
mo
tsu
ni
mo
ya
ni
ke
ya
ga
ke
o
ga
o
MA
SA
Masatoshi makes us laugh, even though we're looking at the same wig
MA
TO
SA
SHI
TO
de
SHI
wa
de
ra
wa
e
ra
ru
e
yo
ru
yo
O
na
O
ji
ZU
na
ji
RA
ZU
RA
mi
te
mi
ru
no
te
ni
ru
no
ni
O
shi
Got hit in the ass, it's time to start
O
ri
bu
shi
ri
ta
bu
re
ta
te
re
te
I
yo
I
i
yo
i
ha
ji
yo
ha
ma
ji
ru
ma
n
ru
da
n
da
BA
On the bus, Leader Haruna relentlessly spits out venom
SU
BA
de
SU
de
KE
SU
BAN
KE
Ha
BAN
ru
Ha
na
ru
ga
na
ga
Do
ku
Do
wo
ha
ku
wo
ki
ma
ha
ki
ku
ma
ru
ku
ru
Chi
Behind Chidori's vicinity, we found smoke
do
Chi
ri
no
do
ri
u
shi
no
u
ro
shi
fu
ro
kin
fu
ka
kin
ra
ka
ra
Ke
mu
Ke
ri
mu
mi
ri
tsu
mi
ke
tsu
ta
ke
yo
ta
yo
KYA
RA
They aren't part of his persona, but Furutachi gives it his all
ni
KYA
wa
RA
ni
na
wa
i
na
ke
i
do
ke
do
Fu
ru
Fu
ta
chi
ru
ta
ya
chi
ri
ya
ki
ri
ru
ki
n
da
ru
n
da
TO
While the trio play limbo, boobooboobs, boobooboobs
RI
TO
O
RI
de
O
RI
de
N
RI
BO
N
O
BO
shi
O
na
shi
ga
na
ra
ga
PA
ra
PAI
PA
PAI
PA
PAI
PA
O
na
PAI
Even though it's the same Hyokkori, there is no laughter
ji
O
na
hyo
k
ji
hyo
ko
k
ri
de
ko
ri
de
Wa
ra
Wa
i
ra
na
i
do
na
o
do
ki
o
na
ki
i
na
i
Ko
ko
Though their hearts are healed
Ko
ro
ko
ni
ro
ni
i
ya
i
sa
ya
re
sa
te
mo
re
te
mo
Shi
White face paint Masatoshi is just creepy
ro
Shi
nu
ro
ri
nu
no
ri
MA
no
SA
MA
TO
SA
SHI
TO
wa
SHI
wa
KI
MO
KI
i
MO
i
da
ke
da
ke
O
to
Hey Ototake, if you had fun from the bottom of your heart
O
ta
ke
to
ta
Ne
ke
e
Ne
Is that where you use it?
e
Ko
ko
Ko
ro
ko
no
ro
so
no
ko
so
ka
ra
ko
ka
ra
ta
no
shi
ta
no
me
shi
ta
me
na
ta
ra
na
ra
Ah
Fu
Ah
ta
Fu
The duo's grill jokes were built up only to be brought down
ri
no
ta
ri
no
DE
P
DE
PA
P
N
PA
no
JO
N
no
O
JO
KU
O
KU
A
ga
A
ri
ga
ta
ri
o
shi
ta
o
te
shi
ta
te
ta
Ha
Hana's will to become an actress was displayed through her skills
na
Ha
wa
na
wa
jyo
yu
jyo
u
yu
no
u
i
no
ji
i
de
ji
de
CHI
KA
CHI
RA
KA
mi
RA
se
mi
tsu
se
ke
tsu
te
ke
te
I
Inoue gets the black excavator, pressing down until there's an explosion
no
I
u
no
e
u
ni
e
ku
ni
ro
SHO
ku
ro
BE
RU
SHO
BE
RU
MU
GYU
T
MU
GYU
to
T
ha
to
re
tsu
ha
re
ma
de
tsu
ma
de
KA
GI
The key doesn't reach, Hitori blacks out
KA
to
GI
do
to
ka
do
na
i
ka
na
i
Hi
to
ri
Hi
to
BU
ri
RA
BU
KKU
RA
A
U
KKU
TO
A
U
TO
Ko
Even if you say you can't answer, the ass won't hold up, hold up, hold up
ta
Ko
e
ta
ra
e
re
ra
na
re
i
na
i
n
na
te
n
KE
te
TSU
KE
mo
ta
TSU
nai
mo
ta
mo
ta
nai
mo
ta
mo
nai
ta
mo
nai
ta
Mu
ne
Mary who rubs her breasts, and Mama who whispers her song
nai
Mu
mo
mu
ne
mo
ME
A
mu
ME
RII
A
RII
Sa
sa
Sa
ya
sa
ku
ya
MA
ku
MA
no
MA
u
no
ta
u
ta
Ki
Kimura's love for Matsumoto
mu
Ki
ra
mu
MA
ra
TSU
MA
MO
TSU
TO
MO
a
TO
i
a
wo
i
wo
Shu
Just talking about him for a little immediately causes a grown man to cry
ko
Shu
shi
ko
sha
shi
be
sha
ru
be
ko
ru
to
ko
da
to
ke
da
de
ke
de
Su
gu
Su
ni
gu
o
ni
to
o
ko
to
na
ko
ki
na
ki
Ta
Hey Takashima, in your underwear, you've exposed your super masochist side
ka
Ta
shi
ka
ma
shi
Ne
e
ma
Ne
e
PA
N'
PA
I
CHI
N'
I
su
CHI
ga
su
ta
ga
de
ta
de
DO-
M
DO-
wo
sa
M
wo
ra
su
sa
ra
su
Ah
GU
DA
The same repetitive joke is a gift of laughter to us
GU
tsu
ku
DA
tsu
ku
O
ya
O
ku
so
ya
ku
so
no
ku
NE
no
TA
NE
TA
Go
shuu
Go
gi
wa
shuu
gi
ra
wa
i
ra
da
i
yo
da
yo
U
Hey Ueshima, even without having to pinch your balls, Degawa gets angry
e
U
shi
e
ma
shi
Ne
e
ma
Ne
e
Ta
ma
Ta
wo
ma
ha
wo
sa
ha
me
sa
zu
me
ni
zu
ni
De
ga
De
wa
ga
wa
KI
wa
RE
KI
ru
RE
ru
Ah
F-
Even if the female audience is creeped out, continue on without shame
so
F-
u
so
u
DO
N
DO
hi
N
ki
hi
sa
ki
re
sa
te
re
mo
te
mo
Ko
ri
Ko
zu
ri
tsu
zu
tsu
ke
zu
ta
ke
i
ta
Ah
i
Ah
Ko
to
This year again, the old guys are whipped without injuries
Ko
shi
to
mo
shi
Ne
e
mo
Ne
e
Ro
u
Ro
ta
u
i
ta
MU
CHI
i
MU
u
chi
CHI
u
chi
Ke
ga
Ke
ni
ga
n
ni
da
n
zu
da
ni
zu
ni
Ah
Go-
ni
The five laughed their way to the end of the Heisei era to the new year
Go-
n
ni
de
n
de
He
i
He
se
i
se
sa
i
sa
go
i
mo
go
mo
Wa
ra
t
Wa
ra
te
t
to
te
shi
to
ko
shi
se
ko
ta
se
ta
May this year be overflowing with laughter
And so, we've moved onto the new year during the video playback
Everyone, Happy New Year!
Happy New Year!
Thank you very much
This year, the slap was done so decisively
It was like watching art
That slap was a clean slap
About the culprit, honestly, like the Hipopo descendant...
I have no idea what the hell was being said to me
Well, yes, you're right
What and why... What is going on?!
This year's was a bit difficult
It was so difficult!
It's like, "What does this even mean?"
From the time Professor Daikichi started explaining, it made no sense
No sense at all
"What the hell is this?"
Thus
We hope you continue to watch Gaki no Tsukai in 2019!
Please
Good job everyone
This story is fictional. All business names and other entities are fabricated.
For those who want to watch the Absolutely No Laughing Treasure Hunters again, please go to Hulu
THEN WHY DON'T YOU GODDAMN DO IT
The previous series are also being streamed!