Team Gaki Presents
Team Leader: Rich Translators: Conjyak BabyStand solar Zebestt sonjeigo photodiode GakiNoSuitGuy AshAbs funtonite Typesetters: Small Carl Adilofax Sacro Dudedafool carebu samsamuel Nigel Amria Textualpoacher kannibleklown Nojiko Caleb Barrett Karaoke: Konohana Niji Translation Check: Oolong Quality Checkers: John Dread Ecksdee Elestriel Moocau
We're all in this together, right
It's a good story, though
Accidentally
It's a good story, but
Well yeah it's good, but..
I don't quite understand
what category it belongs in
However, there is one more person they won't let off just yet...
You entered the wrong car?
Well, the car looked exactly like mine
And of course, I leave the restaurant and the car's there.
So I thought it was mine
You can't just assume that
How did you notice it wasn't your car?
Did you get seated before you noticed?
I opened the sliding door in the back
And as soon as I did the driver went "Wrong wrong!!"
"Wrong wrong!!"
He said "Wrong wrong"?
"Wrong wrong"!!
He just went "Wrong wrong!!"?
"Wrong wrong"
"Oh it's Hama-chan!" He didn't say anything like that?
That sounds like you did the same thing the day before yesterday
You made him pretty irritated!!
That's an amazing reaction for being the first time
The driver must have been quite scared too
The place of the special class is within view!!
That's it, right? The special class
Huh?
What?
EH? EH?! EH?
Hey... What is this...?
EH? EH?! EH?
A mysterious ensemble approaches
Someone's coming!
Who is that!?
Oy! You!
Scary!
Get off this bus right now!
General
Kendo Kobayashi
If you don't this little thing will blow your brains out
GET OFF!!
Take them away
So this is how they introduced the black figures
The hell? This is bad
That is that guy, right?
STOP YOUR BLABBERING!!
WOAH!! That's a loud voice!
Stop complaining
Ah, that time it barely came out
So he has a gentle side
This guy is always so mad
He's also really rude
CLIMB THE STAIRS!!
Such a loud voice
No one would defy him
A small step
He should say something about this step
Oy, watch out for this step
Ah, he did
He really can be gentle
His bad guy good guy shtick is all over the place
You have 5 minutes. Change into these
5 minutes is almost nothing
Okay, let's make it 7 minutes
Oh, we get 2 extra minutes
He was laughing the whole time
What an idiot
Laughing out loud
Right!
Please don't say that
Per the mysterious General's instructions, they change clothes
What can be waiting for them!?
You will now participate in our school's special class
If you can't overcome this trial
You'll be blown up!!
Exploding vests
Your vest will explode
What the hell is this?
Escape Game from Hell
Mummy
Strength
Spinning
Explosion
Escape game from hell
Clear the 4 trials and
escape from being blown to bits
Having only you guys here truly makes my eyes sore
So we have one handsome boy prepared for you
GET YOUR ASS IN HERE!!
Nice to meet you
Supporter
Ryo Narita
Hello
Nice to meet you
My name is Narita
Ryo Narita
Academy winner of best newcomer
Participating in
the trials
If you can't complete the trials
your vest will explode
I don't want that
He doesn't seem very eager. Is that okay?
Are you okay?
Supporting actor not at all eager to help
Are you okay?
Yes sir, I'm okay
You sure?
I'm okay
Well then, Narita
Yes sir
To get everyone primed for fight
do a war-cry for us
Uh... Yes
I'll do my best!
He's not ready at all
We don't need that
Didn't your energy just drop a little?
You are allowed to laugh during the trials!!
Laughing is okay
First up is the mummy's sarcophagus!!
This is new
Will we have to cooperate?
That has to be it
The mummy's sarcophagus
Get in here!
The mummy's sarcophagus
Makes your jaw drop, right? This is the mummy's sarcophagus
This must be blowing the budget
The first challenger is Tanaka!!
Eh, please no
Ah, so you're getting in there
I don't want to do this
Get yourself ready
Challenger Tanaka
Rules
Answer 3 questions within 2 minutes
Get them all right and you're clear
If you fail, you will be wrapped like a mummy
plus a severe punishment
Understood?
Yes
Then let's get started!
Yes!
Scary stuff
First Quiz
Printed in the new edition of the elementary school picture book "NEO"
Name 10 species of sharks
Okay, I can do this
He's good at this
This really is a new pattern
Sandbar Shark
Bull Shark
Megamouth Shark
Whale Shark
Hammerhead Shark​
Scalloped Hammerhead
Great Hammerhead
Goblin Shark
Frilled Shark
Smalleye Pygmy Shark
Wow, he can do this!
Almost there!
Smooth Lanternshark
Roughskin Dogfish
Sand Tiger Shark​
This is getting hard
Sand tiger shark​
Tawny Nurse Shark​
Isn't this too hard?
Slender Bamboo Shark
About 1 minute left
Only 3 left!
Blackbelly Lanternshark
Incredible!
Dogfish
Ah, it's so close!
Oh no!
It's coming!
Japanese Grenadier
It's up to his chest!
Blue Shark​
Can he do it?
Shortfin Mako Shark
1st quiz cleared
First quiz cleared with 38 seconds left
38 seconds... I used way too much time
How are you feeling, Tanaka?
I messed up the pacing, didn't I?
Well then, next quiz
Will he be okay?
Second Quiz
T/N: M-1 Grand Prix is the biggest manzai competition show that occurs annually where Matsumoto is one of the regular judges.
Of the M-1 Grand Prix
Name 10 previous winners
Oh, that's also really difficult
Nakagawake
Sandwich Man
NON STYLE
Time is running out
You've got 3 so far
Isn't it best to do them in order?
BLACK MAYONNAISE
TUTORIAL
5 left! 15 seconds
Masuda Okada
Eh.. Slim.. No not Slimclub..
A complete mummy!
I don't like this!!
He became a proper mummy
He became a mummy so fast
So that's how I looked
He became a mummy in less than a blink
A real mummy!
I can't do this!
We have another punishment too
Eh, why!?
And that is THIS!
What? I'm scared!
Rancid CO gas punishment
2
Stand by!
FIRE!
Ueghh it stinks!
What is this?
TANAKA!
It stinks!
It smells so bad!
We don't mess around
He got sealed up
This is what happens if you can't name the winners of M-1
Ueughh, it stinks!
The next challenger is MATSUMOTO HAMADA!!
It's the both of you
You can't be serious
Get up on the mummy machine!
Still stinks!
Next challengers Matsumoto Hamada
Embrace each other!!
How does it feel? Feeling the warmth
There's more than I thought
There is?
Hamada, how about you?
Yes?
Can you feel the warmth?
Thank you
Should I take that as gratitude?
Rules
3 minutes to beat 3 quizzes
Rules
Both will be wrapped into a mummy if they fail
and also suffer a strict punishment
Damn
Let's go
First Quiz
T/N: "King of Skits" or also known as "King of Conte" is a TV competition of the best short comedy skits. Downtown has been host and judge of this show.
From King of Skits, which you host
Name 5 previous winners
Yeah
Start!
Buffalo Goro
Quick!
Quick
Tokyo 03
You got it
Tokyo 03
Rice
Good good
Ugh I'm really panicking here!
THOSE GUYS
Which one?
Viking
Oh, Viking
Viking
Hurry up
Hamada, you say something!
Oh I don't know any of them
You know one!
Just one more, one last group
Kamaitachi!
Kamaitachi
Wonderful!
Round 1 Success
What?
Stop the time!
We're really stuck together
Seriously, he's doing nothing
Hamada, try naming just one group
King of Skits?
King of Skits
Do I do that?
But we cleared it, right?
You cleared it
I felt like that was fast
The timer has 2 minutes, 26 seconds remaining
Still have time
Thank you
Still quite a bit left
Second Quiz
From the Yoshimoto Agency
Name 5 solo female acts
Because of Hamada...
There's Tomochika, right?
Tomochika
And Yuriyan?
Yuriyan Retriever
There's the really thin one
The really thin one?
Who?
Who was it?
Well, doesn't matter if it's not the really thin one...
There are still plenty
It would be alright if she wasn't really thin
Who else is there?
ASIAN
No, that's a duo act
Your natural stupidity is showing!!
Edo Harumi!
Edo Harumi
Ohh Edo
Two left, you have lots of choices!
Who is there?
Yokosawa Natsuko!
Yokosawa Natsuko
Just one left!
Hamada give us one
Just one more
Hamada give us one
Who's that skinny girl?
I said I can't remember the skinny girl's name
But she's the only solo act I can think of
The super skinny one
1 minute, 30 seconds remaining
Think!
You aren't naming anyone
The one with the clothes drying rack, is she from Yoshimoto?
She's not with Yoshimoto
No?
Makino Suteteko?
Makino Suteteko
She's completely different!!
No!
We don't have time for this!
Who is it?
Who else?
Who's the last one?
There's...
A solo
I don't... Yamada Hanako!
Yamada Hanako
Watanabe Naomi!
Right, Naomi
Round 2 Success
See, there's a mountain of them
Who else?
Daita Hikaru
Oniyakko
Other Answers
Daita Hikaru
Ahhh
Yeah...
Oniyakko
Right!
Oh, Oniyakko
This next quiz is a huge freebie
Ok
This next quiz is a huge freebie
What?
Last New Year's Eve Matsumoto received this same quiz
And last year had the exact same questions
So you should have no trouble
Hollywood Star Name Pop Quiz
Last time, he was quizzed on celebrity names
Last year Matsumoto really struggled with these questions
Who's next?
I have no clue
Hamada, for me this is completely hopeless
What the hell?
You have just 1 minute remaining
Third Quiz
You've got this!
Yeah
Hollywood Stars
Name all 5 pictured
Please name all 5 of the foreign celebrities pictured here
Right right right
In no particular order, right?
Yes
Nicholas Cage
Where is he?
Quick quick!
Tom Hanks
Ohhh that one is uh
Tommy Lee Jones
Right right right, who's that on the left?
The second one?
From the left
Keanu Reeves
Two more!
Michael J. Fox
Uh and who's that?
Uh it's uh it's
"Uh it's"?
That's uh I know it
Leonardo Dicaprio
Ah! Yes! Yes!
Leonardo Dicaprio
Why'd you go and win?
Of course we would
I really wanted to see a Downtown mummy...
We wanted to see a Downtown mummy!
What, why?
What are you doing giving a thumbs up to your partner when you both won?
How was it, Narita?
I know I should be happy, but y'know...
Nah
It ended so softly...
You kind of wanted to see it?
I kind of did
With this Hollywood star-like behavior
The wrath of the gods has been pacified...
They move outdoors to challenge the next stage
The next escape challenge
Is going to slaughter all of you
This is crazy
Look at that!!
What's that?
What the heck is that?
What?
I'll have you climb this rope
Superhuman Strength Stage
Climb the rope and break the ball
Climb the rope and break open the ball
to win this Superhuman Strength Stage
The ball is 8 meters high, so can they do it!?
T/N: 8 meters is about 26.25ft.
Can they climb it!?
Can you even break that?
With one hand?
One handed is just not possible
Among you, only 1 challenger needs to succeed for a clear
Rules
Okay
That's high~
OK OK
If you fail, the leader will receive a punishment
Leader?
Challengers
Hosei Leader: Matsumoto
I'm the leader now?
I'm hearing this for the first time
Matsumoto is the leader
Now I'm the leader and I just did the mummy thing...
Isn't that an awful lot for me?
Prepare yourselves!!
He's not even going to listen to me...
First up is Hosei!
Challenger: Hosei
Let's go!
Yeah!
Challenge
It'd be nice if we could end it here
We're really counting on you
You seem awfully confident?
T/N: Kendo is a swords martial arts with bamboo and wooden swords.
I practiced Kendo until my 3rd year of middle school
That's old news
How old are you now?
That's forever ago
51 years old
That's over 40 years ago
Well then, let's go!!
Good luck!
Go for it!
Uh Hosei?
Do it!
Hosei?
This is awful!
GO! JUST GO!
That's good!
OK Hosei!
Hosei
Good, good, let's go Hosei!
Yes!
Don't look down!! If you look down you'll get scared!!
Yes!
As if that's scary!!
His feet are on the ground
If you look down your legs will be paralyzed with fear!!
Yes!
Your feet are on the ground!!
Giving up already?!
Hosei?
Really?
Let's go!
Hosei Fails
Crap!!
He says "Crap!" even though
Barely anything, huh?
His feet were on the ground the whole time
Alright, Matsumoto!
Me?
Challenger Matsumoto
If I need to I can let go, right?
You can let go safely
Oh really?
Oi, Matsumoto
Yes
Because this is a "Superhuman Strength Stage"
You can use your
Arms only
Seriously?
The leader Matsumoto will climb with only his arms
He can't use his legs?
Yeah
Climb with only your arms!
Now, let's go!
Huh? Hold on
Okay
Let's go!!
I'm going
Matsumoto's challenge
You can do it, Leader!
Wow
Leader!
You can do it!
He's got a crazy under bite!
Why is he sticking out his chin like that?
Leader, you're amazing!
Matsumoto Success
That was awful
Really?
Leader, that was amazing!!
It was really bad
You really got it!
As expected of our leader
Hell yeah!
Leader!
You beat it, leader!
What was with that under bite?
He's been like that
He's been like that? Oh, I see!
Man, that was pretty tough
It was tough
Hell Escape Game
Mummy
Strength
Spinning
Explosion
The next stage of the Hell Escape Game is...
The next challenge you'll be doing
Is this stage!!
To test your sense of balance, the Spinning Stage!!
Oh no this is rough
That's unexpected
Spin 30 times and then walk straight to make it to the goal in 10 seconds
Spinning Stage
Fall into the flour hell on either side and lose
Rules
There will be 3 challengers
If they all fail, the leader will receive a punishment
Challengers
Tanaka
Narita
Leader: Hamada
Hosei
No way...
The first challenger is
Tanaka
But after this
Something extraordinary happens!
Goal
Challenger: Tanaka
Use both hands to grip the white rods on either side
Oh, sorry, okay!
Shouldn't you hold it lower?
Well then
Lower
Spinning Machine
It doesn't matter
Here's a counter
That's fast!
It's too fast!
I can't! It's too much! I feel sick!
It was so bad
10 spins left!
That speed!
It was 30 spins after all
30 spins cleared! Start!
Woah
Go quickly!
If he falls into the flour he's... OUT!
What just happaned?
What the heck was that?
What the hell, man
That was the worst performance!!
You gotta do better than that
You're kidding me, right?
Did that really just happen!?
That was no good
Start!
Go quickly!
If he falls into the flour he's... OUT!
What just happened?
That doesn't make sense
No, it does
You stopped there!
You rolled to the side after stopping
Rolling, rolling, rolling
My head was spinning, okay?
Why did you roll that way?
I couldn't stop my body
Stop lying
You stopped on the ground, then rolled over
Stopped and rolled
Is that even possible?
It's possible
Are you serious?
Watch the replay and you'll be shocked
This machine has that effect
Exactly!
Really?
And next up, Narita will surely suffer the same fate
I'm counting on you, man
Stay on standby, Narita!
Good luck
It looks even scarier after seeing that
Challenger Narita Ryo
Next up, Narita Ryo
Don't mess up, Narita!
It was seriously hard
You can do it
Make it happen!
Okay
And don't fly off
Alright then,
Begin the spin!
Here I go
Oh crap!!
My legs are gonna fall off!!
I can see that
Eh! Wait!
Wait! This is bad!
20 spins left!
His legs are going to fall off?
This isn't good at all!
His legs are going to fall off?
I can't keep up!
Hang in there
Seriously! My legs!
Your legs are going to fall off?
His legs can't keep up
My legs! It hurts! Seriously!
C'mon, you can do it!
You can do it!
Go!
You can do it!
Start!
Can he do it?
This is accurate
True
This is accurate
This!! This!!
Tanaka, like this!
That is one way but
I was doing seriously doing my best
Narita showed the the way it should be!!
No no! I think so too! That was great
Yeah, that's bound to happen
That was great
Normally you would run this way
This way
I don't remember a thing.
Eh?
I was just heading straight
Really?
You spun clockwise so you'd naturally sway to the right
Yep, exactly
You faced the right way, but rolled the other way
I can't believe it
It makes no sense!
Give me a break!
I have to agree that it was unnatural
This was just too much
No, seriously! These things can happen too, right?
No way! Narita spun clockwise so he swayed this way
That's right
There's no control of your body, right?
You were focusing on running straight, weren't you?
Yes
I can understand that, I can sympathize with that
Yeah, that will happen
Right?
Landed onto his nose then kept rolling
It's just like the convenience store's hand-rolled sushi
In terms of how it's made, yeah
It's kinda like that
In the end, it's impossible. There's no way we can do it
There is only one man who is good at this
I'm not good!
Leader!
Back in the day I used to be good,
but I haven't done it in years
As you're the leader, that means...
50 spins!
50 spins is crazy
Leader Hamada challenges 50 spins
Seriously?
50?
Stop messing around!
Legend, you're up
Challenger Hamada
56-year-old Hamada Masatoshi. Can he prove that his skills still exist?
Good luck, Hamada-san
Why the heck is it 50? 30 was enough!
Alright then, let the spin begin!
50 spins...
50 is quite a lot
Whoa! I'm going to fly off!
I'm really going fly off!
It's a breeze for him
He's having fun!
My legs! My legs are going to fly off!
He's having so much fun!
No, seriously!
Narita was saying this too, my legs will seriously fly off!
It's too easy for him
I'm getting dizzy just watching
Same
30! You've reached 30!
My legs are going to fly off!
Almost 40!
Almost 40! Hang in there, Hamada-san!
10 spins left!
No, no, no!
This is amazing
Forty-four, five...
No way! This is impossible
Hamada-san!
My head is spinning like crazy!
Go for it!
You can do it!
Wow!
Unbelievable!
It's not as good as before, but he's still got it
I would've sped through that in the past
That was truly amazing
In the past he actually ran normally
Just like a video game character
From the NES generation
T/N: NES as in Nintendo Entertainment System. This is the console before the Super Nintendo (SNES) that used floppy disks for games before they changed to using cartridges.
That's how those game characters walked in those days
Who runs like that?
Cleared!
Thanks!
Well done
Mummy
Strength
Spinning
Explosion
Hell Escape Game
And now, they've reached the final challenge
What the...
No way
It's huge
This is the last escape game
Between the Explosions
This is the last escape game. Between the Explosions!
Here you will
choose 1 member to go on the reverse bungee
One member will be strapped on the reverse bungee.
All other members must answer questions correctly to pass.
Rules
The other five members must complete a quiz
If all members answer correctly, then the chosen member is released
However if even one member fails to answer
The reverse bungee is launched
Into the air, followed by explosions, then death
That's stupid
That's insane
First, decide who will ride the reverse bungee
Discuss, then choose one person
You guys should choose
Ready, set, Narita
No, no, no. It can't be
Narita is your choice?
No way
This is Gaki no Tsukai
Of course
This is your baptism
This is Downtown's Gaki no Tsukai!
You weren't listening!
Matsumoto-san, explain to him that if you fly
I will literally soil myself
Do you really want to see that?
Yeah, not really...
Alright then!
I have no other choice but to do this, don't I?
No other choice
Standby!
We'll all answer the question for you!
The reverse bungee victim is Narita Ryo
Thus, Narita Ryo is sacrificed for the reverse bungee
It'll be alright
There's no way it will snap and send you to the national highway, right?
Not a chance
Even if it does, I will do something about it
You will do something about it?
He will do something if it happens
Narita, how are you feeling?
Yes
Narita, how are you feeling?
This is the worst
All we have to do is answer correctly, right?
Please. I'm counting on you guys
We'll set you free
Here are the rules
Okay
Time limit 2 minutes
Rules
I'm counting on you!
Two minutes!
Two minutes?
Well then
The question is this!
Who's the smart one?
Matsumoto
Hamada
Hosei
Tanaka
Endo
Who's the smart one?
Whoever has the answer, please start
What does that mean?
Smart one?
Please answer it
You have two minutes
Who is the smart one...
Who is smart one?
State the name and reason
Hm?
Eh? What does it mean? What does it mean?
I didn't get this one at all
It's is a riddle
A riddle, really?
No one is moving
Please start talking
Hey!
Who's the smart one?
Who is the smart one in the group!?
State the name and reason
Seriously, please let us know
I seriously don't get it
Who's the smart one?
Matsumoto-san
Whenever you're ready
The reason is... Correct!
Yeah!
Hosei Correct
Thank you so much! Wait, all of you guys have to answer...?
The reason is... Correct!
Matsumoto Correct
You can do it!
The reason is... Correct!
I have no clue
The reason is... Correct!
Tanaka Correct
Nice!
It'll be alright, Narita!
Only two people left
You can solve it
We'll save you, Ryo!
You can solve it!
Please answer it!
They already solved it. They're just pretending
For the drama?
30 seconds left!
I seriously have no idea
I already solved it without looking,
you know!
20 seconds left!
The smart one!
Please!
15! 15 seconds!
Look at it from another perspective!
The alphabet!
Hint! It's a hint!
TEN... NINE... EIGHT
Change it into the alphabet!
The alphabet
Please answer it!
Correct!
Hurry up!
Time's up!
Hamada-san!
Yes?
What on earth are you doing!!
Who cares if it's for the drama or whatever
Seriously, I have no idea
The biggest hint is the alphabet
It's the alphabet, man
Who's the smart one?
The alphabet?
Who starts with the letter "E"?
T/N: In Japanese, "smart person" is phrased as, "one with a good head". However, another interpretation would be, "one with 'E' at the start" because the word for "good" is pronounced just like the letter "E" and "head" can be interpreted as "the start".
Who starts with the letter "E"?
Yeah, that's it
Ah, name that starts with "E"! Endo!
ANSWER Endo Shozo
T/N: Hamada struggled because Japanese is a phonetic language, meaning that each letter/syllable is only pronounced in one way. So the "E" in "Endo" is always an "eh" sound, never an "ii" sound. "Romaji" means the romanization of the Japanese language.
Spelled in romaji, the "E" is pronounced as "ii"
Ryo, my bad!!
Why are you laughing?!
HAMADA-SAN
Please don't laugh!
We are truly sorry
As we're all aware
Into the sky, followed by explosions, then death
To make up for the disappointment
let's at least have the explosion be brilliant
Narita-kun, any last words?
Let's hear it
I don't care what happens to you all!!
It seems he has accepted his fate
Let's begin
Well then, launching in
I wouldn't like to be in his shoes
Three!
Brace yourself!
Launch!
That's crazy!
Cracking up
That is hell
Cracking up
That is hell!
That was scary
I know, right
If he soiled himself I wouldn't be surprised
Yeah
Are you okay?
It's-it's still moving
Want to go a second round?
I no go!!
I no go?
I no go!!
You will no go, right?
Guys, was everything okay ?
Yeah
That was a great experience, huh
I'm not okay!!
Narita Ryo-san, thank you very much
Wait ah...
Thank you!
Wait ah...
He's God
That was amazing
He's like the Supreme Commander
Supreme Commander
Oh yeah, true!
He'll make commands
Please hurry up and release me~!!
He's so cool
The harsh escape games are over
That concludes the escape game
Laughing traps will only get harsher from now on